Don't know how to feel about being a grandparent.

probably should have posted in a different subject area

I don't think you necessarily get a rush of love when you first hear, especially if it’s unexpected and never been much thought of.
You don’t have to know how to behave, just be happy for them and see how it goes it ll come quietly and unobtrusively if you keep an open mind
It might feel quite different when the little one first grabs your hand in their little fist
Take is easily and quietly and wait and see Don’t expect too much but allow yourself to feel what you want to feel when you want to feel it

Thank you - wise words. It is early days so yes, taking it slowly. I've told a few people and they are mega excited and I am a bit, woooah, steady on.

I couldn't really speak I was so shocked - very happy for DD though.

My younger daughter has recently had her first child and I just said everything is different now and I'm very out of touch so I'm going to rely on you telling me what you would like me to do to help and I'll go by your rules. I'm retired but she lives an hour and half away so I said, if you'd like me to stay with you after you've had the baby, just to help in the house whilst you settle in, all you have to do is ask and I won't be at all offended if you don't want me to come. I also asked if there was something she wanted me to buy for the baby but she and her partner were very keen to buy secondhand as they like to live as "green" as they can. They have bought everything secondhand including baby clothes from vinted. They have not only saved many hundreds of pounds, they've also done their best to save the planet. I've just given them some money.

It's been an easy joyous time. I did stay for a few days when she brought the baby home and it was easy to make myself useful but also to keep out of the way to give her and her partner time together with the baby. I haven't changed a single nappy but I've become adept at knowing when to offer help and most importantly to keep my opinions to myself. I hope your experience is as good as mine has been. I'm not really that "baby minded" and wasn't yearning for her to have a baby but I'm really enjoying my grandchild especially as he's not always around so my life continues pretty much as it did before.

Congratulations Babies bring their love and you need time to get to know your lovely DGC when he/she arrives.

You sound like you’ll be great.

I don't think you necessarily get a rush of love when you first hear, especially if it’s unexpected and never been much thought of.

One of my children is pregnant again.
Wonderful news.
But the baby so far, although a person, is still a blob.
Personally, I wont feel much more than happiness for the parents, until baby is born.
And even then, if dont see them for a while again, [they dont live near], not much will happen, feelings wise, until meet again. etc

I meant to put in the word "agreed", between the quote and my reply.

will definitely be pointing in the direction of vinted. my DD loves a charity shop and vintage stuff so yes that is a good plan,both financially and ecologically. I also plan on crafting blankets for the little one.

My daughter had been married for 10 years with no talk of babies at all when she suddenly told us she was pregnant. My first reaction was that not being a baby person it was all very nice but l wasn't expecting to be involved much. Fast forward till the baby was 6 months old and I was retiring to look after him when she went back to work. I've been deeply involved with him and his brother ever since. You don't know how you'll react when it's all just an abstract idea.

Congratulations!
No need for you to do anything yet. Also, how everyone reacts is different. You just need to take your lead from your daughter. She might want help or not. It is hard to know the expectations of our children as they may be different to the way we reacted when our parents helped us 💐

It's all okay. No big decisions about anything seem expected from you at this time. You could just take it as it comes and let things work out how they will over time, in a happy medium kind of way.

So you plan to buy a pram, that's plenty to have decided so far. Congrats!

mscombobulated

Thank you - wise words. It is early days so yes, taking it slowly. I've told a few people and they are mega excited and I am a bit, woooah, steady on.

I couldn't really speak I was so shocked - very happy for DD though.

You haven't met this new little person yet.

There's a saying "Every baby brings its own love with it" and I'm sure this one will.

I am not a baby person but of course I loved my own two DDs.

I knew the elder one was pregnant cos I was with her when she miscarried. So no surprise that some months later she was prenant again. We were quite involved with both her children as being the chief breadwinner she went back to work but the other GPs were equally involved too. We bought the pram and cooked lots of meals for them. We remained involved till recently now they are both teenagers.

Younger DD now 43 has a 4-month-old after many rounds of IVF. Sadly she is 200 miles away and we are a lot older and in failing health. Her age means she has friends who've all got older kids so they didn't need to buy a thing.

Our sadness is that we won't see much of this child and he might yet acquire a sibling.