Gransnet forums

Chat

Unexpected visitors

(111 Posts)
rosesarered Sun 15-Nov-15 16:14:01

Was just in the middle of preparing a chicken casserole, chopping herbs and bopping around to radio 2 in the kitchen, when the doorbell rang.DH was reading, so got up to see who it was, friends who we haven't seen for a while, who just happened to be passing.How nice! Rushed the casserole into the oven and we had a cup of tea together and a chat.They didn't stay long as they were going to see grandchildren, but I do like unexpected visitors.
I have a good friend who hates it though, she likes it all well planned.What do others think?

Albangirl14 Tue 17-Nov-15 15:48:11

At the moment there is a lot in the press about old people who are lonely. I am always welcoming to unexpected visitors. One of the reasons I do this is I think if ever I was left on my own I would need a group of friends around me who would support me and visit. However if that time came it would be otherwise too late to say I wish I had more friends outside the family so I nuture friendships now and keep in regular contact with friends who are on their own. So I say don't complain about peolple who call in there may come a day when you would be very pleased to see that friendly face.

Mumsyface Tue 17-Nov-15 12:47:12

I used to be one of those nuisance dropper inners (having come from an area and social group where it was normal and moved to an area and started to meet people who didn't do it) - then one day someone explained to me that she didn't really know what I wanted when I showed up unexpectedly and sat on her sofa blush. A few years later we started to get mobile phones so now it's easy to call ahead, problem solved. smile

bobbydog24 Tue 17-Nov-15 12:36:51

I don't mind unexpected visitors but we too are off beaten track so doesn't happem very often. We recently had old friend who'd had a row with his wife and wanted some one to talk to. We were all ready with daughter and her family to go out for Sunday lunch. They went we stayed. What are friends for eh??

Spindrift Tue 17-Nov-15 11:24:02

I would just love to have visitors full stop, I have a friend that comes here every Sunday for a coffee, & she has been wonderful since my hubby died 20th December 2011, but she is the only one, many others said we will come & see you, but not one of them has, my house is clean but never tidy lol if they are friends they don't mind, many have said it's a home not a show house & said they feel comfortable here. At one time I used to keep some scone mix I had put together (without the liquid) in the freezer, but have thrown so much out I don't now, the idea being if unexpected visitors came I could whip some up in no time. I am off the beaten track as well, a long drive from the Lane that only goes up to some farms, no-one passes, moan over lol smile

Nuttynanna Tue 17-Nov-15 10:43:00

Unlike others I absolutely hate the thought of unexpected visitors but have loved it when it (rarely) happens. I'm even a bag of nerves when guests are expected and so it probably is best for everyone for them to just turn up and make me deal with it.

Bellanonna Tue 17-Nov-15 09:38:11

Or mice, or worse... Ugh

Nelliemoser Tue 17-Nov-15 09:25:26

Every time I read this thread title Unexpected Visitors I right away think the thread is about "visitors" such as Head lice or bed bugs etc.

Just an observation. wink

As you were! grin

petra Tue 17-Nov-15 09:06:40

No problem at all. But many years ago we did have one. We hosted foreign students. One Spanish girl turned up with her Mother!! Thank goodness her room was a double.

Misha14 Tue 17-Nov-15 08:59:08

I love people turning up. OK I might not look my best and the carpets might need hovering, but it's being with friends and family that really matters.

Grandma2213 Tue 17-Nov-15 02:24:21

Have only had unexpected visitors once ie my sister, partner and two children on the way back from partner's family. Great as they stopped for an impromptu meal and lots of gossip.

The only other time it came close was when a friend from my 20s phoned as he was passing on the motorway. The call went to answer phone and I panicked and did not answer till he was clearly well past my house. We kept in touch by email and the next time he passed I knew in advance. Sad really as we connected immediately as if we had not been apart for 30+ years! I felt a bit sorry for his wife as we didn't stop talking for the 3 hours they were here even though I did try to include her. Maybe the moral is 'True friends stay that way regardless of years past or messy house!'

