Child taking a present to another child's birthday party

I'm not convinced that the area dictates very much the type of party provided.

My local dgc have gone to parties at 'venues' and take a gift of around £10/£15. At their local primary school where the party circles are made up from, it is a very broad mix socially, from the higher paid to others on benefits. The fancy parties appear to be provided regardless.

In my original post I mentioned that I had asked a family member who lived abroad what they did . This family member and his wife are both professionals and have lived in the USA for many years, that is where they came across the 'bring a book' idea. They live quite modestly in order to be able to afford to live in a nice-ish area. They plan on doing the bring a book for their own child's birthday this summer and having a party - old style- in their garden. Perhaps even in the USA they are getting fed up with the OTT approach and looking back to the simple fun.

I am delighted at the positive response to the bring a book idea. It only takes a few parents to take a stand in their child's social circle and the idea could well take off.

And most likely, there would be many happy parents.

Last weekend was DGD's 10th birthday. All of us, including her parents were taken aback by how many parents just popped a £10 note in the card rather than buy a little gift. Clearly where they live £10 is the norm, although, that seemed a lot to us.

I suppose if you just want to put a bank note in a card, it has got to be £5, £10 or £20, and people think £5 looks mean.

The norm in many European countries is that the friends' mothers get tegethwr and have a collection and buy one gift that the child wants. Sounds a much better idea. A German friend was telling me how difficult she found finding suitable presents when she lived in the UK.

I can't bear how everything is so excessive these days..

the book idea is brilliant. I have 5 children and could not (or would not) 65 quid on a cake! Everything seems like its keeping up with The Joneses!!

I wasn't going to add more to this, as clearly I witness extravagance more frequently than many others.
It almost becomes the norm in some circles to be excessive, so it is neither obscene nor vulgar.
These are probably the same parents who individually give our teachers £100 vouchers, tickets to shows, expensive champagne, jewellery etc. as presents. If they can afford it, that's all well and good.

While I don't disagree with comments on here that parents should keep birthday presents simple and inexpensive, I don't necessarily think they should they should be expected to dumb down their gifts just because others might see them as extravagant.