How do I start to make friends

How about a rambling group? Is there one near you? It's a great way to exercise, meet other people in an easy, natural way and you see some wonderful countryside. Quite a few U3as have a walking group, or there ae local groups as well as the Ramblers Association groups.

I am a member of U3A, the same as some other's on here, it is a great place to meet new people and learn about things that interest you. There are a vast amount of different courses that you can take and because they are local to you the classes are easy to get to, some are held in members houses. I am currently learning Tai Chi, I attend a course on Philosophy and learning Spanish, I also belong to a Circle Dance Group.

I moved back to the UK after several years abroad and have found making friends very difficult. My DH is not a mixer and seems to have no need of anybody else. I tried volunteering and met people to chat to when 'working' but still have not made a friend after 8 years. Easier said than done.

I'm 66 and in a new area. Apart from two neighbours there is no one else living locally to me so I am joining the WI and the Mothers Union in the nearest small town, four miles up the road. That should help me to make new friends. I know it's not something that every one would want to do, and I've never considered it before. Might that be a way for you to get to know people?

I agree U3A is wonderful - you don't have to be clever, just interested (in one or more of the many subjects your local group offers). They often have a volunteer who takes newcomers 'under their wing'. Go for it!

Do you have an interest such as patchwork or knitting? There are clubs which specialise in that sort of thing and it's always helpful to find people with a shared interest as it gives you an automatic subject to talk about if you're shy about starting a conversation.

In our area there 3 U3a groups I can catch bus to, and another 2 I can drive to. Each group has a wide variety of classes, but some interests are only catered for by one or two groups. Go to website and investigate what's available.

Trouble is when you are a bit shy or lacking in confidence (as I am) even making that first move to join anything can be really difficult. If you can overcome that first obstacle it gets easier.

Volunteering is a great idea. Around here they'd snap your hand off for your services!

On a social level, there's NWR, which I've always found to be very friendly. nwr.org.uk

You could also ask in your library if there are any book groups, if you like to read.

Good luck!

Do you like dogs? If so, taking your dog for walks can be a good way of chatting with neighbours who also are dog-owners.

I agree with BlueBelle, volunteering might be a good idea, either in a local charity shop or at some cause that interests you.

Is there a local school near? They are often very grateful for people to help with reading, basically you sit with a child who will read to you, you may need to help them with one or two words but no more than that. Try -it's always worth it!

It's Easy to tell Eileen to join a group which is of course the most obvious way to make friends but for some people walking into an established group can be really impossible to do I know I find it incredibly difficult myself
I think volunteering maybe a better way to start with anyway as it's not quite so obvious you are doing it for company and you do get a good feeling knowing you are helping

My late mother always used to quote Enid Blyton, who said if you want to have a friend you have to be a friend.

As a WI President I can certainly recommend joining a WI, there may be several in your area so have a look here - www.thewi.org.uk/

There are lots of other organisations that want volunteers and are very welcoming. I've been involved with Riding for the Disabled (RDA) for many years and most groups welcome new help with open arms! You can find your local group here - www.rda.org.uk

We have a community shop which is always happy to have new volunteers - you don't have to serve, you can help in other ways often.

good luck!

I still work full-time but as I live alone weekends and bank holidays can be lonely the thing is the longer it as gone on the more it is starting to become difficult to make the effort to change I looked at a few things online including U3A but most of the activities are during the day

Hi!
You ask how you can make friends. If you area widow, try "Jolly Dollies". They are on line. I had them pointed out to me by Cruse when my husband died.
You will see contact details for widows in your area who are looking for companions for visits to theatre, cinema etc. or just for a cuppa.

Some areas have events organised.

Thanks Coconut, I did look at some 'Meet up groups but couldn't find much. Most of it was in Norwich and I'm South on the Norfolk/Suffolk border near Diss. I shall look again.

My aunt was widowed a few years ago and most of her friends were couples. Someone suggested WI. She didn't think it'd be for her she says it's the best decision she's made! She's made lots of new friends and even been on holiday with a few!

U 3A groups can be practical interests. I do table tennis, cycling, walking and water sports with our group. We have 42 different groups so something for everyone

What is your area ?

"Over 50 Meet Up" Groups are very well spread now, search on line and see if there's one in your area. I go to shows, Jazz nights, meals out, seafront walks, cinema trips etc Others Meet Up to go dog walking, " come dine with me " groups, keep fit, yoga, choir groups, and even belly dancing .... there really is something for everyone. You will meet loads of new people in the same position as you. Also, research single travellers groups.

Granpe - no you don't have to have been to university to join U3A. It is not a university in the usual sense - it doesn't ask for, or give, qualifications. It is a way for older people to meet and learn together, and well worth joining. I hope you will join it and enjoy what it offers.

I agree that U3A is a great way to meet people, and I understand how easy it is to feel unsure of yourself, especially if you move to a new area. I hope you will understand what I want to say now - I have in my life had depression and what you say about its being hard even to go to the local shop rings bells for me. I wonder if you may be a bit depressed? So many people experience this some time in their lives but I remember feeling embarrassed about it and not wanting other people to know, so I didn't ask for someone to help. I have recovered and I now know it would have been a good thing to find someone to talk to - a trusted friend, or maybe a counsellor. This can help greatly. And if you can find a way to volunteer to help others, that too over time can hugely help your own mood. But you may also like to do something else - there is a lot of evidence that regular walking can lift depression and many people recover from it entirely with walking, and without medication. You would need to work up to walking at least 30 minutes a day, (more if possible - say 40 minutes or an hour) some of it brisk walking so you get a bit out of breath, and at least 5 days a week. At first you may be reluctant - but if you do it any way, I am betting you will find it helps a lot. Just being out of doors, in the light of the sky, is good for how we feel. Walking and talking to someone can make a huge difference to your life. I wish you well eileen66

I moved last year and have found it difficult. I'm still working so you'll have more flexibility if you're able to do things in the day. I'm finding with my age group...mid fifties...it very hard but think it will be better for you. Good advice from everyone! Any tips for me would be helpful...I work out of the area so can't make friends there.

Do you have to have been to University to join U3A ?