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taking shoes off

(235 Posts)
Bobbin Fri 04-Nov-16 13:41:39

The other day, my DH and I went for dinner at a friend's house with two other couples, so eight of us in total. They're fairly new friends as we've not long moved to the area, so it was the first time we'd visited their home.

It was a nice dinner party, so I wore a nice pair of shoes, tights and a dress. Then when I got there, my friend asked us both to take our shoes off and we went padding about in stocking feet (well, me anyway grin) as did the other couples.

my questio is, do you make guests take their shoes off if you're hosting something similar?

Spindrift Sat 05-Nov-16 11:55:15

Quite the opposite actually, I belong to a coffee group, we have the meetings in each other's houses because of the number of us it only comes round once a year, some ask us to take shoes off & others just look at our feet lol I on the other hand say keep your shoes on if you want to & every one of them has said they feel more comfortable here than anywhere else lol

allule Sat 05-Nov-16 12:00:30

One workman who came here popped on a pair of the blue plastic overshoes used at swimming pools.
Perhaps these are a good solution, if a selection could be kept handy?
It would save visitors the bother of removing their shoes, and be easy to take off again if they wanted to go in the back garden.
Having thought of this, I shall now see if I can find them on sale....

GrammaYvonne Sat 05-Nov-16 12:01:59

I would never ask anyone to take their shoes off at my home except I might offer slippers to a stiletto wearer who could spike my wooden flooring, but appreciate if they do, and always offer to do so when visiting others - I keep a pair of knitted slippers in my handbag when visiting. I don't wear outdoor shoes inside myself - I lie on our floor to watch television and to exercise, my grandbabies crawl about on my carpets, and I don't particularly want them in contact with whatever I've been walking in out on the street. And yes we have oatmeal coloured carpets. We have however put mats down from front door to kitchen diner which has hard wood floors we can easily clean and disinfect.

Llamedos13 Sat 05-Nov-16 12:33:43

I live in Canada and it has always been the custom here to remove ones shoes, in fact I find it peculiar NOT to remove them.Just think of what ones shoes have walked in!!!This is a custom like many north american customs which should be adopted in the UK.

codfather Sat 05-Nov-16 12:38:29

As "Spuds" seem to appear at spurious times during the day, I prefer to keep my shoes on.

When I'm at home in the evening and not expecting to have to go out again, I change into slippers! Wife does tend to have a go at me but I just can't be bothered to keep changing shoes all day.

Anya Sat 05-Nov-16 12:46:35

Spuds confused

sunnymartin Sat 05-Nov-16 12:48:08

In my family it is good manners to only wear outdoor shoes outside and indoor shoes or slippers indoors.

i keep some folding slippers in my bag so I can change into them if I find myself invited in

Candlefran Sat 05-Nov-16 12:50:04

I think 'spuds' means holes in socks.

Candlefran Sat 05-Nov-16 12:53:08

disposable overshoes

Good for workmen, but perhaps not for dinner guests. smile

dollyjo Sat 05-Nov-16 13:01:14

I keep a very cheap pair of slippers that fold into handbag size with me and 'pop' those on when I am visiting. They are washable too.I got them from Sainsbury's
My son and his family always remove their shoes - I think it is a means of showing respect. Yet when other people visit, I always say, "You don't need to remove your shoes, we've got dogs who poddle in after walks." Never thought about this anomaly before.

Anya Sat 05-Nov-16 13:03:19

Thanks Candlefran never heard that before.

SeventhHeaven Sat 05-Nov-16 13:03:55

As a family we take off our shoes in the house, on carpeted floors, for hygiene purposes. For guests, I think the best thing to do is to provide disposable slippers, such as those you get in hotels. Close friends and family obviously won't mind padding round in stockinged feet, but it's not very polite to ask guests you don't know well to do so.

Candlefran Sat 05-Nov-16 13:05:28

I haven't heard it in years Anya. Just rang a bell. smile

Jalima Sat 05-Nov-16 13:09:26

Yes, spuds are holes in socks.

as well as potatoes!

The men who delivered some furniture wore those blue overshoes - I was very pleased because we had a new carpet and it was a wet day.

We have been offered them in some NT houses.

GrammaH Sat 05-Nov-16 13:10:50

We live in a farm down a long drive but I would never insist on shoe removal although most people do take outdoor shoes off as we have a cream carpet in the front room. Our daughter has a strict 'No shoes'policy as do our closest friends. Doesn't worry me a bit

Candlefran Sat 05-Nov-16 13:11:07

Trouble is, we have a polished wood staircase, and I can just imagine workmen going a--- over tip. shock

Candlefran Sat 05-Nov-16 13:12:47

Becoming too neurotic about things like dirt and germs can lead to very sad situations. It's very hard though, if you are naturally a bit OCD.

Esspee Sat 05-Nov-16 13:29:43

No it's rude to traipse your dirty outdoor shoes over carpets which cannot be washed daily. If it is a hard floor then no problem.

Grannygee Sat 05-Nov-16 13:30:05

I am always in a quandary with this shoe removing thing. If we go out dressed up in the evening I think slippers really looks daft so I usually try to take a pair that I slip into when we get there. But I'd be offended if our host asked us to remove our shoes. It's just not a good start to the evening!
I wouldn't dream of entering someone's house with muddy or dirty shoes anyway and I'd hope everyone would be the same without being asked.

In the old days we all walked in with shoes on so long as they weren't muddy. Cleanliness wasn't so precious then and we're still here! They say people are too clean and its led to all sorts of allergies as we've reduced our immunity to bugs.

As I said I'm still here and it was one bath a week and we only changed our socks and pants every day! There speaks a '56 child. wink

hapgran Sat 05-Nov-16 13:51:42

I hate being asked to take my shoes off (unless shoes dirty obviously)- I mean I'm only going to put my feet on the floor not the table, worktop, chair etc...

notanan Sat 05-Nov-16 14:08:05

I never ask but I'd say about 90% of guests do this automatically, if they don't I don't mind - I still have children at home so any hope of a pristine carpet is long gone LOL, and we always take off our shoes when visiting.

I think it is the done thing

notanan Sat 05-Nov-16 14:11:00

Becoming too neurotic about things like dirt and germs can lead to very sad situations.

I don't think it's anything to do with germs, I do think leaving your shoes on indoors is like leaving your coat on when you visit - gives "I don't want to be here long" vibes.

I don't wear shoes indoors in my own home, I am absolutely not neurotic about germs, shoes an outdoors thing to me, I love kicking off my shoes when I get in.

Taking your shoes off is friendly and familiar

GrandmaMoira Sat 05-Nov-16 14:12:24

I never go barefoot indoors and feel quite uncomfortable without something on my feet. I would hate to be asked to remove my shoes at someone else's house. It would feel like being asked to undress and wear pyjamas instead of normal clothes. Obviously if someone has particularly muddy or dirty shoes it would be polite to remove them but living in London this is unlikely.

LizRhodes Sat 05-Nov-16 14:29:16

When I saw the heading, I wondered what on earth it could be about. Guests who don't clean the bath, make passionate noises late at night, get very drunk? No - not taking shoes off. Surely it is polite to see what your hosts do and act accordingly. You could always provide airline-type mules for those who fee uncomfortable with their bunions showing.

LesleyC Sat 05-Nov-16 14:29:53

Wouldn't dream of asking anyone to take their shoes off, although some people do it automatically. I always think their houses must be a bit sterile if they are so fussy. I was asked to do this once and my feet were frozen. I wish I'd had the courage to ask if I could borrow a pair of slippers.