Shorthand for 60 something

Very few people who refer to their elders as 'elderly' are actually as old as the people they're wring about. Reporters and feature writers, hospital consultants, junior doctors, GPs, even politicians these days, are all wring in a professional capacity and by definition are not retired. I know that when I was in my thirties I did not question the use of the word 'elderly' to describe people in their 60s as often as it was used for people 30 years older than that, just as when I was three, I knew my Granny was 'an old lady' even though she was only 59. It's all relative.

The proliferation of euphemisms simply reinforces the perception that there's something wrong with being old. To take just one example, of course I'm 'older' but I was older when I was a day old, from the point of view of a baby born on the following day. If people talk about 'older people', they never mean 12-year-olds in a soft play centre, do they - they mean people whom they're making a point of treating with what they think is respect by glossing over the fact that they're ... well, 'old'. And saying that someone is old is perceived to be insulting ...

No, I prefer to call myself old, and to do my bit to reclaim the word as at least merely descriptive, and as a bonus, as a term of respect. I'm very pleased to have survived to be 66 and I'm enjoying life, and on days when I have lots of energy, 66 feels like this, and when I feel tired and sluggish, 66 feels like that, too. So no big deal.
Mind you, there are limits even to my equanimity: I'm only 5 feet tall, so it would be entirely accurate to describe me as a 'little old lady' I would seethe inwardly, but that's because I know it's a cliché that also includes all sorts of disrespectful or thoughtless connotations. And I am determined to visit a restaurant in Edinburgh described by the reviewer in The List as serving delicious desserts which are 'not safe for grannies'. Plum and pistachio crumble? Bring it on!

My DM once referred to my next door neighbour as 'that elderly lady'. She was 49!

petalmoore I agree we don't need euphemisms and anyway, whatever you call someone of any age, people will always form a picture that fits the perceived stereotype if they know the number. We are discouraged from promoting gender stereotypes or racial stereotypes so older people should also be given the same respect. At the same time, we should alter our perception of what numbers mean in terms of age. Ageism is rife but it's often perpetuated by older people themselves who restrict their lives by conforming to society's ingrained ideas about age. Forget the number! Get out and do things and, above all, be seen doing them. Don't become invisible!

I don't agree, neversaydie. The signs warning of elderly people crossing the road is fine: it's about old people who are slower than most younger people by reason of their age. Lots of old people move more slowly than your average person crossing the street. So what? This is what: watch out for them, the signs say, because they won't be able to get out of the way quickly.

Nothing whatsoever negative about that, just simple facts and reality. It doesn't refer to all old/older people, just some of the ones who are likely to be crossing the road near those signs.

And usually, if they have slowed down due to age/arthritis, etc. they will have a walking stick.

My mum was silly about carrying a white stick when she was registered blind, until I pointed out that it was as much for other people's benefit as for her. Without it they would assume she had reasonably good sight and act accordingly. A white stick saves a lot of explaining.

Spangles I was at a residential karate course and a girl tried to tell me who she'd been partnered with for some sparring. She said, 'Erm....you know...(snapping fingers)....that old woman!" I knew exactly who she meant. It was my fellow club member who has white hair but is way younger than me. She could use this description to me without embarrassment because I'm not grey. There was no reference to athletic ability, yet my friend will have easily held her own against the younger girl. The perception was: white/grey hair = old = 'nuff said!

Hello Sweek.

Yes, Vintage. I'll settle for that.

But what's wrong with old? I think the constant 'battle' that so many of us engage in to hide oldness (see that thread about wrinkle-disguising stuff) is what's ageist. Getting offended because someone thinks we're old is what's ageist.

izypop, I think the fact that your karate person referred to the old woman as her sparring partner says quite enough about the older woman's athleticism; of course she was good at karate; she wouldn't have been matched against someone who was going to make mincemeat out of her.

