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widowed friend visiting

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TriciaF Tue 09-Jun-15 14:02:59

On Thursday a friend is coming for lunch who was widowed not long ago. Her husband died after a fairly long painful illness (cancer.)
We haven't seen her since he died, and we were very fond of them both.
She's coming with her brother.
Obviously we'll be asking what's new since we last saw her, but I was wondering about whether to ask about her husband, how much to mention him etc. She's a very practical person and I've been told that she's coping well, but I don't want to re-open old wounds.
Any advice?

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Granne72 Thu 11-Jun-15 17:05:45

Tricia i hope it went well today and you found the right words .
We, the bereaved can not go from a special person being a big part of our lives to not being mentioned.
The person is no longer part of our present or future but still existed in our past . I was desperate to still talk about the person i had lost.

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TriciaF Thu 11-Jun-15 17:16:18

Thanks, Granne72. I was just going to reply to say the visit went well TG. My friend mentioned her husband's name many times so I was able to feel relaxed and we enjoyed the time together very much.
Hoping to see her again tomorrow as someone has organised a get-together of all her friends from this corner of the Gers (SW France) where they used to have a house.
Most of us are Grans, so it will be a like a meeting of the Gers branch of Gransnet smile.

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Iam64 Thu 11-Jun-15 17:58:40

I missed your OP TriciaF and it's so good to hear that the visit went well. flowers

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