Labelling Children

Trisher I totally agree with your post I find it incredible that people still put all our various differences down to bad behaviour bad kids poor parenting etc etc

Wake up doubters and read up instead of doubting and blaming

This thread is a bit curious to me.

To have so many posters who somewhat agree with the op, when I thought it had become mainstream and more to accept that chilrden and adults have autism, aspergers, asthma, and ADHD etc.

Perhaps there are some who shouldnt have the label? [not that I know any that shouldn't in the slightest. In fact the opposite, as I said].

I did look up late development of the left brain however[never heard of it or anyone diagnosed with it myself], and am surprised to discover the NHS dont seem to cover it, and there is nothing much on google about it that I can find.

Who diagnosed it Lisalou?

And is it a proper medical condition?

And mine knows all there is to know about lorries: how many axels they have and why some are called wag and drag. It is all terribly boring but you have to show interest.

Oh yes Swanny, I can so understand the lost glove episode, and also how people who don't know would put this down to a tantrum - as I'm sure they will on here. Does your DGS also become obsessed with some area of interest? Mine used to be a fund of information about Minecraft. He now can tell you about all the Pokemon characters in excruciating detail.

I find it extraordinary that the same ridiculous platitudes trotted out years ago are still being perpetuated by some on GN. Research into neurology and psychology has moved us on so much and given us the resources to help the children who really need it. To hear all the old chestnuts trotted out about lazy, undisciplined children and incompetent parents makes me despair. Yes there are children who don't work to their ability, yes their are parents who have different attitudes to discipline, but teachers know this and accommodate such things. To imagine that teachers can't deal with both is to devalue the profession once again. (Although with people like Lisalou in it I can understand why this happens)

Yes, thank you Anya a lot of us feel the same here, depressing isn't it, the lack of understanding and easy answers trotted out on here.A lot if us can identify with that episode Swanny been there got the t shirt ( well, the broken glasses anyway!)
I remember driving along with ( then small) GDS in his little seat taking off his shoes and throwing them at my head, ( managed to stay on the road, just.)
I shan't bother with this thread anymore, I can just tell it will get worse and worse.

Thank you Anya for your post .It was spot on.AndSwanny I can identify exactly with what you are saying.I have had a similar experience over a glove and the response of other parents.

Thank you, Marmark! I've never been to a hospice bit I nursed my darling daddy who last year died of cancer and last Thursday I had my own appointment at the Cancer Centre for follow ups on my breast cancer. I retire defeated!

Anya I am so pleased to see your post at 9.40 today. I have tried very hard since this thread started to express my feelings and failed miserably. Your penultimate paragraph did it for me.

I collect my DGS from school on Fridays to give his parents a chance to just talk, have a meal, go to the cinema, alone together or with friends for a few hours respite. He used to stay the night with me but won't at the moment so that curtails the time they have.

Yesterday he lost one of his gloves during playtime. The staff assured me they would search for it after everyone had gone and return it on Monday. They felt sure of finding it. We left the building and were crossing the playground when DGS remembered and wanted his glove. That was the only thing on his mind - no amount of explanation could get through and he flipped into a meltdown. And no, it wasn't a temper tantrum, I can tell the difference. However many of the parents of 'normal' children tutted and muttered as they passed by, but the children were asking me if (name) was alright and if we needed some help.

Together DGS and I worked through it and were able to continue with our Friday routine of going to the library to choose a DVD to watch.

Hi Lisalou

You say you are a teacher, in which case I find it outrageous that you are discussing one of your pupils on an open Internet forum. Whatever happened to respecting privacy! You say:

"I just had one child diagnosed with late development of the left brain and I feel frustrated. The boy started the school year doing zilch and getting bad marks, with a lot of help and support, as well as a strict approach to homework and study, he has come a long way. I can see him now slipping back as he is justified. Poor boy, that explains his laziness, cocky attitude and the downright lying about homework. "

As a teacher I would have hoped you wouldn't go out and discuss private matters!!

Lost for words!

Heaven forbid I should have a stupid opinion you disagree with.
I thought this site was all for that.
Discussion,that's the word isn't it?
Please be aware you may encounter people with a smaller brain than yours on this site.
Tolerance may be called for.

Not quite straight Anya,more like brow beating and refusing to accept other people's opinions.
Most people are aware of children with special needs,and most of us know a child with special needs,
If,as some believe these things are on the increase,then that is another topic for discussion,Why.the answer to that could be[in my very humble opinion] because a label Can be applied giving an excuse.
Not in any way saying this applies to most.

