Photos of DGC on social media

My son used to have a fascination with flushing the toilet to make things disappear ( Lego and the like). I took a great pic of him in a nappy dropping toys into the loo and swishing it around. Imagine if that was nowadays and I posted it online then 40 years later he became a VIP Silly, but potentially extremely embarrassing.

I don't post pictures of any one in my family without their permission and would never post pictures of my grandchildren. I have very strict security on my Facebook page but that won't stop any of my friends from "liking" or sharing any photo I post for their friends to see. The is very little privacy, if any, on social media.

Even if you set your Facebook privacy settings to be the most secure you still can't stop the people you are friends with sharing a photo and beyond them you have no control over who sees a picture. Personally I never and would never post pics of my grandchildren. My daughter does (as do many of her friends) and that's up to her but they are not my children and I do not consider I have the right to share their pictures.

I usually ask them if they are old enough, or ask the parents if they are too young, and definately do not put pictures of them naked, in the bath or at the seaside etc, these days you never know, with some odd people able to access, its a shame its become like this,I love to see photos of my nieces and nephews on Facebook, as I dont see them in reality we live so far away.

This is my understanding of two possible dangers of posting pictures - there might be more:
One, a picture of a very cute child or baby could be copied and used to circulate on facebook for an appeal for funds because they supposedly have cancer or some other illness or whatever. This has been known to happen.
Two, if a person can work out the name of a young person from the post, and know the town where the poster lives (this information is available on facebook if you have put it there) then a paedophile could trace the child and approach them, call them by name, claim to be a friend, knowing various things about them, and strike up a relationship.
If you have only family and close well known friends, and strong privacy settings, it is safe, but it is unbelievable how many people's facebook pages are open to the public. Even if your page is secure, one of your friends and family ( eg teenage nephews and nieces) may have unsecure pages which (I assume but am not sure about) could show your posts to them. You can choose a setting for your posts that says 'friends only' and make sure it does not say 'friends of friends'.
Also, with modern editing apps, anybody's picture can be copied and changed and made to look different. This could lead to anything. Unfortunately It is a sign of the times we live in.

Before I retired, I was responsible for internet safety in school. We spent a great deal of time and effort educating children about not posting photos and info about themselves online. Once it is up there, it is there for ever, as these things are spread very quickly on the internet. As long as settings are private I'm ok, but many people are not aware of making sure your settings are private, or even how to do this in the first place. It's a terrible world out there and some people are very adept at using photos on social media to target children. They are very clever at gaining info by looking at background, school uniforms etc. Many people are very naive and perhaps don't realise that it is so easy to manipulate photos of children, posted online. I knew of a child 8 years old, with a Facebook account (You have to be 14), posing in bikinis, with open settings. I was horrified. I know this sounds as if I am overreacting. Of course it's lovely to be able to view your family photos online, but please keep it within the family and make your settings private.

Regarding Facebook.
My understanding is that even though you're posting your photos just for friends and family to see, if one of your friends clicks to 'like' a photo, anyone on that person's friends list will be able to see it as well.
They can then screenshot it and save it or post it on.
That's how photos can become viral.

You might think you're being careful but best to assume that if you post something online, you're happy for the world to see it.

I meant to say, good post starbird !

My daughter very rarely puts pictures of her children on facebook and I only do it with her consent, there is a great possibility of these photos being downloaded by anyone if the privacy settings are not selected properly

I think we need to look at the bigger picture (no pun intended ) Since camera's have been around there have been Bonny Baby competitions which are posted in local newspapers .Way back in the 50s /60s in they hey day of holiday camps young children were pushed up on stage to do a little dance or a song. In the grand scheme of things there is not a big difference.

Sad, to see how we rush to embrace every new stricture and paranoid thought. Why would anyone be upset if a future employer could see a photo of them on the potty as a kid ? Everyone has sat on a pot, what we are doing is pretending that our common humanity is rather private and something to be hidden..........and ashamed of.

Is an employer so empowered as to censor the every picture taken, God only know most of the big companies are mired in the worst of corruptions, how soon do we want them to have power over us?

Before you all howl about cropped photos and paedophiles ........they don't need your family snaps, they have plenty of ways of plying their evil trades, encouraged by us in many ways.

We all use phones, computers, tablets and fashions made in sweat shops by kids abused in other countries and their pictures aren't on FB. Is it just our kids that matter and their familiar faces?

I have been up all night in pain and watching documentary about child brides aged 12........in America, land of the free.........not seen anyone marching about that, and dear old, trout faced Meryl never said a word.

