Sales call - cheek!

I haven't had those emails, phone calls etc, so I may be immortal - no matter that at the moment I feel b****y awful!

I haven't got one, but it shuts them up.

I just say yes.

When he said 'what are you going to do' I should have said 'I'm not going to be doing anything cos I will be dead'

.....and if asked will say I'm going to be tied to the roof and await the crows to pick over my bones.

OOOH can't wait to have one of these....will have some fun. My favourite at the moment is when they tell me I've had an accident in the last three years. I put on my best RP voice and start asking a lot of daft questions about which car, where it happened and who got hurt.

When I get a cold call I immediately say.... i'm hanging up.

With regard to funeral plans my father set up one each for himself and my mother. This was in the 1980s. He died in the 90s and my mother died 10 years later.
The plans were set up with a local undertaker and worked exceptionally well. All I paid for was insertion in local paper and family flowers.

DH and I keep saying that we should sort this for ourselves but haven't taken the step.

I will be ready for them next time with some of your suggestions!

I don't let anyone get much past Hallo with me on the phne and a lot of the time screen the calls anyway.

As to Funeral Plans MIL did want to buy one about 20 years ago which she did (Co-op where else) and she is still here as you have probably heard me say at approaching 102. I think she will certainly get her moneys worth now.

Funeral plans appear to be flavour of the month. I receive at least x2 emails a day about that subject- I have no idea what they are offering because I delete them. If it happens again just say that you have donated your body to science so it will not be your family's problem- that should shut him up.

You could have burst into an excerpt from Fame,
("I'm gonna live forever. . . . !")

There's a lot of it around KatyK

Although, actually it's not a bad idea, but if I was going down that route I would do it through the local undertakers, never in response to a cold call.

I had one of those calls and told him I'd planned to spontaneously combust in the garden to save the family any trouble....
There was a silence followed by the phone being put down.

Hopefully he won't call again.