I need a Rant

I've no helpful ideas, Hopehope, but couldn't close the page without commenting. I'm very sorry you're being put through this.

hopehope Thank goodness that GN has least given you somewhere to vent your spleen.

Wish I could help
I have in the past filled in
'war & peace forms'

Do you think it would worth another phone call tomorrow in the hope that maybe you would be able to talk to a different person (with more understanding)

Good luck

Having never gone through your experiences I can only imagine your frustration, hope it gets sorted out soon, I expect that you will just get through it when you will have to fill in his pension forms! Hope you have your gateway cards so you can do that on line. ?

So sorry to hear what you and your DH are going through at the moment Hopehope . Sometimes I wonder what planet half of these government bodies live on (it's certainly not the real world) . My family are going through hell with our local education authority so (although different situations) I can fully understand your frustrations when it appears that no one is listening or even gives a damn.

Ten months is a very unreasonable time to wait for an assessment and I agree so much can change in this time. Am I right in assuming that if assessed correctly "they" will get off DH's back, so to speak and allow him some peace? In one way it is a good thing that they will assess him based on "that day" as assessing him using 10 months out of date information would be ridiculous. It also seems so stupid that your DH is close to retirement too. I can appreciate that the stress and anxiety can often make those already in ill health so much worse.
I am sending you and your DH my very best wishes in the hope that once this is over you are left in peace.

That happened to my husband, too.
We contacted someone at Ageuk and had a retired solicitor come round to fill in the forms for us as my husband could not get to the centre. It was accepted that he could not get there under his own steam.
Can/have you contacted Ageuk?

I'm sorry you are having to go through this, too. My advice would be to talk to cab who were a brilliant help with my son. And could your doctor intervene.

Please come back and rant if you need to but let us know how things progress.

Hope what an awful situation.The only advice i have is to yell and stamp your feet then take a deep breath and remind yourself that this is the very last time you have to go through this. Goodluck and i hope all goes well.&

Hopehope I can feel my Bp rising as I read your post. I am so relieved DHis now 69 and we can put all that behind us, but the indignities of our treatment by ATOS 5 years ago (including appealing at a tribunal, which he won) were heartbreaking. Eventually a good friend advised us to appeal under Reg 29 2b (then) something like " the fact that he was suffering from an incurable disease which could not be treated with any recognised therapy " meant he did not have to go through further assessments for ESA. Two weeks after the tribunal he was admitted to hospital with sepsis and was in three different hospitals for 3 months , flat on his back, needing full nursing care, IV antibiotics etc and while he was in, they sent another assessment form! I filled it in on his behalf for the state he was in (frequently not far short of comatose) and also rang the issuing office and let rip. We heard no more and 6 months later he turned 65.
I can honestly say one of the most stressful periods of my life.

Hopehope this is all so stressful for you on top of your husband's illness. Ten months is far too long to wait for assessment, so much can change in that time. There has been some advice on here which I hope will help you.
It's good to let off steam and I sympathize with you

I am sorry to hear how awful things are for you. I personally was in a similar position. However, my consultant was very supportive and wrote a very long letter to support all the paperwork, when she saw how badly this stress was affecting my conditions. This helped enormously. I have to say, that after the letter was sent, I found that I was treated very well.
Though , I did find reading the contents very upsetting, when I read the words, " progressive" and "prognosis poor", as I hadn't accepted how very unwell I was. Do these pen pushers not realise how the added stress acerbates people's health problems and those of their carers?
It is shocking, what has happened to you.
Take care and I hope things get better for you soon.
It is OK to "rant" here. I wish I had had somewhere to get things off my chest. It is a very personal situation, and I didn't want anyone to know my business. Pity I wasn't on Gransnet then.

Why oh why do things have to "go by the book"?
Is there no room for a bit of commonsense? And also efficiency. How can things take 10 months to be sorted? The implication is that millions are applying for assessment. If this is true the country is in far more trouble than I at least realised.
About 4 years ago a man we knew had cancer and after surgery the fist sized hole in his back would not heal. He had a pump sucking out "gunk" fitted. He was asked to attend an assessmemt to declare him fit to work as his cancer was in remission.
He had to have the wound and pump attended to at least weekly. Who would have given him a job in those circumstances?

Marydoll I absolutely agree with your feelings at seeing the facts of your illness in black and white. We all know inside when something is incurable, but my way of dealing with it is to cross bridges when we come to them. Seeing it written out including the phrase "for which the only cure would be a second transplant and for which Mr Broon would not be eligible" brought it home with a bang.
I swear the stress of that period put DH back in hospital. I hope CAB can help or AGEUK.

Hopehope noticing what time you wrote your post and just wanting to add sympathy and support though that probably doesn't help much. I've heard similar stories to yours first hand and read of more. It is despicable how your husband and yourself are being treated. Kafkaesque some would say, a crazy bureaucratic system designed to be incomprehensible, intended to cover up the real agenda which is to attack and take resources from those most in need. The people who administrate the system ought to be ashamed of themselves but of course 'they're just doing their job'.

