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Are you judgmental?

(34 Posts)
kittylester Sun 11-Jun-17 16:18:48

A thread with a very similar title was one of the first I started all those years ago when GN was in black and white. grin

So, do you consider that you are judgmental?

I believe we all are to some extent but what influences how you see someone?

Is it their clothes, the colour of their hair, where they live, their sexuality, their intelligence, their voting inclination or something else?

Or do you see all people as being worth your interest?

stillaliveandkicking Wed 14-Jun-17 19:41:03

I'm a mixture of all of the above. I do however go with my "gut" feeling and when I get swayed to change my mind I find out 90% of the time I should have stuck with my original thoughts.

yggdrasil Wed 14-Jun-17 13:25:34

I do try to think of mitigating circumstances why people behave as they do. For example, when someone cuts me up while driving I know he is probably just an inconsiderate road hog, but it just might be that he has to get to a hospital quickly for an emergency.

gillybob Wed 14-Jun-17 07:22:16

It's hard not to be a little judgmental although I try not to judge anyone by how they look or what they wear etc. but we do come to expect people in a certain role to look a certain way. I remember meeting a top neurologist For the first time and thinking "surely this can't be the specialist" as he walked around the department in Jesus sandals and cargo shorts with a sloppy tee shirt complete with surf board logo. His hair looked like it had seen neither shampoo or a comb in years but he was (and still is) a lovely man and a great doctor.

Anya Wed 14-Jun-17 06:41:48

I know I shouldn't Morgana but I do that, especially re her at No. 10. Watching her yesterday in that grey jacket that sort of dragged across her chest. My reaction was 'haven't you got a mirror?'

Probably because men tend to wear more boring less distinctive clothes, just suits in dark colours, though I do notice their ties.

Baggs Wed 14-Jun-17 06:39:47

Somehow it feels much less offensive when looked at that way round.

No, I'm not excusing prejudicial behaviour based on judgments. Sorry, but I'm feeling the need to qualify things I say for fear of more being read into stuff than is really there.

Baggs Wed 14-Jun-17 06:37:07

I don't think that attitude is limited to women. I think a lot of men judge women on what they are wearing too. It's probably built in, just as it is t'other way round in birds. Although few people nowadays think of it as an estimate of reproductive rate, that was its original purpose as I understand it. All about survival and making copies of one's genes.

Morgana Wed 14-Jun-17 00:22:03

I wonder if we women tend to judge too much, based on what people are wearing! I do find myself thinking, or even saying ' just look what she's got on' !

LadyGracie Tue 13-Jun-17 20:07:59

I am

Willow500 Tue 13-Jun-17 17:53:23

I don't really know if I am or not. I don't make judgements about people I meet straight away although might be guilty of doing it about people on tv programs sometimes. My husband is terrible and also extremely cynical about everyone and everything - unfortunately he's often proved right hmm

Tizliz Mon 12-Jun-17 18:25:12

My OH is very judgemental and it causes lots of rows. Our daughter is always complaining to me about it. He admits he is and says he will try and at least keep quiet about it, but doesn't last long. Luckily he is not very sociable and doesn't go to the pub - he would be arrested I am sure grin.

aggie Mon 12-Jun-17 17:35:23

I think I just judged the leafleters on my antipathy to politicians , one should look at the person not the perceived expectations ?

MissAdventure Mon 12-Jun-17 17:25:39

Yes, I suppose I am. In my defence, I try not to be, and I'm certainly less so than when I was younger. I hope, anyway.

rosesarered Mon 12-Jun-17 17:20:20

Being able to sum up a person and a situation is important, so being judgemental is important to our own safety ( or could be.) You can change your mind on that on further meetings of course.

Baggs Mon 12-Jun-17 17:09:27

That's literally. How one interprets the signals is more complicated and, presumably, is based on one's personality, one's beliefs, one's political outlook, one's ethics, etc, etc, etc.

But it's still one's behaviour that matters more.

Baggs Mon 12-Jun-17 17:07:32

Signals brought to one's brain by one's senses.

kittylester Mon 12-Jun-17 16:56:53

But - what are your judgments based upon?

aggie Mon 12-Jun-17 09:21:20

Unfortunately I am judgemental ! I hate myself for it and am happy to be proved wrong . all the leaflet stuffers recently got the sharp edge of my tongue as they rattled the Letterbox and woke OH grrrrrrrrr . Even the Party I supported sad got a furious face thrust at them . I calmed down by the second Election and just shoved the Leaflets back at them with a teeth grinding grin ( think that was actually more scary )and asked them politely to not litter my hallway

grannypiper Mon 12-Jun-17 09:12:23

Of course we are, it is part of our self preservation. We make a judgment of everyone we come across,sometimes consciously sometimes not and sometimes we voice them and sometimes we dont.

Anya Mon 12-Jun-17 08:03:36

Chewbacca I think that's about how I am too. Sadly there are quite a few some who (judging (!) by comments on GN) seem to get more judgmental as they age.

Baggs Mon 12-Jun-17 07:55:01

In the end it's not what you think about someone that counts, it's how you behave towards them. And you can change your mind as far as the thinking bit goes without that affecting your behaviour.

Behaviour is what counts.

loopylou Sun 11-Jun-17 23:43:51

Probably, however hard I might try to not be so.

Chewbacca Sun 11-Jun-17 22:04:35

In my younger days, I'm afraid that I was probably very judgemental; I very much conformed to the "first impressions theory". But the older I get, the more I've taken on board that everyone has s**t going on in their lives that the rest of us have no inkling of. I'm far less judgemental about people these days, unless I see or hear about child or animal cruelty - and then I judge heavily.

whitewave Sun 11-Jun-17 21:39:19

Yes and im often proved wrong blush

M0nica Sun 11-Jun-17 21:38:04

The most judgemental are those who say they are not.

There are times when to be judgemental is appropriate,(anyone non-judgemental when they read about the conviction and sentences of famous paedophiles?). There are times when it isn't. Wisdom is knowing when each is appropriate.

Deedaa Sun 11-Jun-17 20:56:04

I am quite appallingly judgemental but I do try not to tell people what I think. Presumably most of them are thinking fairly judgemental thoughts about me too.