Is this breaking the rules?

Similar here in that DD lives very close and I help and see the little ones 3/4 times a week usually.But we are not visiting each other's houses at all.I have dropped off things a couple of times - but put on the doorstep and then we have chatted for a couple of minutes whilst I stood at the end of the drive.But DGC finds it more confusing to actually see me but not be able to come close.So now we facetime and I get to see them that way.It's rubbish but has to be done.DD sees first hand at work the effects if this virus and the tragedy of people dying with no family with them.It seems a long time but hopefully once lockdown ends we will all realise it was a relatively short time to keep our loved ones and ourselves safe.I feel incredibly frustrated today after hearing several instances of families who just can't or won't keep away from each other,and keep finding excuses fir popping in or meeting up.

Focus on next year BonnieB.

By then your little GS will be older and much more aware of his birthday than this one, and hopefully this sad time will be over.

Our neighbours were quite safe, our garage and theirs stand between our gardens. Also I know DD is in the vulnerable group, but as SIL is a key worker he is still going out to work and I worry about that. But we wont repeat the visit this weekend. Isn't this so hard? Wee GS will have his first birthday in a few weeks time. We were to host a big family party for him and now it will just be his mum and dad. He wont know of course but we will! I will probably spend the day weeping. After lots of tough times hes the light of my life.

Calendar girl is right. It is bending the rules and a slippery slope.
All my DDs and families live close by, but we have only seen and spoken on various media.
My heart aches to be with them but hard as it is, why should I consider myself a special case.

That’s very sad for her maddyone but at least you get her shopping for her, and no doubt talk on the phone a lot.

I think you know it’s breaking the rules. I feel terrible about my elderly mother who’s 92 years old, all alone in her sheltered apartment. I normally visit her at least 6 days out 7. We put her shopping on our click and collect and our son or daughter collects it. We then clean everything off with alcohol wipes or soapy water and then my husband delivers her shopping to her via the stairs rather than the frequently used lift. Her apartment is then the first one so no walking through loads of corridors. I’d dearly like to bring her here to stay with us, but it’s not allowed.
We also miss our children and grandchildren, we have a quick distance chat when they bring the groceries, and then we FaceTime and/or chat on the phone. It’s hard I know, but we’re all in the same boat.

Sorry, but no, you shouldn’t be doing it. Our son and family live five minutes walk away. They have a huge garden so yes, we could go and sit outside with them, at a distance, but we don’t as that would be ‘bending’ the rules and that’s the start of the slippery slope.

I don't know how wide your decking is - but did you also allow three metres from the boundary and your neighbours (to protect them too)? I don't think even three metres is safe in a breeze, though.

We all miss our families but we can manage very well without rule bending or breaking. I find it difficult at times, but I will be so proud of myself, later,
for doing my best.

Coolgran same as you, AC and DGC drop us off some things then stay on the drive well away whilst we have quick chat....nothing wrong with that.
We wave or have a quick word or two with neighbours as well, staying a safe distance.
It ‘s not about obeying set rules, it’s about being sensible.

I have a gut feeling that if you feel you need to ask, then it probably is.
Of course you would take all precautions, but you would not be acting strictly according to the government advice. It is however up to your conscience.

There will be many who think they can bend the rules this weekend, and in 2 or 3 weeks time, they and we may be paying the price.

I'd say absolutely not........households mixing at one another's homes, even if staying the recommended distance, is against the rules, I believe. I too would love to see my GC, but have had to make do with a Skype session every weekend, because I truly believe that the more we avoid any social contact, the quicker this will all be over and we can be reunited with our loved ones sooner rather than later. I feel for you, I truly do, but just not worth the risk.

Team no

Wonderful, uplifting news but a really important reason to stick firmly to the rules and make sure your daughter stays super safe.

www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.bbc.co.uk/news/amp/health-51703892

If she’s pregnant then she’s in the at risk category, isn’t she? []https://www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.bbc.co.uk/news/amp/health-51703892]] All the more reason not to do it.

Thank you folks. I appreciate you advice. I felt a bit uncomfortable about it which was why I posted. It is killing me not cuddling the baby but I haven't. It's also hard because my daughter is pregnant again and I cant give her practical support. New baby due in September so hopefully things will be better by then and something wonderful to look forward too!

Members of my family, every day put their lives on the line to care for people who thought they were safe following the rules

The rules are not a definite safety net. They are the best that can be advised whilst allowing absolutely necessary things to happen like getting food, medicine, taking enough exercise to keep you healthy. Every social contact carries a risk.

People still think it won’t happen to them.

Rules have a spirit and a letter. Look at the purpose of the rules, the purpose of the rules is to stop Covid-19 spreading by minimising contact between people.

On that basis, you would be within the letter of the law, but then you need to look at the spirit of the law, which is to minimise the opportunity of the virus spreading and while one family doing what you are thinking of doing would be unlikely to spread the virus, you need to think what effect hundreds or thousands of families doing what you are thinking of doing and it becomes a avery different matter and I think for that reason, the meeting you plan would be going completely counter to the whole meaning and spirit of the regulations.

Just imagine how you would feel if you infected THEM. How would you feel if you gave it to your GCs and one of them DIED? Just because you're older and 'vulnerable' doesn't mean they aren't vulnerable too.
Better to miss them for a month or two than to miss them for the rest of your life! So NO - stay away - that's the best way to show you love them.

The less time you spend near other people the better. Whatever the rules, just lets get through this and then life can return to normal. It is this constant attempt to bend and break rules that is going to extend our lockdown period, putting many people out of business and killing many many more people.

If anyone in the group has the virus but is currently asymptomatic then they will be spreading the virus - on things they touch, in coughs or sneezes (there’s some evidence from lab tests that this could be 6m and not 2) and so on. The guidelines about not mixing households really are there for a reason - difficult though it may be it’s only for a short period of time and it’s just not worth the risk for a couple of hours and a cup of coffee. My sister is in her forties, fit and healthy, and very, very fortunately recovering from a mild case of covid - 2 weeks on and she’s still exhausted and short of breath. She said she wouldn’t wish it on anyone. Just don’t do it, it could have a tragic outcome.

Is the disgruntled neighbour a member of the Stasi?

Today our son brought us some food and set it at the back door. He stepped back up the drive. Two dgc age 12 and 11 stood up the drive. We talked for about 10 minutes at about 10 ft apart. No drinks. No sitting down. And off they went with air kisses. Really safe.

I didn’t think we were breaking any rules but now not sure.

It is breaking the rules, you risk a disgruntled neighbour shopping you and that risks this situation going on and on. I drove past my DD house today and chose not to stop and wave at my DGS through the window as it would break my heart not to scoop him up and kiss him, I chose to stay away and if everyone could do that this sorry situation could be over sooner.

We share a communal garden with our neighbours. We sit outside and chat making sure we're at least 2m apart. I can't see how that's much different provided your family don't have to travel too far.