Disgusted at daughter's cold heartedness.

There are two sides to every story maybe the impact of walking away and leaving them with their father as teenagers was bigger than your friend realised whatever it is seems to have affected both children
I once had a friend who to all intents and purposes was a lovely lady we all liked her she had five children and none spoke to her so something major must have happened for all five to turn their backs on her and she was the common denominator perhaps she wasn't always the lovely lady we knew

You cannot generalise about a large group of people from one sad case. From working with elderly people to reading Gransnet, I have found that for every case of rifts between parent and child, there is a story of the devotion of children to their parents and the lengths they will go to help their parents.

I agree with you wholeheartedly JBF. You have spoken my thoughts and the thoughts of everyone who knows of the situation. The daughter is a selfish brat who needs to grow up and think of someone outside herself.
Unfortunately the news of my friends tests are not good. She has a big operation and further tests ahead.Her children could not care less.Despite all this she loves them both so much.

There are, I know,two sides to the story and I do not know everything. The first ten years the relationship between the children and their mother was fine. They had some fantastic dream holidays together all over the world, just the three of them.
She has been a fantastic mother and does not deserve to be treated like this.She will be strong and with the support of all her friends she will pick herself up and carry on.She has no choice. They have and have made it, they obviously don't want a mother.

Sad world.

Nothing can be less complicated than the fact that your mother is your mother. And an adult should be able to put the past behind them and show some kindness.

Could you let your mum lie ill in a hospital bed and not go to see her? No matter what happen d in the past.

Selfish brat who needs to grow up and think of someone outside of herself.

I agree with the previous posters, only one side of the story here. You say it's nothing serious, however the fact that her son has had no contact for the last six years would be pretty serious in my book. She left her children and even though they were almost adults it seems to have impacted upon them greatly. It's a very sad situation but maybe the children feel that they were rejected at a very vulnerable time in their lives? I doubt that after 17 years that bridges can be rebuilt. I really don't think her children are being cold hearted, as now parents themselves they must reflect on their own mothers decision to have left them all those years ago.

Yes, I agree. However close the friendship, you only know one side of things and families are complicated!

As I've got older I've learnt to keep an open mind on all family/ relationship breakups.

Not knowing all the facts, who can say?
Certainly there are adult children, who had a pleasant upbringing, and yet even so, ignore their parents, and those who feel conflicted between their Parents after a break up, and those who consider ( rightly or wrongly) that they just don't like their own parents, so won't bother about them.Your friend, while keeping channels open to her DD, must accept things the way they are, her DS on the other hand, has already made his mind up about the relationship he has ( or doesn't have) with his Mother.
It's sad, yes, but once she has done all she can to keep in touch, she will have to rely on good friends (like you.)