Gransnet Xmas Panto.

I'll volunteer for narrator, that way I can sit down at the front of the stage. As long as there aren't huge passages to read out or I'll get out of breath and someone will have to give the kiss of life!

Can I be the Wicked Witch of the West? I promise I'll train the wart on my chin to sprout hairs, practise my almost perfect cackle up until performance night, and I'll buff up the cauldron with black lead. Oh, go on....pleeeeeeaase

I'd be anything in the panto except the female star (toooo old) or the back end of anything be it a cow, a horse, a reindeer etc.,that person just doesn't get paid enough.

nor mine (in my udderstudy role)

I do hope there's only one cow in this panto. You are not flapping my flank, wobblybits !

I'm all for a bit of thigh slapping, whose ?

I want to be a principal boy or a Pantomime Dame, one of the ugly sisters or the Fairy Godmother.

Oh oldgaijin I want to be pricipal boy and slap my thighs! I have the boots (not actually principal boy boots, just sort of suede ankle boots) so perhaps there could be two principal boys? Or if others want to do it there could be loads of us?? What fun!!

Whatever is the final choice, could there be an Old Tyme Music Hall segment so I could get to sing "One of the ruins that Cromwell knocked about a bit"? Or I also do a rather fine "Burlington Bertie" .

It is perhaps only fair to point out that it was Tessie O'Shea, known as Two ton Tessie who made the song popular.

annsixty Thanks for the willowy - I'm not as slim as I used to be but my BMI is still good Just saw your post as I popped back home for a coffee and GN snack before going out again (busy day today). I'd love to do the song with you as the 'glamorous grans' sisters

Annsixty, just download music, no problem playing that. I wonder if I record the Uku track if you could re-record the lyrics over it.

www.tontonremy.com/ukulele/partoches/vintage/page55/page56/page57/page57.html

Only if Lynda Snell is directing.....

Of course you can be my udderstudy understudy Crafting but be warned there will be an awful lot of dress rehearsals !

gillybob . Please can I be your understudy for the backend of the Bradcow?

I am a bit short and round (tubby) so couldn't be a tall willowy tree like swanny but could I could be a shrub or a pot plant perhaps!

I have just googled Nobody loves a fairy and utube have a video with ukulele accompaniment. Shall I send for the music wb? Ideal for you.

Happy to slap my thighs...There's plenty of them!

Will you do it with me then?
If you are tall and I suspect willowy, I am short and fat and we would make an ideal couple. We could double up as "glamorous " sisters rather than the ugly variety.

annsixty I do love that song and it's ideal for a GN panto

Ooh some brilliant ideas here; hope they don't all fizzle out by Fireworks Night Can I be a tree? I'm not good at projecting my voice, so don't really want a speaking part, but I am tall so could stand at the back and wave my arms around

Hope the seats won't be too expensive as I've already bought tickets for Hackney Empire panto for the family We were worried DGS would not cope with the noise from a theatre full of (mainly) children but booked a box for a production earlier in the year and he loved it, so I've got the same for the panto.

A wind up wobblybits?

I know I have a very active imagination but charcoal knickers to absorb farts are a step too far even for me !

Nonna find one strong enough? Then definitely.

I honestly thought the charcoal underwear was a wind up (note play on words there), just seen their web page. Who the hell tests them ?

Gillybob This is to be a family show.

Would you swoop in on a wire annsixty?