Are you doing EXACTLY what you want at Christmas?

That's nice, far north, I'd like to be like you.

Yes, a big family Christmas. We all muck in so no one is left with all the work. Love it and consider our selves very lucky that we all want to be together. 10 months old to 85 year old.

I remember having a lovely day last year, on my own, beans on toast for Christmas dinner

It's never EXACTLY what I want, because that would mean someone else missing out on their perfect day... so it's got to be about finding a compromise that's gives everyone i.e. 5 adult children, 8 grandchildren and various in laws enough but not necessarily all of what makes for their idea of a good time. It's never simple and I fear life as an only child was poor preparation, a course in negotiating skills would have been more useful !!

I had a great Christmas with my late father. He had planned to be at ours, but became too frail. My mother- in- law offered to provide dinner ( I use the term loosely!) for the Bodach and the children. Meanwhile, Daddy and I dined on M& S finest on trays on our knees, watched really bad telly, and tanned a bottle of Southern Comfort!

I would like to go to miller Howe for Christmas but we are having the sofa bed option at dd2 and SIL . The other grandparent will be there and is rather sad and bitter so we've decided to kill her with kindness love bomb her call it what you will but we are going to try.

I shall be on my own at Christmas and am fine with that. I am looking forward to it.

Not 100% what I would choose though.

Exactly? Nope! Good enough? Oh yes. In fact probably the best it has been for some years. Wishing you all the best Christmas it can be.

Yes! Everyone will be home with their respective families and I will be left in peace! I'm mulling over what kind of Christmas I want. My favoured option at the moment is a greasy pepperoni pizza and champagne for lunch while marathoning episodes of Frasier. One things is a cert - not a single brussel sprout will cross my threshold this month...

Not having Christmas here , we always have nice meals so don't feel the need to follow suit and have what most people consider to be the norm for Christmas. The only thing I will do differently is to take the day off work.

No.

I'm really happy with Christmas this year we are going to one daughter for Christmas dinner just 4 of us then late afternoon most of the grownup grand children and my other daughter are gathering at eldest Grandsons for our Secret Santa gifting and a buffet/tea it will be a madhouse and every time you vacate your seat someone else will jump in it
Boxing day we are at home just the 2 of us BLISS! The only thing I will miss is the little grandchildren and great grandchildren as one is abroad and the others are with their other families for Christmas.

Not exactly what we wanted, which was a cottage near the coast for DH, myself and the dogs (long walks on the beach, jacket potatoes and steak, a few visits to a pub). However, happy to have youngest son staying, and also my sister. Christmas dinner will still be the buon-traditional though - they have been warned!

Cave house in Spain with sky and wifi!!

Several years ago SIL gave DH a bottle of Posser's Rum and they drank most of it between them after lunch. They both went to sleep and the rest of us spent the afternoon watching whatever we wanted on TV. Brilliant

I'm doing my usual Christmas, which means me cooking for 3 DS, 2 DGD and this year son's girlfriend as well. I like seeing the children's excitement and it's nice that everyone wants to be with me but, having done Christmas dinner since 1979 when my mother died, I'd love to be invited somewhere else and not have to cook just once.

I was going to have Christmas on my own, with my pets, but my son put the emotional thumb screws on and so he has landed today, with some washing and no presents, as yet. He was emotional for about five minutes, then cracked a can and sat talking about himself then for the rest of the evening!

I will get snippets of time on my own, I'm at the doctors in the morning, (lucky me!) so that's an hour on my own. Then I might sneak off and have breakfast somewhere.

It's going to take some adjusting, treating him as an adult now with a life elsewhere. As long as he respects me and my space, then he'll be ok.

I gave him a card with one piece of currency in circulation now, amounting to £88.88. I told him it was all he was getting but, as normal, Father Christmas has got him a lovely gift or two, one of them being a 81 key keyboard and padded bag for him to take it back in. I hope he likes it. Another is Donald Trump toilet paper, he won't like that!

grannyqueenie you raise an interesting point I hadn't thought about. Yes, life as an only child doesn't really equip us very well for large family occasions and sometimes we over compensate for that when hosting our own events. I'm so lucky to be surrounded by 10 or 12 family members in our house at Christmas, I run myself rugged and strive to make everyone else happy. Maybe if I'd come from a big family I'd have learnt how to ignore or accept the awkward behaviour that sometimes comes with a lot different personalities, instead of which I feel I'm going to be on tenterhooks waiting to smooth over any disagreements.

We enjoy Christmas on our own, children and grandchildren all grown up now and doing their own thing. We will be joined this year by friends who can't get back to UK as he is in the middle of a course of chemo. Can't make up for them missing their family but they can relax without cooking etc.

Can't decide whether I would like to toast my toes in front of a roaring fire in a small Cotswold hotel or toast all of me in a sunny hideaway!

So agree with grannyqueenie, sometimes think I would negotiate all aspects of this grandparenting lark with less worry if I had been part of a large family. There was always just the three of us, our children have married into huge, close and very animated families with their own traditions and systems. I sometimes feel as if I'm drowning and yes, a course in negotiating would have been and would still be so useful! Still, this Christmas will be absolutely fine, we have been thought about and included enough for us, it works out in the end so maybe I just need to quit worrying and let the others do the negotiating.

Yes, I'm having the family Christmas that I want. I'm glad that my SiL is still around and able to have Christmas with us. He might well have been called back to work on his ship. The DGC love having their daddy at home. I hope it will all be good.

No I'm not doing exactly what I want. Ideally, both my children and their spouses and our DGS would be at our house having a big family Christmas. However, DS, his wife & son have flown out to the Canaries today for Christmas & DD & SIL are spending the festive period with his parents. So...DH & I are off to a hotel for 3 days. I'm sort of looking forward to it & sort of dreading it. It just won't be the same!

We are going away to a cottage and will not be celebrating Xmas but will be drinking lots of champagne. Just what we want to do

My Grandson is at his fathers every Boxing Day so I can only see him on Christmas Day so I will go to my DD however my DH has decided that he wants to go to his DD for Christmas Day this year he was invited for either day but wants to go Christmas Day if he had gone on Boxing Day we could have both gone as we have done in previous years. Up until 3 years ago when we downsized everyone used to come to us. I am disappointed that we won't be spending the day together and that I will not see any of my DHs family at Christmas, but if I go with him I won't see my DD or GS so no choice really. I'll just add that we all live quite far apart.