Have you put your dreams on hold?

That's interesting theo, I thought about buying a narrowboat myself, but with DD still at school there wasn't really enough space, also I chickened out of the jobs like getting rid of toilet waste etc>! I love the idea, though, of waking up and being surrounded by water, ducks etc. Good luck to you!

Never give up on a dream... At the age of 66 I have bought a narrow boat to live on. Funny thing is I see more of family than I did before. They all come and visit me. ..I font have to do the driving any more. I bet if you moved to the seaside they will be visiting regularly. Go for it...do not live with regret that you did not follow your dream x

Thank you devongirl, still a way to go but we will get there

I agree with JanaNana --if you move house now and buy something else by the sea I would guess the costs, estate agents' fees and stamp duty could be around £10,000 to £15,000 so why don't you spend that instead on regular trips to the seaside when the weather's good and hunker down in your cozy inland home in the winter?!

I live a ten minute walk from the sea...however my family live up and down the country having moved away over the years to pursue their own lives. I miss them a lot. Buying a static caravan could be your answer ...a little escape by the sea...however these come at a price and there is the ever increasing annual ground rent that has to be paid as well. Maybe you could book a few mini breaks throughout the year ..lots of B&Bs everywhere, also caravan parks, if you choose mini breaks you could go more frequently and be by the sea more often. Once you have settled into your new home this feeling may wear off as you become more familiar with your new surroundings.

Oh how this resonates with me. I have always longed to live by the sea and it is definitely an option in the next couple of years. However - I do a lot of childcare for 3 DGC , from choice but also necessity as DD's cannot afford ft childcare so DH and I pick up a lot of it. One DD would move to be near me, other doesn't want to but as a lone parent she needs support.
I am seriously considering buying a caravan for extended periods by the sea but even that isn't ideal as DGC need to be with local friends and football teams etc or risk becoming 'out the friendship loop'
We have this one life and need to follow our dreams but on a practical level I feel there is always a compromise to be made. DH worries I will be too sad if I move away from family but also concern that I might resent thwarted plans. It's just so difficult. Not much help to you I'm afraid but can only suggest you draw up pro's and cons and 'weight them' e.g. No bus service is a 2 but missing family is a 5 etc. Good luck and I hope you are happy in the future with any decisions you make.

Sounds lovely, have a great time minxie!

Thank you Devongirl..

We are in the process of following our dream. We sold our house and possessions three years ago so we could build a house boat.
So I am sitting in my caravan as I type which sits next to our boat as she us being fitted out. Our new dream is to get her in the water and cruise the waterways, its been a long time coming

Our dream was to move to Wensleydale when we retired as we had holidayed there for over 25 years so we did it and it didn't work out. Perhaps it was the equivalent of a holiday romance. We moved down to the East Midlands and seem reasonably settled.

downtoearth, so very sorry to hear about your daughter, you sound as if you have a wonderful OH and I hope life is kind to you now, you deserve it

My 26 year marriage had broken down, my dreams of leaving materialised,I met a lovely man and we had our dreams of the life we would lead together, tragedy struck as my 23year old daughter comitted suicide and I had a choice my man or my grandaughter aged 4...luckily my lovely gentle man stepped up ( he is 20 years my juniour) and committed to us both and he is and has been a blessing and a rock to us both and times have been hard on us .14 years on our dreams for our future look no nearer than they did all that time ago my (our)beautiful girl is 18 now but work and life have blurred the edges and I doubt very much that they will happen now as financially our finances are at the least precarious due to a hefty battle for custody for E that took all of my house sale money and 10 years out of work for legal aid ....dreams now are that E has a good future ..my son is not plagued with anxiety and depression and that I live long enough abd remain healthy to enjoy what we have now

I grew up by the sea and have lived by the sea for most of my life although I have moved house eight times now. Last move was from Dover Kent to Telford in the West Midlands. I really miss the sea but my daughter is adamant she will not relocate again as she found the move (combined with a split from her ex husband) very difficult to deal with. We have been here two years in rented accommodation whilst she found her 'forever house'. I have thought about getting a part time job once all three GC are in senior school (only four years to go) and using that money to fund a holiday caravan by the sea to escape to!

