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would you move your parent in

(56 Posts)
Grannyknot Tue 06-Oct-15 15:57:45

How about the many countries all over the world, where people do not have necessarily have a lot of money, and work, but where looking after elderly relatives is part of the culture and social fabric of their society.

Anyone who has any interest in this, should read Atul Gawande's book "Being Mortal - Medicine and What Matters in the End". It is available as a free download if you search for it on Google.

This is what he said in an interview about his grandfather:

My grandfather had an amazing life. He worked the farm right up to the end of his days, helped by his children and grandchildren. He was still the head of the dinner table, revered, people came to him for advice. He had some problems with his memory and his mobility of course, but no one ever thought that the answer might come from a nursing home. In [the west] we tend to never ask people: “What is a good day for you?” Instead we say: “This is what the doctor says you have to do to stay healthy.

loopylou Tue 06-Oct-15 15:53:17

I've just read this too.
It wouldn't work for my DPs - one's blind, the other is barely mobile and can't do stairs and whilst we have a three bedroom house, one room's tiddly.

I certainly wouldn't and couldn't move in with my DCs, no room whatsoever!

rosequartz Tue 06-Oct-15 15:51:58

Well, I managed it somehow.
With three children as well as a job and a DH who worked away.

I must be a saint.

lalala Tue 06-Oct-15 15:50:48

It's just not practical. My DD and her husband work all hours to be able to afford the mortgage on their 3 bedroom home - which is full of them and 3 children. So where are they supposed to put me????

Granin Tue 06-Oct-15 15:45:30

sorry here's the link: www.telegraph.co.uk/news/politics/conservative/11913372/Make-space-for-your-grandparents-at-home-Cabinet-ministers-tell-families.html

Granin Tue 06-Oct-15 15:44:59

I can't decide whether I'm annoyed by this article or agree with it... on the one hand I agree that elderly relatives might be more comfortable and even better cared for by their children, in their children's houses. But with pension ages going up, we'll be working longer, we're not made of money - how are we supposed to also care for our parents at the same time as going out to work? i certainly won't be retiring any time soon. luckily my mother is still perfectly capable of living comfortably by herself, but if she wasn't i'm not sure what i'd do

[http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/politics/conservative/11913372/Make-space-for-your-grandparents-at-home-Cabinet-ministers-tell-families.html[