Yes Doodle, it really is hard. I’m mid two year anniversaries and finding the theory about how challenging this particular anniversary can be, is correct. I still wake with first thoughts about his absence. I’m blessed with family and friends so can’t say I’m lonely but I am alone. I miss the living companionship, so many shared as well as separate interests. I can’t imagine a time when I don’t miss him as I try to build a good life (when i. Truth I preferred my old one)