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Mother's Day and new extended families!

(81 Posts)
Grannyknot Wed 11-Mar-15 09:24:27

It's a funny old world, just when you think you can finally relax in your groove for all time, another curve ball comes your way.

I don't give a hoot about Mother's Day - to me every day is "family day"! My son's mother-in-law has only daughters and a huge fuss is made of Mother's Day, with expensive gifts. So the pressure is building and his wife is a "first time mother" this year too, I am suddenly feeling the pressure when I see "To Daughter-in-Law on Mother's Day" cards, and both my children think they have neglected me for 30 odd years! Sometimes I think the best Mother's Day gift would be a day when I am left completely in peace! confused smile

How does Mother's Day work in your family?

Iam64 Thu 12-Mar-15 09:03:19

Middle daughter is joining me on a muddy dog walk, then driving me to a great local pub/restaurant for brunch. Youngest daughter dropped a card off yesterday, along with her puppy for me to look after as she's going away. Interesting as a mother's day gift smile

My mum died 8 years ago, her sight deteriorated over the final years of her life, to the extent that going off to M&S unless one of us was with her, became impossible. She loved a wander around her favourite shop and often chose a gift for special occasions during one of our trips. He absence always hits me again when Mothers Day gifts appear at M&S. I understand why people become irritated by the over commercialisation of any special occasion but we live in 2015, it's part of the way things are and we don't have to let it bother us so much smile

Lona Thu 12-Mar-15 08:17:00

Leticia that sounds like a good Mother's day to me [ flowers]

Leticia Thu 12-Mar-15 07:32:37

I am all excited this year as all my sons are coming home and we are going out to lunch!

Grannyknot Thu 12-Mar-15 07:32:14

lona sorry to read you have that situation in your son's life flowers.

absent I can't for the life of me work out why I should feel insulted at my light-hearted comment about wanting to be left in peace for a day. If we were in the same room, and your words had been spoken, they'd have gone right over my head. Whoosh.

TwiceAsNice Thu 12-Mar-15 07:16:44

Brought to me not fought to me, why don't I proof read!

TwiceAsNice Thu 12-Mar-15 07:15:56

I am driving down to DD1 and DD2 and my grandchildren ( and SIL) will be there also. I always get a small gift and card off both of them and a home made card from grandchildren which is lovely. DD2 has booked a meal at the local Italian restaurant for Sunday lunch. I won't be drinking as I'll have to drive home (2.5hours unfortunately) DD1 MIL will also be included . I'll also have a cup of tea. Fought to me in bed in the morning, they have always done that from when they were still teenagers living at home. I don't mind what happens as long as I can see them, as they don't live locally I don't get to see them every week.

Anya Thu 12-Mar-15 07:08:40

Thinking on, who brings the cup of tea in bed?

And I find it worrying that you think Mothering Sunday, in your experience, is in any way 'hysterical hype' and cards chosen with love are 'tacky'.

Anya Thu 12-Mar-15 07:00:38

Absent when my children said that to me I was not insulted, nor was it intended to be an insult by them. They were gently poking fun at my attitude and I took it as such.

I remember Bags once saying that some people are easily insulted.

absent Thu 12-Mar-15 02:01:37

I am not sure whether the grannies who like a a cup of tea in bed and a bit of peace and quiet on Mothering Sunday rather than hysterical hype and tacky greetings cards or the early Christian martyrs should feel most insulted.

Juliette Wed 11-Mar-15 18:58:38

One year DD did the ironing. Just once 1986 I think. Probably my best Mothers Day present ever. smile

ffinnochio Wed 11-Mar-15 18:50:40

Whenever my sons or I gvid. is a grand day, and as baubles said, "that'll do me". We all live in different countries and M's D. is different in each. I don't sweat it.

