Was this a bit weird?

Many years ago my husband worked at a car dealership and took a customer out on a test drive. It was winter and dark.

When they got out into the countryside he pulled over so the customer could drive.
The man locked the car doors, pulled a gun out and drove off, leaving my husband stranded.

He saw a farmhouse with the lights on, walked to it and knocked on the door.
A woman answered and was happy to help my husband call the Police (pre mobile phones) and made sure he was ok. I think she made him a cup of tea.

When he eventually got home, very late and in quite a state, he told me what had happened.

I have to say I told him I didn't think I would have answered the door to him... 😕

I had only just arrived home when there was a knock on the door, a man was standing there and he immediately handed me his phone. A woman on the other end explained that he didn’t speak English, that I needed to get an ambulance to him as he was ill. I was very reluctant to call an ambulance on what I thought was a false pretence. I live on a busy main road through a village, there were several other houses he could have gone to, I am very scam aware and had heard that people watch you as you return home, knock as soon as you do in the hope that they can grab your handbag which you have probably just put down. He had arrived on a motorbike which was parked outside my next door neighbour. I called my DH who tried speaking to this man, who, it turned out did speak some English. I did call 999, the operator asked us questions to put to him (we hadn’t let him in), which he did answer, but at this point he just walked off and disappeared on his bike! We did send the doorbell video clip to the local police.

I once accompanied a friend to AnE and became aware that a young lad was having trouble getting a lift home and had run out of money using the public phone. I gave him a couple of quid and he used it to then phone his mate and order some drugs for when he got home. 🙄

It’s possible he was suffering from dementia.

When I was a child we lived in a very rural village and tramps, or gentlemen of the road as they were called, occasionally knocked and asked for hot water for a cup of tea. We happily gave them hot water and something to eat and they were always very grateful and polite. We knew our gate had some sort of mark made by them to show others we were happy to do this. I can’t really imagine this happening now!

Bazza

When I was a child we lived in a very rural village and tramps, or gentlemen of the road as they were called, occasionally knocked and asked for hot water for a cup of tea. We happily gave them hot water and something to eat and they were always very grateful and polite. We knew our gate had some sort of mark made by them to show others we were happy to do this. I can’t really imagine this happening now!

I remember also my mum giving bread and cheese, hot water and mugs of tea to random tramps who called at our farm. My dad, if around when they called would give them a job to do in return, mucking out a stable, sweeping the yard etc. They were always very happy to do these jobs in return for something to eat and drink. We got to know them over the years.

Hubby and I were in Dublin when a smartly dressed man asked us for his bus fare. He said he was going for a job interview but hadn't the money for his fare. We gave it to him. It was probably a scam but on the other hand if it was true I hope he got the job.

Not weird at all. The man is obviously a thief trying a sob-story to get into your house and nick something while you are trying to help him.

Godd thing you told him you couldn't help.

Bazza, you’ll be pleased to hear this does still happen, in fact a tramp in my (rural) area, who is permitted to sleep in the little church when he passes through sometimes, returned the compliment of hot water given occasionally by presenting me with a box of chocolates one Christmas a few years ago.

Sadly we don’t see much of him recently.

Seems odd he had a friend up the road!!!! Think you've had a very lucky escape!!!

I go out in my car without a mobile phone, as I hate them.

Moi? Anyone disturbing my peace as this twerp ? I'd call the police and see how fast he can run on a falsie.....

Sounds like the OP dodged a bullet. Has the man knocked on my door I might have offered to call his breakdown service on his behalf - but wouldn't have let him inside the house, might have tried to take his photo on my mobile too. If it were genuine he would have gone along with the suggestion surely? if not, he would have legged it.

Delila and Bazza - I think if your parents always helped you have a tendency to help too. We used to have gypsies and men of the road call at my childhood home and they would always be treated well by my parents.

It is so hard to tell what is a genuine need, isn't it? I have to confess I usually walk past the beggars outside supermarkets, though I do usually try to acknowledge their presence with a smile. If I offer them a hot drink, they usually say someone has just given them one.

