A four line poem

Can't think what I said
Mrs. P has cut me dead
Said she was off to sort her draws
only replied, you've a big job ahead

My brains getting addled with all this rhyme
I am thinking in couplets all of the time.
I don't know now just how I can stop.
So I'm Doomed to keep rhyming until I drop!

All this talk of bodily functions
Ointments, creams and various unctions
Not to mention tablets and pills
Between us we cover the whole world's ills!

I'm also addicted
Now I've found this thread,
For writing of rhymes
Goes on in my head!

Oh dear I'm addicted
I couldn't stay away
Well life would be boring
If it was all work and no play.

It's dull and damp in lovely Brum
But I really should get off my bum
And take a walk down to the shop
Just this last line then off I pop!

That's not true btw!

Lucky young lass is our *Littleflo,
She has managed to go go go.
She won't need no fybogel today,
I will swig three sachets and pray pray pray.

Time to get myself in gear
I've lots of things to do
I could sit here and laugh all day
I'm sure you all do too.

But life's to short
To only work
So today I'm going to
Learn to twerk

Tell a joke
Tell a riddle
But don't laugh too much
Or you'll need to piddle

I ain't going anywhere fast
I'm loving my life, long may it last
Kicking my heels, dancing a jig
Definitely no time for being a prig

I’ll leave this world as I came in, on my own.
Where I’ve come from and go to, is unbeknown.
I'll have to die to find out what’s lying in store.
What’s on the other side of death’s dark door.

Dear oh dear, how bleak and sad!
Old age isn't all that bad.
Have a laugh, join in the fun
And "read" the smiles of everyone.

AND (for jingl)

The rain has gone and blue is the sky,
The sun might even shine!
Dammit, my conscience is saying that I
Should get the washing on the line.

It's time I got up off my arse,
And did some useful work at last.
So 'bye for now my lyrical friends,
I will look in later to see how this ends.

Old age wears you down and bends your back.
What was once taut, now becomes slack.
You find life’s rewards no longer enthral,
And your normal pace is down to a crawl.

But Ariadne you live in Devon
Your rain is probably pretty as heaven.
You should try a bit of ours
Nothing worse than berkshire showers.

I'm off just now to do my bit
To try and get myself quite fit
First fitness class of the year-
This doesn't augur well I fear

Good morning, good morning to you all,
The fat, the skinny, the short, the tall.
I'm drinking my coffee and watching the rain
Wanting to go back to my bed again.

I woke up early Feeling sad
With a really aching belly
Now I don't feel quite so bad
Thanks for the laugh, lovely Nellie

Today I will be very good,
I'll iron the clothes and fetch the wood.
I'll wash the dishes and sweep the floor,
And eat the rest of DH's chocolate and hope he doesn't notice.

Oh darn! It nearly worked.

I do so love this silly thread
It's why I venture from my bed,
It makes me happy, makes me giggle,
And another chance to mention "PIDDLE.".

Sorry, if I have caused offence
I really didn't mean it

My mum would fill my mouth with soap
That would really clean it.

Apologies.

I have to say at break of day
That I think our Soutra's right
Maybe we should save our smut
For writing late at night!