My human must be the worst mum in the world! Today I was belting in from a toilet visit to the garden as it was lashing down and she caught the tip of my tail in the door!!
I yelped I can tell you but because I am a brave dog I also wagged it lots. Mum seemed put out by the amount of blood being sprayed on the kitchen walls, radiator, cupboard fronts and the doors, and also by the trail of drips on the floor 
What is a "chainsaw massacre"?
Now she has tried to bandage it, but I think the choice of a RED bandage was in questionable taste.
I think I might have to swap her for a new mum 
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I think Mum might need to be rehomed 
Poor doggie!
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