But on one occasion a young lad sitting by the entrance somehow didn't look like the usual type. He called out to me for help and said his girlfriend has just kicked him out with nothing and he needed a few pounds more to make up the train fare to get back to his parents. Something just nudged me that he might actually be telling the truth, I don't know why, and with some hesitation I did give him £5. He was extraordinarily grateful, thanking me over and over again, and got up and walked off. I had to return a few minutes later, and there was no sign of him, so I really do hope he made it home!

I am always conscious of the instruction 'As you did it to one of the least of thesemy brothers, you did it to me' and feel that I fail in that regard so often!

We've a regular who knocks on a monthly basis who needs money to get to london to visit his son in hospital. He obviously forgets he's knocked at our place before.

B9exchange there is a lady who sits outside a supermarket I use occasionally. She is often there and never asks for anything though clearly that's why she's there. I always chat to her and have learned quite a bit about her and her daughter and how she worries about her daughter because of her mental health problems. She was very excited in about November as her daughter had finally started to accept help from local services and was at last being considered for sheltered accommodation.

After Christmas i saw her again and her daughter had gone missing - when she returned a week or two ago, she would no longer engage. She lost her flat and was back on the streets.

The situation is terrible and full of sadness. This woman is still a mother and totally unable to help her daughter. She sometimes saves "treats" such as a bar of chocolate in case she sees her.
We are all just so lucky on here. All of us really.

I try to have a pound or two in my pocket when I go there. Next time I think I will take gloves as she has only ones with giant holes in...

Janetashbolt are you near a station?
Might it be true?

You sound a lovely lady NotSpaghetti, it is wonderful you take an interest, and I do hope she starts talking to you again soon.

I don't know, B9 but thank you.
I do try to be kind to others if I can.

I've worked with homeless people in the past and know how easily it can happen and how hard it is for some people to get out of it. The homeless people we see on the street are just at the extreme end of things but they are all people with genuine stories.
It costs nothing to give someone a few minutes of your time and treat them as a person, not just a problem.

Here in SW London we have a serial doorstep scammer of exactly this kind of nature. Always it's a lost key or needing money to get to hospital, anything the guy can think of. He's regularly reported on our local Next Door group, doing the rounds and we all go, oh look, it's Darren Bingham again (because it always is - there are photos to show). I guess most areas have one just like him!

Two things spring to mind
1) OP was not alone in the house, her friend was there but she might have been. A chain helps you feel less vulnerable or standing half behind the door ("to keep the dog in") helps.
2) I find it hard to believe that anybody in this day and age leaves their back door unlocked. Even in the heatwave last summer we were advised to resist the temptation to leave patio doors open and to lock up even if we were in the house. Common sense to me!

My partner has, what we call his Friday night gang of homeless men. It stated some years when they asked him for money and he said, no, but I’ll buy you some food.
So they either have burgers of kebabs.

In December I had a night when I couldn't sleep ,so my bedroom light was on at 4 am I thought I heard a knocking on the door below my bedroom window. Then my H came to say he had been woken up by talking at the front of the house and looked out to see 2 people at the back of the car. He banged on the window and they disappeared . He had to get dressed to go and look if the sheds and garden were OK. Unfortunately there is a rarely used public footpath through our yard. No sign of anything since but we are having an upgrade to our alarm system.. My D told me to report it to police and I told all the neighbours, those who live within 1/2 a mile of us.

That's weird, the first thing that sprang to mind when i read your post was, if his friend lives up the road why didn't he go straight there! But then i thought hmmmm, maybe he had difficulty in walking to his friends house just up the road considering he 1 leg and using crutches..... I wouldn't have recognised that particular scenario if i didn't have mobility issues myself and am fully aware that a small, small distance is in fact a huge task to achieve, but its a case of 'who knows' in which case keep doors locked.

Its really sad that we view such situations as scams and up to no damn good BUT BUT unfortunately thats the way of the world.

Sorry you have had this prey on your mind.