The other side of the story.....

Mishap I understand what you say about voicing your blessings.
DH and I are very lucky to have no financial worries where as my friend and her husband exist on dissability benifits. When she asks what I'm up too on a weekend I am very reluctant to tell her as I know she would not be able to afford the same. It feels like I'm rubbing her nose in it.
DH and I have two wonderful children. DD and I see each other 2-3 times a week along with our beautiful grand children. We text all the time. SIL is more than happy to maintaine my car and sort out my IT problems

Apart from mum being in a care home not expected to last long. Life is good.

Thank you, Mishap, for showing such empathy. I do not begrudge anybody else their happiness and certainly if some of our stories are upsetting it would be better for people not to read them.
I have many reasons to be happy (not sure to whom I should be grateful, as nobody has given me anything!) and I have found it possible to deal with my sorrow and I do not allow it to ruin my whole life. I, too, live in a very beautiful place, I have my family in New Zealand, my sister and several loving grandchilden still in Engand, my delightful great-grandchildren, I have good health and enough income to fulfil my passion for travel.
Many people who have been denied contact with some of their family also have other problems, perhaps of poor health, a bad relationship, or financial difficulties. Of course, it is never a help to be told that there are people worse off than you are - that just makes me unhappy on their behalf.
I have been heartened by the very many messages of goodwill, sympathy and support I have had on Gransnet, which outweigh a hundred times the odd unpleasant comment.

I always feel slightly uncomfortable about posting the blessings in my life as it feels cruel to those whose lives are so unhappy with broken families. But my situation does illustrate that there are always 2 sides to life.

The surface does not look good: a husband with Parkinsons Disease (which causes far more problems than just the tremor) and anxiety; a sick father who is causing lots of worry; a broken foot which refuses to heal after 7 months or more so I cannot walk without crutches.

But the other side is: living in a stunningly beautiful place with views to die for; living in a friendly small community with lots going on and endless support on offer; having 3 wonderful DDs whose support and love is boundless; 6 lovely grandchildren of whom we see 3 several times a week and the other 3 about 4 times a year; being able to manage financially (not rich by any means, but we can get by without worry if we are careful).

I hope very much that those on here who have family tensions and things to be sad about also have joys in their lives to compensate.

inthe fields, thank you. It's good to redress the balance. Perhaps those of us who have great relationships with our families don't feel the need to post as often as those who are in real distress and who have my sympathy. The only thing that would make my life complete would be to live closer to my family especially now that my beautiful and affectionate GD is likely to leave Manchester on graduation and head for the bright lights.

This is lovely. There is so much to celebrate and be thankful for with our families. intothefields yes, I do feel truly blessed too and grateful for my childrens' health and companionship. I love the fact my daughters can still reduce me to tears of laughter, my son too. Life IS wonderful at times - it doesn't mean we don't acknowledge there are bad times for us all but celebrating the good and giving thanks for it is vital too. Thanks into for such a feel good thread

A lovely thread. Our family life is a mixture of the good and the bad but I find it helpful to focus on the good. The best thing now is that having spread their wings ,they all live in the same area and we can reach any of them within 20 minutes. The best time is the occasional Sunday when we all sit round the table together (usually ours !!) I agree that it is only when you have experienced the bad times that you really appreciate the good so hang on in there all those for whom life is difficult at the moment.

Hi inthefields I'm happy too with my lovely husband; my two loving children who have good partners; my comfortable house; a job where I am valued. But of course it didn't just happen the road has been long, and not always a sweet ride.

There was a study a few years ago that found that happiness is 'U-shaped' (you-shaped?) meaning that most people were happiest as children and then again in later life. That about sums it up for me.

Hi Glam ....I am glad it is not just me

I actually think its only having had the lows that makes one truly appreciative of being blessed.

My life experiences read like a bad novel (no-one has that much rubbish happen!!) so to be able to say that I have found safe harbour and am truly happy, with wonderful children, is something to celebrate.

I am glad you celebrate too Surely its not just two of us?!?!

inthefields what a lovely post and your family sound so kind and thoughtful,I have to admit I am also blessed with my family though we have had some high's and low's over the years but all over now (until the next crisis) my DCs are always around to see how we are and DGCs refer to me as "the queen bee" mr.glamma always call's me princess a follow on from what my dad called me and it is appreciated.
My heart goes out to families who have separation issues but always hope that these can be resolved over a matter of time but sometimes that is not possible,just keeping the door open is the only option.