Deedaa Mon 16-Nov-15 22:09:24

I like to have some warning that people are coming but, on the odd occasions when an old friend has turned up unexpectedly, i've still been thrilled to see them.

Penstemmon Mon 16-Nov-15 21:43:11

If they are good enough friends to just pop by then it doesn't matter what state you or the home is in. If they are just acquaintances, killing time before they do something more interesting,then it doesn't matter what state you or the home is in.

rosesarered Mon 16-Nov-15 21:19:30

That vase of flowers means a girl nearby Grannyactivist wink

grannyactivist Mon 16-Nov-15 20:56:16

The only people I would usually drop in on occasionally are my parents in law - and I know I would always be welcome, but if they were busy they would say so. I did once call in unannounced on my son (he has a flat near his Uni) and was pleased, but not surprised, to find the place pristine - he even had a vase of flowers on the hearth.
I never mind people dropping in on me, but prefer to make arrangements to call in on others.

rosesarered Mon 16-Nov-15 20:33:06

Perhaps your visit saved their marriage busylizzy

WilmaKnickersfit Mon 16-Nov-15 20:33:06

gj what a lovely surprise - and she rang first! grin

busylizzy what a great memory! smile

busylizzy Mon 16-Nov-15 20:29:52

I don't tend to drop in on others without warning, but love it when others drop in on me! When we were young we arrived at a friends house - we had been invited a couple of weeks before. They had totally forgotten. Suitcase was in the hall, he was going back to Mum, but tried to say they were just having a clear out. They kept up the pretence of all being well, and having beans on toast for tea was just the thing. After a couple of drinks the truth came out, they ended up laughing about it, and 40 years later they are still together!

granjura Mon 16-Nov-15 17:33:36

Exactly, even if it is sod's law- when our house is all fresh and clean andtidy, with flowers everywhere looking and smelling sweet- nobody comes. But hey ho- I'd much much rather friends know that they are welcome anytime.

rosesarered Mon 16-Nov-15 16:58:31

Yes, you wouldn't want to turn someone away because the house was untidygrin.

granjura Mon 16-Nov-15 16:45:52

11.55 today, phone rings. Hello it's Josita, I am down the road- can I come and see you?

Josita was our Au Pair in Leicestershire in 1980- when I went back to full time study at Uni when our youngest was 5. She came to stay with us again with her BF around 1985- and never seen her since. She is a Professor in cognitive linguistics at a University in Michigan. Wow- so she came, the fridge was empty so we went out for lunch and she came back for a really good natter. Wonderful.

rosesarered Mon 16-Nov-15 15:25:06

I love Marmite too!

rosesarered Mon 16-Nov-15 15:24:23

Exactly my thoughts Bijou but obviously if it makes others uncomfortable
Then they need a phone call first.

Bijou Mon 16-Nov-15 15:21:18

Living alone and being practically housebound, I'd love to have someone call in unexpectedly. In the past before the days of mobile phones I enjoyed having people call in and take pot luck. A house should be a home to be lived in not a show house.
I love Marmite.

fjw2009 Mon 16-Nov-15 14:07:35

Totally agree with Bellanonna, Ana,Charleygirl and Mumagain.........can't bear to be called on unexpectedly. So much so that this is the first time I've actually posted on here to support those who are like-minded!
I don't think I'm a 'saddo' - seem to have plenty of things to do and loads of friends. Did wonder if it was something to do with DH and I both being project managers before we retired( so we like to get the maximum out of each day and are list makers par excellence!) or maybe because we are both only children of only children so accustomed to smaller numbers of people around generally . We have 2 adult married children and 2 adorable GDs -they are the total exception to the rule obviously!!

P.S. LOVE marmite!

rosesarered Mon 16-Nov-15 13:48:25

We're all different, that's for sure!smile