Is this normal, usual, unusual, barmy or sensible??

Kateykrunch you are definitely not alone. My daughter hates work being done in the house and will escape if possible. She finds the disruption extremely stressful.

Good wishes for your recovery. Don't worry your husband appears to understand or he would ask you to stay. Go out and do something you enjoy.

House renovations and alterations are not the most important thing on your mind at the moment, I would guess, which is perfectly understandable considering what you have been through in the last few years.
There might even be a bit of subconscious resentment that houses can be fixed, whereas there is no certainty about the result when a body needs fixing.

But I think its perfectly normal to feel like that about workmen in the house. I live on my own and when I need something fixing I just feel like a spare part who can't settle to anything whilst someone else is in the house. I have to put my trust in them that they are not having a sneaky look at this or that so all my senses ( which aren't great at my age!) are on the alert and its a big relief when they go. Coincidentally I've had a man here this morning to fix my gutter, and it was a great relief when he had finished and left!
So just thank your lucky stars you have someone to delegate the responsibility to and wander off to the library to find a book, then coffee shop to enjoy it!!

All good wishes for your recovery from the cancer.

Sending best wishes to you KateyKrunch and Sweetcakes, hope treatment goes well for both of you.

I too hate having people in the house, even our lovely decorator who is no bother and just gets on with it. What I really want is for someone to anticipate exactly what I want, even if I don't know myself, and then get on with it while I am away, preferably on holiday, returning to everything done, dusted, sorted and back in place.

KatieKrunch, firstly I am sorry to hear of your diagnosis. With regard to your question I am exactly the same. I have to go out when the man comes to service the boiler! I hate having people in the house. I was the same when they came to put new windows in, its an awful feeling almost like a panic attack. I wish I was not like it. I never have friends to the house, always meet out or go to them people must think I am very strange but my best friend is fine with it.

Oh, and I’ve had two strokes while all that’s gone on…..

I’ve always had to oversee anything being done at our home.. my husband is the one to disappear! I resented it like hell….don’t know how your husband feels about it ….why not ask him! I’ve had ( over 40 years) two new kitchen …two new bathrooms…. new central heating system….new boiler ( last year) ….new carpets in every room upstairs …new wooden floorboards downstairs…. Alll new windows once plus replacements over the years! About 4 new doors( back and front and patio and garage) all overseen by me cos “ I can’t cope with it all” comes from him! With my husband it was always a case of if I’ve arranged it…ordered the workmen… and supervised….if it goes wrong it’s my fault!!! He’s a ‘buck-passer’. I hated it! Ask your hubby.

I hate having workmen in the house at the best of times and always try to go out as much as I can.
Best wishes for your recovery.

sweetcakes

kateykrunch totally understand how you feel I have breast cancer also first time but I'm going back in because they haven't got it all, the thought of having people doing thing in my home fills me with dread. I've always been able to manage trades people doing things but at the moment it's a no no.
With the pandemic as well you probably have been locked away from the world being vulnerable and all of a sudden your expected to welcome the world back in. If your husband can cope with it all then go out enjoy your day have lunch meet up with a friend.
Have a good day.

Aww Sweetcakes, sorry you are having to go through another op, wishing you all the best, happy for private message if you want a chat x

kateykrunch totally understand how you feel I have breast cancer also first time but I'm going back in because they haven't got it all, the thought of having people doing thing in my home fills me with dread. I've always been able to manage trades people doing things but at the moment it's a no no.
With the pandemic as well you probably have been locked away from the world being vulnerable and all of a sudden your expected to welcome the world back in. If your husband can cope with it all then go out enjoy your day have lunch meet up with a friend.
Have a good day.

Unless my input is going to be needed on the day, I go out.

Of course MrOops will have his list of what I want done before I leave the house, he knows better than to deviate from what has been discussed.🤗

If your husband is happy overseeing the work then I don't think there's anything for you to worry about. Get out of the house and find something to occupy your time. Not barmy, or unusual, simply sensible imo.

Best wishes for your treatment.

You are not barmy at all Kateykrunch I feel exactly the same with having workmen in the house. I even leave it to DH if they are coming to give a quotation for any work. Currently awaiting a date for some electrical work that will take half a day. Knowing this house it will probably take longer. I must plan a day out!

Wishing you well with your treatment.

do what you need to do. It sounds like you have been through enough

Thanks for your good wishes for my recovery. I am glad to read that others would do the same and escape for the day, so I am considering myself savvy and sensible, rather than barmy, thanks all.

Just stay focused on the work being carried out and enjoy the finished result. Workmen have to carry out the work involved. Offer a cuppie and feel you are doing your bit. Hopefully you will be feeling better soon and feel illness is behind you. Good luck.x

I wish you a full recovery Kateykrunch and I understand your need to get away. When workmen are in the house it feels as though you are being invaded, doesn't it? I'm sure it's completely normal.

Sorry to hear about your health problems Kateykrunch I hope you make a good recovery.
I think you are being very sensible to keep out of the way of all the disruption, I hate it too and I am relatively well. Leave your husband to deal with it and do something you enjoy, cinema, shopping, visit family etc. Good luck.

To be honest, I find that kind of upheaval stressful at the best of times, so I can understand why it's making you even more stressed right now. I agree with the others - try to stay away during at least the worst of it if you can. You need to put yourself first right now. Take care and hope all goes well.

Sorry about the bad time you’ve been having healthwise Kateykrunch, but I’m with you on the not being around whilst workmen are in. It’s irritating, and DH copes so much better anyway.
The one exception is the gas board workers fitting new equipment. One group would have left me with a hole in the wall over the weekend if I hadn’t refused to let them out till it was fixed.
Stay away if you can, then enjoy the results.

So, have you completed your treatment for the second bout of Breast Cancer? Having workmen in the house is the worst thing ever. I know, I’ve been through it, about 9 years ago. I couldn’t wait to have the house to myself. It can’t be easy, on top of what you are going through.
Why don’t you postpone all these home-improvements till your treatment is complete, and you feel much better. New carpets can wait. Get yourself fit and healthy first

I don't like people in my space either, so I quite understand. I like the design bit - choosing finishes and colours etc, but really dislike having things 'done', particularly if it takes time and people have to access all areas.

If you can get away, don't worry about it. The people in the house are probably happier without someone fussing over them anyway.

Seems sensible to me.

Too disruptive, especially when you are not well. I wouldn’t bother, personally.