Should I risk it? Age 61 divorced, to retire?

Hi Mumx5. I totally empathise with your situation. I need to work until my state pension and its tiring. I have also been a carer in the past and know how totally draining that can be.
With both areas you need to get support and the Citizens Advice are excellent. There may also be a charity that supports carers of your sons condition. Your local council can do a carers assessment and will have a supportive carers group.
From a benefits point of view if you claim Universal Credit you will have a 5 week wait for payment. If your son is receipt of PIP or certain other benefits you can officially be his carer and not be expected to look for work.
A lot depends on your sons health,if he receives disability benefits already it could be an easier process. If he has to apply for them it can be a lengthy and stressful process. Again it's important you have support to fill the forms in.
The current financial climate is tricky and so it's best to calculate how you will cope and if there are things you can economies on.
You may be able to pick up another less stressful job. You certainly sound like you need a break from everything. Maybe your GP could help. Many now have social prescribes who can refer you to wellbeing activities. Take care ?

It might be surprising how much money you save by not working. Transport used to cost me a fortune, and then there are clothes, lunches, all sorts of things that I didn't need when I retired. I was 57 when I left work. I claimed a (much reduced) occupational pension at 60, and have nearly 5 years to go before my state pension. I do have some savings as a cushion, and like many people found I didn't spend a lot during Covid, and your circumstances may be different, but it's worth looking at bank statements to see where your money goes, and whether it would be the same if you weren't working.

I agree with the others that there may be some benefits you can claim if you become a full-time carer for your youngest child, and possibly for yourself too, if your health is bad. It's definitely worth looking into that, too.

Would you consider child-minding? As a nursery assistant you will have the skills, and it would bring in some money, but clearly it would be tiring too, and you don't necessarily want to swap the security of a salary for a riskier venture. The good thing would be that you'd be at home with your youngest, though.

I think it's time for a sit down with a pen and paper to help you write down your options at this stage

Once you have written them down score them out of 10 to help you decide which you would be happier doing

You might need some financial advice too, which you can get for free from the Citizens advice bureau and with regards to benefits you might be entitled to, you can contact www.turn2us, as they will work out how much benefits you could be entitled to and make sure that you are receiving what you are entitled too

Sounds like you have a strong attitude that has brought you this far so very well done for having the strength that you have, you are an inspiration

Good luck with everything

Just another thought, if you are in the UK you can usually access private pensions from age 55. Might be worth looking into.

Some excellent ideas and advice here.

Perhaps you don't need to retire, just have a break from work for a while. If you can manage financially maybe resigning and taking a few months just to breathe will recharge your batteries and give you time to think.

It's amazing what floods into your mind and the opportunities that arise if you give yourself some space. Perhaps you'll think of an easier way of funding the next few years, maybe doing something you'll love.

Could one of your other children stay with your son so that you can have a couple of nights away? That might give you chance to clear your head and concentrate on you for a bit. A change of scene often works wonders.

Pressing on when you are tired, worn down and have many demands on your time is very hard. It sounds like you need some time to you. I hope you get it.

If you cannot manage on the reduced income then you can always go back to work, maybe something with less responsibility, a supermarket or similar.

Hi! Are you concerned about your reduced income if you give up your paid employment- before your pension is due to start paying out?
If your worries are financial it may help to work out your average spending on essentials and work out what income you and your son need to balance the books. Could you and your son be entitled to any benefits or support that may help compensate for the reduced income? I presume that you are not in the UK ( as state pension age is older than 65) . Is there a benefits or money adviser that could help you look at how to afford to retire early? Would changing to a different part time job suit you better? Would you miss the social contact of working outside your home?
I am older ( so just getting my state pension) and am also a carer to an adult son, and have recently reduced my work commitments ( officially retired but still working 1 day a week) One of my main worries is how I will cope with not getting away from my domestic and care duties - and I’ll miss feeling useful at work! As a carer working part time - work has always been a bit of an escape for me- but recently physically I have struggled at work so felt it was time to mostly retire.

Could you get another, less demanding, job? There's a lot of vacancies at the moment.

Are you getting all the benefits you are entitled to? Inc carer's allowance, Universal credit, council tax reduction .... Do your other children live close and able to help out, let you have an evening out?

Short term, could you get help if you want to continue working?

Long term, I would work on a plan for yourself and your AC that need care, as health incidents will occur