Cat calls

I was around 14/15 and living in a Suffolk village. At that time there was no by-pass and lorries used to trundle through the narrow village street. I was walking to the shop one day when around twelve jeeps packed with soldiers went by. They all started yelling and whistling at me. I'll never forget how embarrassed and humiliated I felt.

I don't think wolf whistling and shouting is meant to be complimentary. I see it as a sort of "pack behaviour". Men don't generally whistle and shout comments when they're on their own and I think they do so when they're with other men so as to look like "one of the lads".

As to nightowl's experience with her young daughter, I find it sickening too.

shysal I don't know if you were being sarcastic saying you were highly amused, but, personally, I wouldn't like being spoken about in such a way and referred to as "that".

To Holly, by the by.

So very true!

I was around 14/15 and living in a Suffolk village. At that time there was no by-pass and lorries used to trundle through the narrow village street. I was walking to the shop one day when around twelve jeeps packed with soldiers went by. They all started yelling and whistling at me. I'll never forget how embarrassed and humiliated I felt.

I don't think wolf whistling and shouting is meant to be complimentary. I see it as a sort of "pack behaviour". Men don't generally whistle and shout comments when they're on their own and I think they do so when they're with other men so as to look like "one of the lads".

As to nightowl's experience with her young daughter, I find it sickening too.

shysal I don't know if you were being sarcastic saying you were highly amused, but, personally, I wouldn't like being spoken about in such a way and referred to as "that".

Thank you Nonu - it isn't difficult to see which acts have a threatening behaviour (implied or actual) and those that form a part of flirting - which we've all done, even if it's only the batting of eyelashes and a coquettish smile

Good post HOLLY

Just about sums it up .

Respect

What is it about the reality of abusive behaviour that you find so difficult to even acknowledge

Doesn't it depend on the individual whether it is abusive behaviour or not?

Two examples that happened to me:

1) When I was about 25, I was walking in a local shopping area near a roundabout. A van drove past with two young men in it and one leaned out of the window and wolf-whistled (I looked at them and shoved my nose in the air at them), they drove round the roundabout again but this time, the one young man shouted 'I love you', around the rounabout they went again and when they next passed, he shouted 'marry me'. I found that funny (not laugh out loud funny but amusing).

2) Walking down the road (I was about the same age), a man, driving a delivery wagon, slowed the wagon down, leaned out of the window and shouted 'I could show you a thing or two' to which I replied, equally as loud, 'there is nothing you could show me that I haven't seen before except you are no doubt in a worse condition'. He drove on. That one I found offensive.

As with all else, it is about implied intent - those examples show that one was nothing more than a bit of fun and the other introduced an element of sex into it.

<Le Shrug>

That is my viewpoint, which I do believe I am allowed to express, just does not coincide with some others .!!

Nonu - this subject is clearly one you find very amusing. What is it about the reality of abusive behaviour that you find so difficult to even acknowledge

30/8---- 10.25.

..................

Laugh !

All equally offensive I think absent. I think when I was young we were encouraged to believe that a wolf whistle was a compliment and I for one was always confused about why I found them so uncomfortable. I think Iam hit the nail on the head - they were never signs of approval but just another way for men to objectify and intimidate women.

I was once walking through Hyde Park with my daughter aged about 13 (not very physically mature) when we passed two men in their 20s. As we passed one said to the other 'I'll take the mother you can take the daughter' I still feel sick at the thought of it and wanted to kill the little s**t at the time. I think if anyone wolf whistled my daughter now she would soon sort them out. Thank goodness she is under no illusions about what it means.

Are wolf whistles more or less offensive than or equally offensive as comments such as "I could do her a favour"?

I couldn't make the link work either, but hope I've got the gist from the comments above.

I never appreciated wolf whistles. Husband was horrified when it started happening to our daughters. They didn't like it, but ignored it. When I was a young secretary, one of my tasks (inevitably) was to make tea and coffee for the board room. This meant going downstairs, walking through the engineering works to kitchen. It was horrible, shouts, whistles, sexual remarks. I was 18 - I loathed it, it was meant to be demeaning, intimidating and unpleasant. It was

TBF in the dark ages, when it happened to me, I found the wolf whistles quite flattering. When I was 8 and half months preg with twins I had long hair and very little expansion behind but was HUGE in front. I received wolf whistles one day walking through university quad where I worked. You should have seen the faces of the workmen when I turned round! They were very apologetic! I found it most amusing!

I think that was the last time I received them. Lack of sleep wreaks such havoc!

I still can't see catcalls and wolf whistles being the same thing. After all, it is the female cat who calls, not the male.

Btw My Webster (US dictionary) defines catcall as a harsh or shrill call or whistle expressing derision or extreme disapproval - so pretty much the same as English English.

TRIC
same question to you M OR F ,

Nonu - are you M or F?
Can't trust anyone these days

Ooer, TRIC how exciting for you , you ^MUST tell me which one"s???

Laugh

Those days are gone now, I never used to mind it.
But I still occasionally get chatted up on forums, if they only knew!

I wasn"t really talking of the Theatre, I was talking about Blokes on Building Sites !

chuckle

Even if you are in a stinker of a theatre show and you get catcalls from a disgusted audience? If you think they are showing how sexy you are, as though they are wolf-whistling, you would be pleased. If they are really showing how dreadful you are, that is a very different thing.

Cat calls, wolf whistles- same difference !!

<Le Shrug >

It's an American show so maybe in America they're the same thing.

And me...

Yes, I thought catcalls were derogatory, and wolf whistles meant approval.