If we stopped being outraged about being called old, it wouldn't be a thing.

thatbags I truly believe that many people slow down because they tell themselves they should. People of my age can't, don't, shouldn't....etc. The less you do, the less you can do. Practise walking faster and you'll get faster, be stronger, live longer. My mother-in-law used to ask me regularly, "Are you still doing karate?" as if it was really time I gave in and took up knitting. I'll stop when I can't do it any more. Hopefully, that will be the day I die ?

Also, we partner with the nearest person. Could be a man or a child...

Lizzypop, try having arthritis from your late teens and saying that. Sometimes one is forced to slow down despite staying active. Everyone is different. You can't assume anything about other people and if you do you're being something that's just as bad as ageist.

In general, i reckon if a person looks old, they probably are.

The difference between me and a few others on this thread is that my reaction is "so what? There's nothing wrong with being old; nothing to hide or feel ashamed about".

izzy, I agree with you about telling oneself we should be slowing down does slow us down! I am guilty of that, treating myself like an older person. Not good! I 'll try to stop it.

Seenagers!

Like your attitude, thatbags. There's not that much can be done about it although a lot of people spend a lot of money trying to hide their age.

How about 'Snowbirds' like the senior citizens in the US who head south to Florida when the weather gets cold further north? I quite fancy being called a snowbird!

I too feel that 'elderly' means someone who is 80+. I just don't like the term 'pensioner' at all. At 64 I reached my state pension age 2 years ago but still work and haven't yet started to draw it. I suppose I feel 'middle aged' is about right although it is unlikely that I'll live to be 128!

I joke about this age thing but I am not grey (thanks to hairdresser Soph!), look younger than my age, have bags of energy (mostly) and do loads of things (not karate) that make me feel good and are helpful to other people (I hope) so what the heck has the fact that I am 67 got to do with it.

I think I would be forced to give a very withering look to anyone who called me a snowbird!

I too like "vintage persons"

When I was still at school my best friend always referred to her parents as the Aged Ps. I guess they would have been in their forties. Now they are the Even More Aged Ps (emaps).

Minibags has always thought of me as an Aged P because I was older than most of the grandmothers of her peers.

I love 'aged p' but only because it reminds me of Dickens - though I'm b******d if I can remember which one!

I'm 66 and still work full-time and yes, also collect my pension (might as well, if I popped my clogs the Government sure as anything wouldn't give the 'saved' amount to my husband!)

I HATE to see papers describing people in their 60s as elderly. Newspaper journos responsible for the trash written in the papers are probably 20-30 somethings so 60s to them is probably elderly!

Wish I didn't care - but I do! Probably because I am still working and love my job and never, ever refer to myself as 'old' as I don't want anybody taking a second look at me if I can't immediately recall something and have them wondering if I'm getting past it!

thatbags of course the things I say can't be applied to everyone. Some people are very unlucky as far as their health goes and I would never want to offend but, as a general rule we should do more not less if we want to stay active.

Anyone remember a few weeks ago it was fashion week and the London week opened with a whole 30 mins of fashion for over 50s. The design brief for this was given as a challenge to fashion students (probably aged 18 - 21) and the outfits showcased were absolutely horrible (IMHO of course)! The models mostly had long, grey curtain hair and the clothes were grey too, with the current, unflattering quilting your grandad might wear and sleeves down to the fingertips! The shoes were horrible, manly brogues at the end of skinny, black tights clad legs! This was the best the students could do for a hitherto invisible generation. The nicest outfit was a long dress in a vibrant print with a waist length leather jacket but was hardly innovative. It was the only thing I'd be seen in, dead or alive!

We're supposed to stay at home, wear pleated skirts and a blue anorak if we do emerge and have our hair neatly permed. Huh!

Dislike the doddery image 'elderly' conjures up. Mature is better but don't really see why an adjective is necessary, just say how old, if appropriate.

My Grandad, many years ago, refused to go to the local Darby and Joan Club(!) with all 'those old fogies'. He was 80ish at the time.

The Aged P is in great expectations.