I remember a friend's daughter who had been forced onto a job seeking course related to JSA speaking about a man within 3 months of drawing his pension still being expected to complete the course that required him to complete cvs and apply for unlikely jobs miles away from his home. The course was going to finish after his pension date!!

The only practical suggestion I can make is to try and award yourself some time that gives you a break, even if tiny. When I was under a lot of stress some years ago I decided that I was going to give myself a once a month massage. You may not be able to afford that but I did it on the basis that I wasn't getting anything else, I didn't smoke or go clothes shopping, it was time for me and it was really helpful. If you like that sort of thing, there are sometimes free or reduced price options if you look around. Or whatever floats your boat and I know it's easier imagined than done.

This will pass but it's horrible going through it. Glad you found somewhere to vent. Good luck. ?

So sorry to hear of all the pressure you and your husband are being put through Hopehope.

It is disgraceful that people already experiencing the anxiety and distress of coping with a serious illness are being subjected to this.

Bureaucracy can be a nightmare, so my sympathies to you in this situation Hope hope it is all sorted out to your satisfaction.?

Please talk to Age UK or CAB if you haven't already get someone to help you. It is a disgusting system and the government ought to be ashamed of itself...........but isn't of course.

There are free advocacy services out there and you will get treated better if the powers that be are faced with an advocate who can be your witness and who knows the ropes.

I despair of the way people are bing treated.

I am truly sorry to hear of the struggles that you endure and the pain of trying to comply with a Government organisation. I am totally against the outsourcing of services - Government departments use commercial businesses to operate their systems. It doesn't work. A business contract is a black & white affair with no room for shades of grey. By that I mean that in order for these businesses to comply with the contract and the service level agreement they cannot deviate. Ridiculous situation. Outsourcing business to business works - however it doesn't work where common sense and human compassion come into play. The employees have to stick to a rigid formal format. Frankly the Government Executives that set out the system - do not know what is involved and then hand the dysfunctional system to an external party that has even less of a clue! It ruins peoples lives

My mum went through something similar and was very stressed out by it, as was I. What that manager said to you, I think, is pretty much what happens. On the days that my mum attended her appointments, the assessor told her that she'd have noting to worry about, as he could see that she was very poorly.

Good luck to you and hope you are ok this morning.

Hi hope hope
I am so sorry to hear of your situation. Wish I could help. Thinking of you and your DH. Hope it all gets sorted soon. Take care. Su66 x

It's so awful that you have had to go through such an awful time and with seeing your DH going through it as well.
I would suggest that you go to your local CAB to see if they can give you some advice as to what can be done and to confirm that in fact any payments will be backdated.
I really do hope that this gets sorted. In the meantime I think that you should go to the Doctors to discuss how YOU are feeling. Also get Social Services involved just so that you can get some help and maybe respite from all the stress.
Take care

As well as going to CAB and AgeUK as others have suggested write to your MP, it's a ridiculous system and if people complain enough,you never know things might change. Good luck.

pleased to read your rant very healthy well done
went thru a similar scene with/for my brother was successful
do fine indulgences

Oh, what a pain this is - I don't know of anyone who has ever got PIP and no-one wants to be disabled. I never got mobility DLA, but did get the care component, which I was refused on transfer to PIP (reassessment letter sent two weeks before my 68th birthday), I was lucky that I immediately claimed AA, which was a formality. DH, aged 59, severely disabled for about 20 years and more or less completely bedbound had to fight for his indefinite DLA which the Tribunal couldn't believe had been disallowed and confirmed instantly. We're expecting them to demand that he goes for PIP reassessment in about 10 years, just as he approaches pension age, which of course will be disallowed and we will have to jump through hoops yet again! DS, Aspergers, Chronic Depression, Asthmatic and having had major surgery on foot, which is never going to improve any further, although he can now walk a few yards with a lot a pain, recently had assessment interview (we had to attend an appointment which involved leaving home at 7.00 to go to a hospital about 15 miles away and having to walk a mile from the main entrance to find the disability centre! He spent the next 2 days in severe pain, unable to do anything and we had to prevent him taking a fatal dose of painkillers, feeling a total failure. We know that he will be turned down automatically, as this government has decided to refuse all PIP claims, and we will have no option but to fight on his behalf as well. As the healthiest member of the family, it all falls on my shoulders and I get so tired of it all. I do wish you both well, but would advise you if he is turned down, to apply for AA - at 65+ he won't get any mobility help, but should get £82 weekly, which is better than nothing.

It is a dreadful system. I have an illness sarcoid which nobody has heard of least of all the people who do the assessment so I have to go through loafs of paperwork and it got as far as a tribunal which we won but they never say you will have this money till your pension as I am only 60 and I don't get heating allowance or bus pass this money is needed. The stress sets off my illness which is worse so good luck I am thinking of you they forget our husbands go through it to