To all those who really do have a child suffering with some condition or syndrome that needs help I really am sorry. Life is hard on parents as well as children. They are not spongers or lazy people, they are people who are trying to cope with problems most of us could not even imagine. I take my hat off to them. They deserve a medal because everyday is a struggle and it lasts a life-time. They need support and understanding not insults or criticism.

Reading all these posts I get a visual of lots of children sitting at their desks, all with a cardboard label hanging from their neck with the name of the 'syndrome' 'condition' (call it what you like) on the card.

Imo children are children. Some may be bright, some active, some not so bright, some not so active, some timid, some bold some gentle some bullies. Oh, no, I have put another label round their necks now!

For those who genuinely need help then thank goodness there is help available for them. However, just remember once that label is put around their neck ie on their record, it will stay with them throughout their whole life and they will have to live with it. Be careful not to be quick to put them in someone's database. Let them just be children with all their faults and failings. Life is hard enough I think.

Thank you Anya for your last post. I felt very hurt by some of these comments on here. I tried to be honest by explaining what had happened to my GS, and the implication that his parents were failures (they have 2 other children who are functioning normally and all 3 are polite, well-behaved), or that they are in some way after money and that this is just an excuse for bad behaviour, was like a kick in the stomach!

Let's get one thing straight.

This thread started off contentiously. It insulted the teaching profession (of which I was a member) and it insulted children with specific problems (which my GS1 has).

Many people have reacted strongly to such lack of understanding. We have tried to inform and educate those who do not understand because they have either never experienced this first hand, or in the case of the OP, suggest she has more compassion and understanding of the children she castigates.

This has been met, by just a few, with a complete disregard for those who are struggling to explain how their lovely grandchildren are already suffering from this lack of understanding and how it is affecting their life chances. We care about these children. We care very much. These little people mean a lot to us and when we see their problems dismissed as just 'lazy' or their parents dismissed as 'poor parents' then it is so way off the mark it makes my blood boil.

So be careful who you consider the 'nasties' in all this. Those who are at the heart of this situation or those who are saying it's all a big excuse.

Good grief,out come the nasties,
Now there's a definite increase in them.
Now here's a cure,visit a hospice.

Radicalnan,they come from the same place as the transgenders,ridiculous,no wonder there's so many kids in therapy.
Yes,I know there are genuine cases,of course I do.BUT.

I couldn't give a damn about your feelings Josie - as you obviously don't about others you have offended on this thread.

I'd say that 'a little learning is a dangerous thing'

I do agree with Josiebear on the issue of asthma. In 2015 the Guardian reported "NICE said studies showed that up to 30% of the 4.1 million people treated for asthma in the UK did not show any “clear evidence” of the incurable condition and may be receiving unnecessary treatment." I also recall reading some years ago that the treatment of mistakenly diagnosed asthma actually exacerbate and perpetuate asthma-like symptoms and so what was originally a problem that would have resolved itself ends up being a chronic condition. Again some years ago, I remember seeing a programme which put forward the idea that mild asthma or asthma-like symptoms could often be alleviated by regular breathing exercises. Many of these alternative approaches, which may be helpful in dispensing with the need for long term medication or help to reduce the dosage and frequency of medication, have not really been properly researched.

I don't think anyone is suggesting that there aren't properly diagnosed cases of asthma that require medication but I have concerns that medication is given too readily for lots of conditions that possibly don't need it - perhaps in order to satisfy patients that "something is being done".

I realise it's off the subject because we were talking about behavioural and learning difficulties, but it still relates to whether medication should be prescribed so readily without other approaches being looked at. I suppose the problem is that GPs and other medical professionals have very little time in which to investigate fully and to try other approaches.

Thank you, Anya, a personal attack is always welcome! I do try to gauge my opinions on the back of different information I have gleaned. I have a wide breadth of knowledge so please don't presume to tell everyone what I do or don't know!!

That should be empathising not emphasising

My grandson is not disabled Josiebear. He is on a point of the autistic spectrum which means he has problems coping with unstructured situations and also emphasising with other people. We are all somewhere on this spectrum - I, for example, like to plan ahead and feel uncomfortable if I don't have some idea of what I'mean going to do.
As for people not having this in the 70s and 80s, that's simply not true. I could show you people who went through school at that time - and from various countries - who exhibit very clear signs of autism. Most of these were lucky enough to cope because they were academic enough to survive - others would have been abandoned by the system as troublemakers in 'sink' classes

Agree Anya, I read it in the same way I do when someone says 'I call a spade a spade'. It's another way of saying they give themselves permission to be rude or offensive to others