* gilly, thanks for your reply, where you live sounds lovely but too cold for me! LouLou21 where do you live? - sounds like my ideal location

I lived on the Isle of Wight for 40 years and could see the sea from our bedroom window. When I retired we moved to the mainland, to the same town as our DD, SIL & GS at their request. I still love the sea but nothing the sea has to offer can compare with being close to our family and being hands on grandparents. The icing on the cake was when our DS & fiancee decided to relocate here two years ago.

Day6 if being by the sea is so important to you, then go for it whilst you still can. I would just say though that after awhile you do take the sea for granted.

Merlot Gran sorry you didn't get to move back. Having experienced the freedom of mainland life, I could never go back to living on the Island, beautiful island that it is.

Yes, I moved to the North East Coast 11 years ago from London. The beaches are empty..hoorah! as I think people see the North East as being cold and dreary...how wrong they are..the coastline is stunning. I do miss not being able to see my son as often as I would like however, but I visit him frequently and feel I have the best of both worlds. There is nothing stopping you from making another move in the mid to long term (just one last round of stress)! My aunt did it 3 times in her eighties!

And now I have to work to 68 I know how you feel Namechange2016 my retirement will be (according to recent projection) 67 years and 6 months. Whoopppeee only another 12 and a bit years to go then. By which time they will probably have moved the goalposts again.

I live a few minutes from the sea but though i love it i do feel very lonely. My family live inland about an hours drive away. I miss seeing them as can only get to them & see my GC every 3-4 weeks if i am lucky. I dont drive so have to get a cab as long bus journeys are out for me now & money is scarce when you are a pensioner on your own. Life is very insecure now having to rent after my marriage broke up but life is what it is & as my Mum used to say there are plenty people far worse off. So I just dream of having my family nearer now. Sometimes dreams do come true, you never know. Keep on dreaming!

Moving to the sea in the hope that your family will spend idyllic summers with you does not always work out. My parents did this, and we had no more desire to visit and listen to them arguing by the sea than we did in town!! We did of course visit, but probably not as often as they had hoped.

Also it is worth remembering that the GC might enjoy the seaside, but after a few visits they may want to visit France/Spain/somewhere else instead.

Can you move again?

My DH's parents moved from East Grinstead to Haxey, a South Yorks village, and never really settled. They stayed twenty years in which they were never truly happy as they had wanted to be by the sea. Towards the end of their lives when ill health had overtaken them they confessed that they had 'nearly' moved back down south to the seaside a decade before but had just given up on the idea as being too difficult and overwhelming.

We were horrified as, had we known, we could have encouraged and helped them.

The inheritence they left us was used as a deposit on a house with a sea view. What an irony.

Go for it. The dead don't have dreams.

Oh I can recommend that too Grampie (the static caravan that is). Many years ago when mine and DH's business was doing okay we had a static caravan further up the coast in an idyllic little fishing village. We didn't have this house then we lived in the middle of the city in a bigger house. When the business went a bit pear shaped (well very pear shaped) we were forced to sell up and downsize. I didn't even glance back at my house but boy did I cry for that static caravan.

Anyway I suppose things have a way of working out. We now love in a lovely little house close enough to the sea that I can hear the waves crashing when I lie in bed. We are nearer to my little family so couldn't ask for more really.

If I won the lottery I would buy my DS, DDiL and the children a small holding as it would suit them down to the ground. Then they could live "the good life" with chickens, donkeys, horses, cats, bats, rats and crikey knows what else.

When I was sixty I met someone and flew to the other side of the world to sail with him on his boat. It was fun and I have lovely memories. Follow your dream and don't live to regret things you haven't done.

I think global warming might make living near the sea less desirable or more imminent, depending where you live now. I am 10 miles inland...........could be a beach front apartment before I shuffle off this mortal coil.

I really want to be in Cornwall but making the kids travel all that way to see me would be selfish......however talking proper dreams, when Cap'n Poldark comes to fetch me................

I don't have any dreams either. I gave up my long term relationship to nurse my sick mother for many years, until she died. I have dated since but no one interests me and I still think about my ex partner. He is now married to a younger woman and has a child. I am too old to have children, too insecure and set in my ways.
I will have only a tiny pension because of all the years off work nursing my mother. And now I have to work to 68.
I just try to get through each day. Dreams are nothing but disappointments waiting to not-happen so I don't bother with daydreams.

I'm an east coast girl myself gilly but further down - in what is now known as Little London. No room for locals there. I blame the royals myself!!!