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Bereavement

Late husband's Birthday - what to do?

(39 Posts)
Pennylucky007 Tue 09-Jun-26 11:15:34

My husband died almost 2 years ago and I miss him every day. We were married for 33 years. His birthday is coming up and I don't know what to do with myself. How do others deal with significant dates such as this, and any ideas to keep myself busy please?

Romola Wed 10-Jun-26 17:28:18

For me, it's the anniversary of his death that's difficult. This year will be the 4th and as usual, I shall arrange a treat for me, either a concert with a friend or I shall invite half a dozen friends for dinner.

cc Wed 10-Jun-26 17:34:24

I'm lucky that my husband is still alive, but always think of my parents on their birthdays, not the days that they died. My father died well over 40 years ago and I suspect that I'm the only one who thinks of him now. My mother died 16 years ago and there is still a sinking feeling inside when I think of her, though I know that my own family think of him with love.

Snowbell Wed 10-Jun-26 17:34:34

A tough one for me as late husband's birthday was the same day as mine and also our wedding anniversary. I try to enjoy the day and I make a pilgrimage to our favourite place at the coast on the anniversary of his death, which fortunately is on a different date.

cc Wed 10-Jun-26 17:35:07

Sorry, obviously "think of her with love"... typo

grannybuy Wed 10-Jun-26 18:06:18

I always have white flowers in the house, as that’s what he liked, and DS and I toast him with a whiskey in the evening. Our two DD’s don’t live nearby, but they do the same in their homes

Kathmaggie Wed 10-Jun-26 18:18:28

My DH died 2 years ago. I bought a tree in his memory - a life for a life - in a memorial park. I visit often and ofcourse on those special occasions. His ashes are scattered under the tree. I go alone most times, and that’s ok - family and close friends come with me sometimes. It comforts me to see the young tree thriving. Sending love to all coping with bereavement

Poppyred Wed 10-Jun-26 18:51:16

I think to much emphasis is given to “dates” It’s just another day, of course you will remember your loved one as I’m sure you do everyday. I lost my husband suddenly 8 months ago, his birthday was a few months ago and Father’s Day is coming up but nothing will change… so just carry on the best you can.

SpinDriftCoastal Wed 10-Jun-26 20:01:50

Perhaps going to his favourite restaurant or eat his favourite meal or listen to some of his favourite music or perhaps go to one of his hobby events. It's about celebrating the person. Remember all the fun times and quirky things he said.

FranP Wed 10-Jun-26 22:28:04

Condolences to you ( and to all of you)

What did you do when he was still with you? Could you do this with friends a family. Did you make a special cake? Make it anyway, share it or eat it all - it's only once a year.

Try to make it a celebration rather than a sadness is all I can offer.

crazyH Thu 11-Jun-26 00:46:10

Condolences to all who have lost their loved ones. Every loss is tough, but the loss of a child must be the toughest of all. I can’t imagine that 😢

CocoPops Thu 11-Jun-26 03:27:59

My late husband died before our daughter married and unfortunately did not meet his grandchildren . It was his birthday last Saturday. I took my soon to be 17 yr. old GD shopping for clothes by way of a birthday present. We had a great time and ended the day in a restaurant where there was a jazz band playing. He would have liked that.

Macaydia Thu 11-Jun-26 06:36:38

I am heartbroken and sad every hour of the day without my husband. On his birthday should I go sadder? It will just be another day - another passing of time without my best friend by my side. Every day will be the same sad day.

Bellasnana Thu 11-Jun-26 08:20:35

Macaydia yes, that’s how I feel too but today is his birthday and my heart hurts just a bit more thinking of all the happy times we celebrated and of all he has missed these past 11 years.