Why are we so selective about what abuse we will accept?

Happy Valentines Day child brides of America, I expect your faces will be on FB somewhere..don't let it ruin your career opportunites.

Craicon you can set up your security so that doesn't happen.

My DIL strictly forbids anyone posting pictures of my DGS on Social Media which has caused great angst in some quarters of the family. It can be awkward at Birthday parties or other social events but I feel rather than denigrating her for her choice, my DIL should be applauded for having consideration for her child's rights. We may sometimes moan about this generation but they often don't trample on their children's rights in the way the generations preceding them did.

It depends on the photos - in my view, they should always be tasteful (not in the bath). I never write names.
My friends love to see the photos especially those who can't see them often or at all in real life.

My elder son works in on-line marketing and he does not want his children to have an on-line presence. This does not mean we can't use modern technology to share lots of wonderful photos / videos but only on direct links between specific people.

when my eldest grandchild was born, I was told in no uncertain terms by DIL never to put any pictures of her or any other grandchildren she would produce onto FB or anywhere else on the Internet

We must be , as a family , in the minority then, looking at these posts forbidding pictures, never posting any , worrying if the children will be offended .

We have good security settings, those friends we share with have similar settings. We don't post provocative pictures but we do share in the lives of our children and grandchildren by posting photos on line.

My daughters have no issues with it, I can't believe the children will either .

Thaat is a problem when I think about it, icanhandthemback.

Does your DIL actually tell other parents they can't post photos of birthday parties if they include your GC? And expect you to do the same?

For myself, and I know I'm in the minority, I just find it weird that every aspect of peoples lives is now "shared" on social media.
I don't think anyone can know how a child will feel about it, once grown.

Posting photos and proudly showing off our dgc to the world shouldn't be a problem. Unfortunately it has the potential to be. Redpaws makes a good point about Facebook having copyright over any photos posted - I don't understand copyright well enough to know what any individuals rights are, but feel cautious as this is not the first time this has been mentioned. My son tells me that it is not uncommon for potential employers to do an internet search of potential employees - one hopes that a pic of an applicant sitting on the potty 20 years ago would be meaningless (having doting grandparents
Should not be an impediment to employment) to a potential employer but who knows!
Generally speaking I think we need to support children in the concept that they have the right to control who does what with, or to, them and this could/should include images. My dil expressed clearly that she didn't want any dgc pics posted on social media and I both agree with her and respect that wish. I am occasionally horrified by some of the pics I have seen of friends children in the bath, naked on the beach etc., and not because of any prudery on my part but solely because of the reported incidence of peadopiles getting hold of such pics. It's a sad comment on current times, but the old adage "better safe than sorry" definitely applies on this case.

I read somewhere that parents have posted pictures of their children asleep on Facebook much to the embarrassment of their offspring, as others have said, it's an invasion of privacy and I think the parent/s should consult the child before doing such a thing. Of course this is only an option once the child is old enough to understand. I have photographs on my phone of my grandchildren asleep on our sofa, but even if I were on a social media site, I wouldn't put these on it. I guess not having grown up with the internet, possibly our generation appreciates the right of the individual to be consulted about releasing an image of them which may embarrass them at a later stage.

A family, or family and friends, website is a more secure option.

My son and DIL are totally against us putting photos of beautiful grandson on FB. Whilst I understand where they're coming from, I do feel sad that we cannot share photos. I should add that occasionally their friends posts photos of him and that seems to be ok. Funny that or, am I being paronoid?

Our FB settings may be secure, but how do we actually know our friends' settings are secure? It's not about whether pictures are provocative or not. It's the whole internet safety thing.My stomach is churning reading the posts. They have brought back to mind some very upsetting memories to do with photos of children and names mentioned on Facebook accounts with no privacy settings.

If it helps with the 'privacy' debate my 25 year old daughter doesn't like anyone else putting pictures of her on social media so I do not suppose she would be happy with pictures of (potential) offspring being shared by others.

I really hate it myself when others put photos of me looking old and ghastly on Facebook.

I think it is a bit of an assumption of 'ownership' to make free with the images of others. Perhaps publishing images is so recent a phenomenon that we need a debate about it and generally to agree on a new etiquette about it.

My DH was a publisher and he says, make no mistake about it, putting images on public sites is publishing, legally speaking, and you are liable to libel laws.

Personally, I think a bit of common seense is called for. Everyone has pictures of their adored grandchildren and they have always shown them to family and friends. Still, a public website is something else.