my son's wedding

Welcome wolfie - go.

Our eldest son was living in Japan when he got married and, although none of our other children could go, we are so glad that Dh and I went to the wedding and spent time seeing the country. Less that a year later we were back there when he became seriously ill.

Glad you're going wolfie, it's the right choice

High fives! wolfie You know it makes sense.

I do think DC should think carefully about where they have their weddings. Couples are waiting longer to tie the knot which makes some of their parents pensioners with reduced income as a result. It is all well and good arranging the dream wedding they want but long haul flights and heat aren't everyone's cup of tea.

I do think people should take into consideration how much it will cost people to go to a wedding so far away. Sorry to be a killjoy [nothing new there then] but I think I'd spend the money on my house. Jamaica isn't my sort of place, either I'm afraid. It's such a long way away.

I'd have to go . Mind you I would be a bit miffed. That would mean my holiday had been decided for me and maybe not somewhere I would particularly want to go. Many couples say they go abroad so that it does not cost so much but you can get married without spending a fortune here and it certainly makes it more expensive for the guests.

So for my next question your dream kitchen as just been started on there is still a lot more work to be done and all your money will go on Jamaica which means you may have to wait a year or may be two to get it Finished so could you make do in a messed up kitchen for two years? Or do you still go sunny Jamaica!!!!!!!!!!

Kitchen! Jamaica is dirty, unsafe and I don't like it!

wolfie
How about an alternative think on this. If you don't want to / can't afford to go to the wedding, then perhaps a pre-wedding or post-wedding celebration could be arranged.
What would your son think about this?
Jamaica wouldn't be my choice - but I would be unhappy to miss out on the celebrations - so doing a less expensive small something without the long haul involvement might be a good balance between the kitchen/wedding conundrum?

In this age of video conferencing, I went to a 'baby shower' some months ago where the about-to-be mum's sister couldn't be present because she was travelling. So the entire proceedings was shared with the 'missing' sister via Skype. Was a bit of a pain after a while because it was "Ooh, look isn't this gorgeous" and then holding it up to Skype etc. for the sister to also see, but it kind of worked. It's certainly an option now with people scattered across the globe.

I also have a colleague who is married to a Tunisian man and they Skype his family and simply leave it on for hours as they go about their business and his family can 'visit' at any time.

Does call for decent wi-fi though.

Wolfie56 welcome.

I don't think I'd spend the money going to Jamaica just to see my son get married. He could do that perfectly well without me there.

Get on and get your house sorted. It will give you much more lasting pleasure and comfort in the long run.

wolfie my brother in law honeymooned in Jamaica and loved it, it's been their dream to return one day.
As for the kitchen; many of us have lived with either no kitchen, or with major works in progress so yes, been there, done that and didn't like it much. In our case we took out the very old kitchen, stored the cupboards etc. while walls were plastered, a new floor and ceiling were put in and then the old fitted kitchen was put back but with the addition of a new sink and drainer. So my kitchen is now about forty years old and I'm not going to put money on getting a new one any time soon! (Although it did get the smallest of passing mentions recently which upped my heartbeat with wild hope.)

Wolfie welcome, I am with the majority I would go to Jamaica because I would not like to miss the wedding.
However, really only you can make the decision that is right for you.
Good luck and whatever you decide I hope you feel happy with it.

wolfie...I'm sorry, but I've had a change of heart!
I looked at it from what I thought was 'your' point of view, but for myself, I wouldn't want to spend my kitchen money on a trip to somewhere hot (can't take the heat), and spend time with people (apart from family) that I don't know well.

So, I'd stay at home

I'm a Gemini

wolfie, I'm the same....when I thought more about your dilemma, I had to question the reasonableness of your son expecting you to spend so much money just to be at his wedding. He must know how expensive it is, and how you're fixed re the house. Second thoughts and a second opinion - I now think that if your son won't be too upset, you should stay at home!

PS I'm a Gemini too...

What a dilemma!Jamaica is full of contrasts and you can't guarantee good weather. DS1 worked and lived there for 2 years and I was relieved when he came back

I havent changed my mind, I would regret it everytime I went into the kitchen it would remind me of not bing at the wedding, it would take the shine off the kitchen. Sorry.

I'm a Libra. #priceofpotatos

Im Aquarius........... dont know what that says about me

My daughter is Aquarius.

Oh, lay off! I was just copying Ella!

hi everyone i now see some are changing there minds.what i would say is a mate of mine had a big white wedding you know the one all singing all dancing after a year they got divorced and i thought to my self at the time what a waste of money for the parents

I didn't like to mention that scenario....