moving to be near grandchildren not easy, help!

My daughter, son in law, and my only grandchild less than a year live 4000, km away in Canada. I spent the first five months of my grand-daughters life living as a nanny in their home and it worked well.

I now want my husband of 30 years, father of our daughter to move to the same city as our daughter. I am just retiring and he could do the same, he is 67 years. We could rent for a year and rent out our westcoast home. I am open to ideas...

Full stop. He won't retire, he won't move, he won't talk about this subject. His compromise is that I take an apartment in the kid's city and go back and forth from our westcoast home to the province of our kids.

While I had not imagined leaving my husband, I can't take the intransigence and feel I will take an apartment and see what happens. He says he will work and pay for it. He would like me away no more than 3 months at a time.
It all makes no sense. Don't grown adults work together, find a compromise, is this it? Your view?
What do you think of a husband who agrees his wife can live away for three months at a time, back and forth?