In pursuit of that elusive thing ...happiness !

I would hate to have nothing but contentment. Please let a bit of happiness pop up from time to time.

What a very apt comment Jingle If we didn't have some sadness or worry we would have nothing to gauge happiness against.

There's some lovely comments on here, namely Soops and linscos. Inspiring!I'm happy at the movement because my toothaches subsided. Also, these days, I'm reminding myself to be grateful for what I do have. Still get unhappy though....it could be genetic or due to past occurrences.

You could be right Jingl I do think people veer towards with 'glass half empty' or 'glass half full' .

I think it takes bad times in your life to enable you to appreciate those little moments of pleasure and contentment.

Recently went through a perfect storm of crises (major). I felt so stressed as everyone was wanting me to be their rock. One sunny day I took the dog for a walk through our local forest park. The sun was streaming in through the trees. The dog was bouncing along wagging her tail and stopping every so often to give me an adoring look, and suddenly I felt a huge sense of well being. A mindfulness moment

Yes, I think my definition of happiness is really, in my life anyway, being content. I am content with what I have, my DH, our family, our health. I don't think in my personal life I would want more.

Being a half full or half empty person is a facet of character that is within you.

I am a half full type of person and I am also an optimist. I assume those two things are related.

Being happy/content is not a choice we make but a state of mind that we should be grateful to possess.

I completely agree with jings that happiness is mostly down to luck . How can anyone struggling with poor health, depression, money worries etc. possibly feel happy?

I remember even when I was a child I was a worrier and there always seems to have been something (or often several things) going on that spoilt even the smallest chance of happiness. These days I sometimes can't even raise a smile. Miserable cow that I am .

gillybob wanted to respond to you but can't think of anything to say that doesn't seem trite or patronising. So will send some virtual (both trite and patronising!) Like it that you still have a sense of humour even though it's against yourself.

KatyK I think I relate to your post I don't really understand happiness I ve probably only had that huge wave when the kids were born and I don't consider I ve had a horrendous life but happiness has been pretty elusive I would say I have much more worry and difficulties than contentment I am a positive person or else I would have gone down the pan long ago but I m not laid back unfortunately and try as I might I have never learnt to live ' in the moment'

I also don't agree that it's necessarily down to life choices often those choices are WELL out of our control and Nature/God or whatever decides what we are given ... I was always told we get what we can handle I wish I was a bit less 'able' then

There is certainly an element of luck in happiness..who our parents are is not a choice anyone can make,so if we are blessed with loving and good enough parents who have an OK income that is luck! If we are born with a set of genes that keep us generally healthy in body and mind that is another bit of luck. There are other things that individuals cannot control or choose but I do think outlook /attitude is a choice for many people. Rich and healthy people can be miserable & vice versa. I had two friends who both had terminal illnesses but whose outlook was upbeat and positive before they were ill and they continued to 'live happily' until they died. I do not say they were never sad or angry or did not have regrets but they did not choose to let that emotion dominate or define their lives.

We all know people who cannot help but make a negative comment about anything! They make a choice to say those things and to be negative! We all feel like that on occasions but I've met some people who, I feel, quite enjoy being the martyr or being 'professionally' miserable. Equally there are those interminably cheerful people who occasionally you want to throttle!

I think positivity or negativity or worrying are all down to either genetics or nurture or both and again not necessarily our fault I would love to be carefree laid back unworrying but I m not and I can't really change it

I would have to disagree BlueBelle I think we can make conscious decisions on how we respond to things even if it is against our 'nature'. I do think that there are natural worriers and those who get into habits of behaviour due to circumstances but I strongly believe it is possible to change. I do know people who have done so.

well it is hard to be content when every time you get your fingers back on the top of that pit some b****r stamps on them again.( figuratively speaking of course). Good job I am a fighter albeit an exhausted one

I think it you feel you have to pursue happiness, you won't find it. Anyway, I don't think it's possible (or perhaps even desirable) to be happy all the time but, in my experience, there are those lovely, often unexpected, happy moments. (I could do with a few more of them though!)

I've had illness for the past four years and if I took notice of it all the time I would really have been in a bad place for a long time. It's a state of mind, happiness. Finding something to be grateful for, regardless of what else is going on in your life. I have a lot to be sad over this year, but I have a beautiful loyal doggie, a son who occasionally runs around after me, I have a lovely home and comfort, food on the table and Corrie on later, what more could I want? If I chose to I could be snarling all the time, but I have today, it is a gift, so I will have it happy rather than grumpy. (Although now I am feeling a little Sleepy and if I don't get some rest I will be seeing the Doc! )

Also, I was very happy flirting with a 37 year old on Saturday in a Pet store!

He was a man, not a dog.

Good for youRuby

Thank you for the Jomarie . They really did make me smile. I had a peaceful day in the garden yesterday ( my favourite kind of day) but couldn't enjoy it for worrying about work today which is typical. Why does this happen? it's as though my own thoughts are out to spoil any tiny chance of happiness I might have .

Penstemon I agree that you can work on your personality but you can not really change your underlying person If you talked to any of my friends i m absolutely sure they would describe me as a happy, confident, full of life, chatty person a fighter who's a doer but that's not the real me at all that is the outer person I have fought to be all my life the real me worries, is deeply self critical, is shy, self conscious, all the time fighting to override my own negativity and it's blooming hard work

I am totally contented with my materialistic life I have really very little compared to most but I have very few needs or wants. I never envy others goods or items or money but what I don't have is contentment in myself about what I ve had the opportunity to achieve, about who I ve been, what I ve done

Life has not been a bowl of cherries, there is a saying that you make your own opportunities in life but I think that is not always true, sometimes you can, but equally in most you are restricted by conditions around you sometimes you can be taken into a turbulent sea and have to swim against the current and get NOWHERE whereas the next person swims straight into a calm ocean and floats.

I can be in a happy situation and seem on top of the world but without inner belief, and inner contentment, it is all superficial and 'pretend' I don't think anyone who knows me would call me anything other than a happy person which shows I ve done a good job on the outside

Happiness is being positive and enjoying what and who are.around you.

Being an optimist is a help. " The difference between the optimist and the pessimist is.droll. The optimist sees the doughnut, the pessimist sees the hole. " I think it was Walter Gabriel who said that.

A sad post on a thread about presents, someone said they had never received anything nice. Surely not. I still have funny odd.notes on envelopes from my GC telling me they love me. To a certain extent happiness is in the eye of the beholder. I hope this doesn't sound smug.

Making the most of what you have and being content with it is a kind of happiness, but sometimes there is a moment of true HAPPINESS, which probably doesn't last that long, but it will just come along and make the day special, and possibly make your cry. That is what makes life such a roller-coaster.

My glass, well I keep it half full but some one keeps knocking it over ! I think there are different degrees of happiness and it all depends on how content you are, some are content with a little, some need a lot to feel content.

I have 2 routes to happiness. The first is seeing everything as a gift and being thankful for it, even a raindrop on the window pane.
The second is to take control of your own happiness and not to say it/he/she doesn't make me happy. It's no-one else's job!

Happiness can be so elusive, anxiety and sadness one day, great joy the next. I find that happiness is often partnered with the ability to laugh at the most inconsequential happenings in life, but also happiness stems from accepting the beauty of what is around us everyday