widow of a suicide: advice please

A husband committing suicide is bad enough, so please don’t stop talking to her.
In your position, I would ask her to come for coffee. Her response will guide you as to future contact.
I was widowed (though not by suicide) but I would have been heartbroken if things changed with friends and acquaintances because of it.

When my brother took his own life, people crossed the if they saw us. I realise that was because they didn't know what to say but it was hurtful. I agree with putting a note through her door.

PLEASE, behave as you would if her husband had died in any other way.

Next time you see her, stop her and just say, "I was so sorry to hear of your husband's death. If I can help in any way, do please come and ask."

The very worst thing you can do is to do nothing. Most widows feel they have suddenly become completely invisible, or worse have to deal with tactless remarks, such as the one I received from a now former friend who said, believe it or not, "of course your husband did lead a hard life, smoking as much as he did"

As he did not die of lung cancer I felt she could have buttoned her lip!

I so agree with Sago. People will definitely avoid her, I think, mainly because they do not know what to say.

I think you need to do more than put a note through her door. Could you invite her out for a dog walk, even if that starts with a note through the letterbox, she will at least reply.

She would probably want to talk, she’s got a lot on her shoulders, offer her a friendly ‘so sorry to hear etc’ and see where it goes it could make a lot of difference to her state of mind poor lady
Offer her a friendly shoulder

If you know where she lives then a condolence note through the door?

Our dear friend committed suicide, his lovely widow was sick of people avoiding her, it added to her grief.

Talk to her, offer condolences and maybe suggest a dog walk together every now and then.