Argy-Bargy Cafe - enter at your peril ?

Come back Marydoll, put the poor man down and come and see your mates, you've got a tab to pay off if nothing else

Sorry my dear friends, I have been feeling pretty rough over the last two days , and it's not the booze
To top it all I have spent all day, trying to repair my PC. I have had to beg time on my grouchy darling husband's PC.
I will definitely pay my tab off, in fact have a drink on me. I will be back.

You haven't been looking at ahem "grown ups things" on your pc have you Marydoll ? I've been told, although obviously wouldn't know from personal experience, that looking at "those things" can BREAK YOUR COMPUTER! Come on...... own up.....

A pint of Gordons please, with a slice of lime in it.Had a busy time recently so nice to put me feet up on a bar stool again.Ah, slurp......that's good!
Like the outfit? ( does a twirl) a bit of a waste though, as my sailor boy friends are away at sea just now, but see this ( drops knickers and pulls up dress) a dragon tattoo! What do you think....too much?

Where is everybody? The place is dead, and where is Graham, bless his little ferrety face.Has he been banned for chewing up your wig?

staggers in, trips up, bangs into the door and knocks a table of drinks flying . Hey up roses, wherever have you been? I've not been drinking for the last 3 days cos I'm on antibiotics. That ungrateful little swine Geronimo bit me when I took him to be descented.

Pint of Bishop's Finger please. Where's Menopaws ? This place is a bit sticky round the edges isn't ?

Bloody hell roses, how big is that tattoo? I've seen smaller tats on a navvy! Who did that to you? You didn't pay for it did you?

Oh and incidentally, you're leopard print dress has been stuck in the back of your keks for the last hour. Or maybe you knew that already?

Well Chewey, I'm shocked that you are casting aspertions on my lily white character. The police did ask to check my hard drive, but I accidently spilled coffee on it (I don't actually drink coffee so I don't understand how it happened), As a result, they were unfortunately unable to check the contents. . I only had the firefighters' calendar pictures ( and you know how I love a firefighter) and pictures of Tom Selleck, dressed as a navy officer in his white uniform on..
I'm feeling much better, I think the hash brownies helped . I will pop in tomorrow to pay my bar bill.
By the way Roses , Gordon's!!! How boring and conventional My daughter has a gin bar in her home, she has over thirty two gins. I'll go tomorrow when she is at work tomorrow and borrow lots a few samples.

Welcome back MD! It's been so quiet in here lately. No sign of Menopaws *; I don't know if she's done a runner with the mop and bucket or got a 2nd job at a more salubrious bar. *DanniRae is on the wagon I think and Roses is still knocking on with those sailor men. And for heaven's sake don't ask to see her dragon tattoo.

Well I did think about moonlighting at the Dog and Ferret but to be honest it looked a bit like hard work and they expected me to look SMART, so I dropped that idea. Anyway on the way back I met a very nice man driving a tractor with a slurry trailer behind and I thought, this is more like it. Turns out the driver was the father of my young farmer friend, my oh my what a silver fox he turned out to be! So my apologies for the state of the place but yabba dabba doooooo! (Hope you like my new perfume, it's called eau de cowlogne)

Yay! You're back Menopaws ! I thought someone was around because I could smell your "perfume" as I came up the street. It blends nicely with the smell of ferret musk. We seem to be out of scratchings and pickled eggs. roses was in here last night, showing off her tattoos and she seemed a bit leery. Think she ate 'em. And Marydoll has been on a bender for over a week so we might need to order more gin.

I am never going to drink hooch again! I was going to stick to diet Coke from now on, but there is thread on GN about the dangers of it. Oh well, I think gin maybe healthier. I'll just stick some lemon in it and call it part of my "Five a day".
"Chewy", could you pick some up on your way home? I don't think I should drive and I'm resting before the party tonight.
Roses I managed to delete that picture of you and your sailor "friend" before the cops seized my PC, so no need to worry about it.
Menopaws, does your silver fox have a friend?

By heck marydoll, you've been on a right old bender this time haven't you? Where did you wake up this time? At least I didn't have to come and pick you up from the Seamans Mission House like last time, I suppose. roses has just sent me this photo of her new tattoo. Shall we go tog6and get the same?

I am traumatised!!!!!

Ah, but that pic of me doesn't show my new tattoo.....the dragon is on my arse!
Starts at one side and goes all the way across the buttocks....classy.

I like Gordons Marydoll and I will have you know it has taken me a good forty years of experimenting with different gins to be able to decide that.I had a brief flirtation with Bombay Sapphire but nothing beats Gordons ( are they listening? I could do with a free case of the stuff.) It has been a long and selfless quest to determine which is the best.....but somebody has to do it ,Cheers!

roses.
way too much information there!

Are your sailor friends coming in tonight? Marydoll was hoping for some company. Has anyone bumped into DanniRae lately? Not seen her propping up the bar for a while.

Roses, I was thinking of having a go at making my own gin, would you like a taster, if it is successful- or if I don't drink it all? Anyway, after the first few litres, all gin tastes the same.

Could you take a selfie of your new tattoo? Purely for references purposes, of course.

why would Marydoll be asking for a photograph of Roses rear end?

It's not her rear end, it's the tattoo, silly, Billy!
Anyway, it was you who dared me to ask!

How could she take a selfy of her own backside? She'd have to be a contortionist...(hmm, who knows?)

Perhaps one of you would like to volunteer? I can't, I'm out of the country at the moment...

The tattoo is ON her rear end Marydoll !
Ana, you on holiday?

I'm in the country, but oh so busy, trying to think of words for the paper items game. All that gin has addled my brain.

No, Baccy, just making excuses - but don't tell anyone!