Responsibility for our own actions

Betting and gambling are serious additions that can ruin family life. I understand that gambling addicts can ask to be blocked from gaming sites or barred from betting shops, at their own request.
If a company then still targets them in any way, is that right?

I think the point of this story was that a large number of the people involved had asked to be banned from gambling on the site in order to help them tackle their addiction. The site had banned them from some parts but not others when it should have been a complete ban. One person was reported as having £1m debt - 99% of people would find that difficult to pay back! A dealer supplying drugs to addicts is more responsible than the addict in the eyes of the law, tobacco companies have been held responsible for smokers addiction and now many food manufacturers are being accused of our food addiction and obesity, so surely this is no different and the company has some responsibility.

Before we judge we should ask ourselves why many ( not all) people gamble ? Why the poorest of towns have the most betting shops etc. Why the lottery is so popular ?

It's easy for people to sit in judgement but these evil betting sites and betting offices pray on the vulnerable and those who have a feeling of hopelessness in their lives that only a windfall or big win could change .

Being a victim is an industry now. We did not have the levels of addictions, debt, and minor illness being inflated to the point here people are unable to function until there was money in it for someone.

Where there's a victim, there is someone making a nice living out of exploiting them, selling them whatever they crave, making excuses for them and padding out their caseload, until they retire, encouraging legal actions, and flogging worthless cures.

Too many people now are encouraged to be inadequate.

Going bankrupt is a rite of passge for some, drugs are commonplace, alcohol cheap, gambling, you don't even have to walk to the bookies you can do it all on line and blame someone else when you come unstuck.

Gone are the days when you felt ashamed for bringing disgrace and worry to your loved ones, no, instead you are encouraged to consider them unsporting when they try to sort you out. You can tell your counsellor your version of events and get some comfort for being a total arse.

We have created a culture dominated be atificial needs and now we find can't fund it all.

I spent 40 years in the 'caring' professions and can only say that until people start to care for themselves, they will always be the victims of someone, even if that is just paid helpers.

It's called 'data mining'. They were targeting people who had blocked themselves from gambling.
They inundated people and typically made an offer for a free bet for £10, then £20, then £50, then started charging knowing that if someone is addicted, once they had bet three times they were hooked again.
This is much more than people just randomly coming across their sites.

Good post, radical, reflecting my general feeling.

I also take on board what eloethan says about my comments on addiction and mental health. I regard addiction as, if not an illness, then a kind of disability. For example, not everyone who smokes gets addicted to nicotine so it seems to me that those who do become addicted to that particular drug have a condition (in their genetic makeup, perhaps) that puts them at a disadvantage compared to the people who don't become addicted. I feel this probably applies to other addictions too, so that there is what might be called an addictive personality.
I like this way of looking at it because a person's genetic makeup is clearly not their fault and perhaps one day we will find direct medical treatment (gene modification) as opposed to indirect (counselling).

I suppose what I've described could just as easily be called a physical illness as a mental one. I'm not keen on the distinction between physical and mental illness anyway because our brains and how they work are just as physical and anything else.

well if you're an example of the "caring professions" then god help us all !!People dont set out to get addicted to anything ..be it food ,drink,drugs or gambling ..circumstances cause the addiction.They may have a drink to make them feel better and after a while that one becomes a bottle and spirals out of control.They may have lost their job and put on a bet to try to win enough to pay that unexpected bill ,have beginners luck and think its the way out of all their financial problems...alas it seldom is but they didn't set out to be an addict and once they are and need help that help SHOULD be available for the...even if its just the betting companies having to take some of the responsibility for aiding the "habit"As you were in those "caring professions" you must be aware that there are countless numbers of people who find it very difficult to care for themselves they are often at the bottom of the list ...or not on it at all .There is a distict lack of compassion for addicts ..unless they're famous ones like Amy Winehouse or Ant McParlane ,the rest are talked about as if they're the scum of the earth ,when in fact they are no worse than their famous counterparts ...just poorer

My thoughts exactly paddyann I can't believe some if the posts on this thread .

I think one can accept what radical has said in general terms AND look sympathetically at how to deal with trouble people get themselves into because of addiction.

The thing is though, that this has always been around it's just different now we have online gambling and even those without work have access to a small amount of money . Why would they not take a chance ( however small it might be) just to try and improve their lives? My grandad used to tell me some horrific stories of men being paid cash at the dock gates for a days work only to gamble it and drink it away within the hour , then go home and take their failure and hopelessness out in their poor wife and children . Stories of men who pawned their children's shoes to gamble on a horse (that invariably lost) in the tiny hope that "this one would be lucky".

Any one of us could find ourselves going down the path of feeling that if we could just get lucky, just once, it would help us out of a situation.
I'm grateful it hasn't been me, as yet.

Yes exactly MissAdventure

Buck passing is the name of the game even in government circles I've discovered. It's never a personal fault - it's always someone else's. How has this happened? I certainly learned to take responsibility in my youth - and there were often times when I didn't like it but tough! Yes there are people with mental health problems - and here I am again on the subject of poor quality support - but not everyone is out of control and needs help some people need to learn self control; not easy and quite harsh I know.

Things change. People and circumstance change. Mental health can change, ether gradually, or in the blink of an eye. Support is needed, for those who, for whatever reason, haven't 'self control'.