KatyK Wed 11-Mar-15 18:20:21

My DD has not spent Mothers Day with me since she left home. Now she has her own DD and also a MIL to visit, they usually pop in here for an hour on the day. This year however my DGD is taking part in a dance competition thingy on Sunday so they will all be going to that. (We are not invited sad ), so I'm not sure if we will see them at all. However, it is my DH's birthday on Monday so we our going for a meal on Saturday night with DD, SIL and DGD so that will be nice and it will give them the opportunity to bring his birthday present and my Mother's Day present to that if they don't have time to come on Sunday. They always get me something lovely smile although I am totally in agreement with those who say it should just be a bunch of daffs and a card or something. Like everything else, it's got a bit out of hand.

JessM Wed 11-Mar-15 17:25:52

felice that is pretty draconian!
I don't like the hype - e.g. interflora emails and junk mail. My DH lost his mother recently and I know it must be a difficult time for him and his sisters with the tidal wave of adverts and marketing everywhere you go at the moment.

Lona Wed 11-Mar-15 17:06:18

I like a card or something thoughtful, but this year I'm not expecting anything. Usually my ds cooks and invites me, but his marriage is a war zone at the moment so that won't be happening!
Dd is working. Last year her marriage was crumbling and she had no money, but she made me a patchwork cushion which had "Mum" on one side and "Nana" on the other. It didn't cost her a penny and I love it! (It's almost fallen to bits now)

grannyactivist Wed 11-Mar-15 14:10:28

My daughter has a birthday a couple of days later and as her husband is still away we're combining Mothering Sunday with a birthday meal for her. My husband planned it, sent out the invitations and is doing the cooking, which is good as he's invited sons plus wife & girlfriend, his parents and his brother and wife; not forgetting daughter and grandchildren. The plan is to take a walk and then return home for a one pot meal and cake.
I usually receive flowers from daughter, plus card. Cards from grandchildren, possibly with a little gift. A beautiful card, handmade by my older son's wife (she's a clever artist) and a very carefully chosen card from my youngest son who always picks the card for the words. As the latter has a girlfriend this year I may get a bunch of flowers, we'll see. I just love to see them all.

felice Wed 11-Mar-15 13:20:36

It is on a different Sunday here and not so much hype. We do not bother with it the card manufacturers who invented it make enough money.
I was cut out of my Mothers will when she did not recieve a card from me years ago, I explained the date difference but do not think i have ever been re-instated, don't really care.
She gets a card in French one year and Dutch the next, anyway it gives her a few weeks extra to complain about me, and she wonders why i do not live close.

baubles Wed 11-Mar-15 13:05:21

It's a non event here. When my children were small they made little cards and bought a bunch of daffs with the help of their dad. My DGDs now do the same.

I don't feel the need for any cards or flowers now that the children are adults. DD told me a few weeks ago that she really appreciated all that I do for her and the children, that'll do me.

merlotgran Wed 11-Mar-15 12:43:21

Same as jingl. They will all come here and I'll do Sunday Lunch. angry

Every year I say I'm NOT going to do it but going out to eat is a rip off and that's if you can get in anywhere.

DH will do all the veg prep and I'll buy a frozen Aldi pud and looking on the bright side, I won't have to drive so can enjoy a few Mother's Day wine grin

Anya Wed 11-Mar-15 12:33:05

My kids used to accuse me of suffering from it when I said things like 'I don't want anything for my birthday, just a card will do!'

jinglbellsfrocks Wed 11-Mar-15 12:32:07

I googled it. Extra cellular Matrix.

Anya Wed 11-Mar-15 12:31:03

Not exactly 'googable' Ana - known in our household as Early Christian Martyr Syndrome!

Ana Wed 11-Mar-15 12:29:29

I had to google that, Anya! confused

jinglbellsfrocks Wed 11-Mar-15 12:29:21

wink

jinglbellsfrocks Wed 11-Mar-15 12:29:03

Oh! FFS! Tell me what the flippin, ECM syndrome is!

jinglbellsfrocks Wed 11-Mar-15 12:28:01

I always think I should buy something nice for DD. She's a much better mum than I was. I think I will get her a nice ready planted garden container.