He's gone and i'm lost

Sheridan, whatever you do is NORMAL, please remember that, Im sure it will get a bit easier every week, instead of dreading Saturdays, why dont you pour yourself a cuppa and sit down at "the time" and say hello our remember a moment of your life together, enjoy your tea and tell your DH "same time next week darling" and make it your moment.Will be thinking about you tomorrow and i will raise a cup of tea to you both.

sheridan and pam so very sorry for you both and all who are grieving ((huggs))

Sheridan and Ana, I am so sorry for your loss, I can't give any advice as I don't know how I would cope if it was me.

Sheridan please accept my condolences. You are quite understandably in the midst of huge grief. I hope that you find some support , maybe through CRUSE or other counselling, to help you manage you loss. it is dreadful to watch a deterioration of a loved one and OK to be sad and angry about what has happened. You will never 'get over' your loss and I think it is OK to say that to family. You will always miss him dreadfully but you know eventually the loss won't be as raw as it is now. Take care

I am in tears sitting here and reading what some of you have gone through and how incredibly brave you are. I always pray that when the time comes DH goes before me because I couldn't bear to think of him being on his own, I know the children would look after him but it's just not the same. We will have been married for 52 years next month. I'm now going to give him a cuddle and tell him how incredibly lucky I am to have him. I send love to you all.

So sorry for you and everyone who has lost their sole mates. I lost my husband 22 months ago today. I don't think I'll ever get over it, but you do learn to live your life and adjust. There's no time limit on grief. It must have been so difficult for you watching him when he was ill, but it is early days yet and eventually your thoughts will turn to the life you spent and all the happy years. Much love

to all who are grieving. (((hugs)))

Sheridan and Pam and everyone else who is grieving, feel for you all.

I mean

Just read this Pam . So sorry for you as I have a friend who lost her DH at the beginning of the month.[Flowers] are not enough.

Oh Pam what a shocking and sad time for you and your family. It'll be such a busy few weeks for you (judging by my own experiences) but please keep posting as time goes on and it all sinks in.

So sorry, PamSJ1.

Glad to hear you have a good support network nearby

DH was in poor health but appeared stable on his meds. We are so grateful that we had a family break with our granddaughter a couple of weeks ago. He also managed to get to our Granddaughter's christening the day before we went away, only being released from hospital less than an hour before.

Fortunately my daughter and her partner live with us and my son lives with his partner and our granddaughter on the same Avenue. We have a wonderful extended family. My MIL and his 3 brothers were with us as soon as they were told. My son's partner has 3 older children (17 year old twins and a 15 year old). The 17 year old girl is particularly distraught as she says my DH was like a grandad to her. I just wish I could do it say more to our son and daughter. We used to joke that DH was the most incredible Dad but a lousy husband. That's not true but it has been heartbreaking to see their reactions today. I don't know how my MIL can cope. She lost her eldest son to cancer at 51 a few years ago.

PamSJ1 I am so sorry to hear of the unexpected death of your dear husband x

I am very sorry PamSJ1. Do keep posting if it helps.x

PamSJ1 I am so sorry, you must be in total shock. Is there anyone with you?

Browsing myself as can't sleep. Totally heartbroken as my beloved husband passed away suddenly this morning at 51. Everything feels so unreal.

I've just seen this thread and must say sorry for your loss. It is still early, even now nearly one year after your original post. I'm a widow as well so do understand.

I haven't read all the wonderful replies you have received,
but can be like the rest and understand how you must feel, as I have been a widow for two and half years now.
If I am correct, it seems he knew he was dying so you were able to have time to say goodbye, while this was not the case with myself, which I do miss so much. We were also living in a rented property while searching for our own property, which made matters very difficult as, along with the bereavement I had to find a property.
If you feel lonely, have you ever thought of this website:
communitynetworkprojects.org/

I too hope that you are coping Sheridan - I am sure that it is still painful, but hopefully there is some light in your life.

Nice proverb ladybird9. I hope that the OP and you yourself are feeling even a little brighter.

good morning Sheridan, I was just browsing messages etc.,
I thought that I would attempt to contact you as to how you have been coping with your loss. I too am a widow of 10 years and sorry to say but, cannot "move on" without him, although we have to ask ourselves, what is the alternative, so there are a lot of sad days and hopefully the happier days will improve, some of us cope better than others, however keep in touch with gransnet or whoever, helps you, keep occupied, maybe become a volunteer, it all helps at the end of the day.
I wish you a good day today and leave you with an old Arab Proverb " IF YOU HAVE HEALTH... YOU HAVE HOPE AND IF YOU HAVE HOPE YOU HAVE EVERYTHING" Hopefully Sheridan you have health. Best wishes xxx

Hello Sheridan Just browsing Gransnet and came across your message back in November,, silly, silly question but, how are you now, no doubt still suffering the hurt, I realise myself the hurt doesn't stop so I absolutely can empathise with you. Gransnet is a great way to off load your hurt, I feel it's almost similar to talking out your fears and feelings to a understanding friend ,I sincerely wish that one day you will come to terms with the loss, although here I am almost 9-years widowed and my hurt is still so raw. Please continue to log in, even just to off load. The spring is almost upon us, I love noticing the newness and 'come alive' of mother nature, wonderful time, just try to observe all that will happen in the springtime to our wonderful countryside, maybe walk with groups or if you have a dog, that too is a wonderful way to, just for a while, go out, feel good that you can see the trees, hear the birds and inhale the air, it does help, I promise even for a moment, it's a break from the sadness....... Please try it x