I hwas gambling more than I should have online some time ago, and blocked myself from a couple of sites; that takes willpower which is fleeting and difficult for someone in those circumstances, but it would have been much better if there had been a mechanism whereby in one fell swoop I could have blocked myself from all online gambling sites; not sure how it would work, but that would be a useful initaive for the govt. to look into.

Everything is a social construct. We create the world live in for better or worse. Once bankruptcy became a no stigma affair we had people being profligate with money, I remember the 'Bank of Mum and Dad' on TV young people in masses of debt for hand bags and make up, we have people, however stupid and in some cases downright dishonest, being encouraged to claim for whip lash or holiday sickness, where do you think these things come from? They come from the way in which ambulance chasing lawyers have been created.

It is the same with addictions, some people succumb more easily than others but it is their own choice to start.

We have very high numbers of STD now having created a permssive society.

We consturct the ways in which we live and create the casualties as we go.

I think I have in my working life and private life, helped as many people as those who want to continue the victim status of their clients, which is unhealthy and of no real value, unless we are reverting back to the legal leeches who are always ready to claim on their behalf and at the expense of the rest of us.

then you haven't been in close contact with an addictgoldengirl sadly I have and she knew and blamed no one but herself for her situation even though she couldn't find the strength to get herself sorted .She died after "celebrating" her 50th birthday ...alcohol was her addiction and she and her whole family .me as on one of that family did everything in our power to get her off the drink.She tried and was defeated many times ..sometimes the circumstances that life throws at you are too hard to cope with without a crutch..it was for her .She was a lovely bright ,happy friendly young woman until she had the problem that made her pick up that drink ...just like many others ,it was never her intention to become dependant on it

I think there are all kinds of people who are not able to manage certain aspects of life, from all across the board.
My neighbour was a successful business woman, until she had a stroke some time ago. I now consider her very vulnerable, as her understanding of situations has decreased, she is quite depressed, and is easily taken advantage of.

gillybob Me too. Were we always such a judgmental, intolerant society?

I do agree that people should take responsibility for their own actions. I do, however, find the online betting companies seriously worrying. Many of the people who get hooked on those are students or housewives, who are at home much of the time with very little money. The promise of not only a lovely payout, but also a group of new 'friends' may sound irresistable.

There was even a short article about it on the back page of last week's Sunday Times (business section.)

We used to be given proper financial education by our parents, and were told not to spend more than you have, and not to gamble more than you can afford to lose. It's always easier to blame others but it's about time we all became more responsible.

My ex husband was a compulsive gambler. He held down a good job as a Director of a re insurance brokers in the City ...he drew out his 'spending money' on a Friday night...went to the pub, played the fruit machines ..Sat morning to the bookies to gamble on Greyhounds ..Sat afternoon back to the bookies to gamble on the horses ....then played cards in the pub on Sat evening, for money. By Sunday he had run out of money, so he took anything he could find ...my daughter 's (who was 4 at the time) toys, etc ...even took bottles of spirits from our drinks cupboard, bought a book of lottery tickets which he sold for £1 each at the pub and presented the winner with one of the bottles !!....strange men would come to the door and demand money or they were going to beat him up ....like an idiot for years I paid them from the money I saved from working full time.......he even came up to my office one lunch time for £300 to pay someone .to this day I really don't know why I paid up for him, and defended him to everyone ! Eventually one of his colleagues told the rest of the directors , as he was often seen not going into Lloyds but into the bookies ! Then he set up a separate company bank account and somehow was syphoning off money from the company to that account .....he was caught ....I telephoned the company and told his fellow directors that he was a compulsive gambler ..they said they were not going to dismiss him (anyone who knows the City knows this goes on, to save face for the company !) ...but that forthwith they were going to pay all his salary, bonuses, etc into a bank account in my sole name. and suggest he join GA ..which, of course with any addict joining a support group unless it is of your own volition, is never going to work ! Happy he was not ! I would give him money on a Friday ....he broke my ribs once as I refused him any more money ! I was chased with a knife had my finger broken in the car door ...I could go on ! Eventually I discovered he had not been paying the mortgage ...fortunately at that time I was working in Conveyancing, and managed to stall the repossession, He then left (guess for whom ?! ...the barmaid from the local pub where he spent all his time and a lot of money !) ...this was a blessing in disguise ....I managed to sell the house, and with the profit (which I took in full ...long story (!) I moved 300 miles away with my daughter to a town where I knew no one but could afford to buy a mortgage free house and start again !! I can't even bear to buy a lottery ticket myself ....

With my second husband, who is addicted to spending money I have now taken over all the finances and make sure we have no debts whatever ...even if it means getting shouted at because I try to stop him spending above our income ......I never knew this before but his daughter told me, when I discovered a number for the AA (not the motoring organisation !) that his late wife, her mother, belonged to their support group as her dad had been an alcoholic ! He still drinks although the doc has told him not to, but he limits himself to a few small bottles of lager a day .......my brother told me 'You certainly know how to pick 'em !

So ... you will never force anyone to reform if they themselves have no interest in doing so, unfortunately .....and, just watching last night an Ambulance programme, where a crew spent three hours with an alcoholic really made me angry ...their time could have been spent saving someone who wanted to live ......sorry, but I do agree that anyone 'suffering' from an addiction should NOT be given priorty ....it is a matter of will power and only the fault of themselves.

I saw an item on the news where someone was calling for those with large credit cards debt which they were not reducing to have all interest suspended what message does this send to responsible people who do reduce their debt?