Does anyone else think that there is far too much petty bickering on GN

Granny 23 I think you have put it very well indeed.

most people on here seem to be very spirited inidividuals and quite capable of working out things for themselves, and the danger comes when a "victim" enlists others to do their dirty work for them sorry to put it that way, this is what happened to me.

So far I have not seen any evidence of this on hear not that I am on here all the time!!!
it seems pretty good to me!!

Thanks mamie. I was just thinking about the "crying to teacher" phrase (or whatever it was) while I was pottering in the kitchen. Recently I did an anti-bullying activity with Cubs (it was anti-bullying week; see antibullyingalliance.org). My first question to them was "If you feel you are being bullied or one of your friends is being bullied, what should you do?" As one, they replied: "Tell someone." We then talked about who they could tell.

On gransnet the same thing applies. If you think you are being bullied, the best thing to do is to report the post(s) to HQ who will act as independent arbiters. The important additional thing to remember is that NO-ONE NEED KNOW WHO DID THE REPORTING (it need not be the person who feels bullied; really inapproriate posts will be reported by several gransnetters most probably) so there can be no childish backlash about "crying to teacher" and there need be no fear of that.

Here, here, G23.

It is so very obvious to me that posters feel ganged up on when more than one person starts questioning the posters comments. It can become relentless and the poster feels they have to defend themselves.

My advice is don't reply to posters who you feel are ganging up. Just continue on as though they are not there. It's not as if they are standing in front of you. You are not obliged to answer and it also gets you in the habit of not having to have the last word.

Bags, I don't know whether you've ever had a post reported but I have, and it was pretty obvious who'd reported it. (It was when someone followed a GN member onto this site from another site and started making trouble.)

Movedalot I was not knocking John Humphrys. I think he is great.

This slight misunderstanding just serves to show how easy it is to misinterpret another's posts. It didn't help my clarity in that post, that I was rushing to get out. Having just re read it I can see how you got that impression.

I really admire J H's approach to trying to get sensible answers from his interviewees. These are usually spokespersons, who are without a doubt well trained in techniques to avoid difficult questions. He has to be a "Rottweiler" "against" these people. To his credit he gives politicians of all parties the same treatment but he always seems to give them a very warm "thank you" at the end.

This was the point I was trying to make, but I didn't expand it fully. John H is a prime example of how it is possible to really challenge someones statements while trying to get to them justify what they are saying, but without any personal animosity at all. It isn't bullying.

I find you're comments about arbitration very negative bags and re telling someone what do you think this is all about? People are trying to tell us something and some people just don't listen. Did you talk to your cubs about what to do when they tell someone and they aren't believed?

Now where have I heard that phrase before?

I really can't be bothered to continue this discussion any more. Faye and Ana and others who have tried to make a point....in the words of the song

'They would not listen,
They're not listening still,
Perhaps they never will...

I have had a pm to say the poster found something I said to be very hurtful!
I have no idea what this post was.
But I would like to say I never have any intention to hurt any bodies feelings!

I really feel, it's about time this thread to draw to a close!

As I said before!

Peace and goodwill to all[ angels emoticon]

There you go then, jodi. I had no intention of being negative and yet you have found me so. You also seem to think that suggesting what I have found to be an effective way of dealing with what upsets me on an online forum can be defined as 'not listening'. I give up and shall take my own advice and walk away from what I interpret, possibly wrongly, as your anger.

jeni - you seem to me to be the last person to be guilty of bullying or saying anything hurtful. I imagine that the vast majority of G'netters would agree with me.

Well, I've just dipped into this thread a couple of times in a sort of wonderment and the last post has floored me. All I can say is that if someone finds anything that jeni says hurtful then they must be uber sensitive and probably shouldn't venture onto forums of this kind for their own sake. I'm dumbfounded and agree it's time this thread ended [goes away to have a cup of tea scratching head....]

Oops; now not the last post but the one before the one before that......[I think]

You're alright jens.

Jingle do you mean me? If so thanks. I think your ok as well! Happy christmas!

jeni, I think that is pretty high praise coming from JO4

I wish we had a 'tongue in cheek' emoticon which might help to avoid masses of misunderstandings. Just a thought.

We already have the 'wink' anno. I fear a 'tongue in cheek' emoticon would only give rise to more misconstructions.

crimsin it was me who PM'd jeni to tell her in private, that something she had said, had hurt me. I read jeni's post saying if she'd inadvertently hurt anyone then she was sorry.
I will take your advice now and withdraw from GN.

'course I mean you yer daffy 'erbert

Have a nice cruise btw.

Yes. PMs are supposed to be just that - private.
Nanad I'm so sorry this has happened, so soon after you'd come back, but I don't blame you.

Yes, you're right about that, Ana.

Have it out on the forum I say.

Please don't go because of something I've said nanadog; I'll go instead....it's all getting too much for me anyway. I think I'll stick to the Betfair forum where they eat people for breakfast....

Oh dear, posts all in disarray!