Legal wrangle suddenly complicated

Then we (me and my sister) can get K legal representation.

Good idea given the sudden reappearance of this man, I'd say.

It sounds to me the right way to go, but others may know more about this.

He doesn't sound a very useful father, His stepfather is much closer to him. Yet more complications for you - stick in there with it Alie

Quite apart from the legal implications I would hope that the court would take into consideration the rights of a 14 year old to decide with whom he wishes to live.Do the courts have a moral obligation to the children as well as a legal one? Sorry that I have no help to give you.Your worries are ongoing aren't they.

I would think there should be an adjournment so that SS can investigate the 'real' father. If not, you should ask for one. How old is KN? Has he been asked his preference? I think he should have been (unless he is very young).

I think they will talk to the son and see what he wants. I believe at that age they take the child's view in mind quite strongly.

Sorry to hear of the bereavement. Don't come on often enough to see all

Kn has told his father to his face that he wants to stay where he is. He didn't want to come to the court today.

L should definitely be investigated, he has been up in court for dealing drugs - this is online!

Looks like I have said the right things, it was off the top of my head on the phone!

And another query:
L has apparently been sent a copy of the social worker's report on K.

K however was not allowed by her to have a copy - I feel this isn't right and I want to see it too, as from what K says I have been misquoted in it.

Keep stirring it, Alie Your input is at least as good as the natural father's, and K has been in loco parentis to the boy through his formative years.
I can see that perhaps the natural father (I am not saying real father) needs to be considered in the decisions, but not without as much investigation as the stepfather, and giving him a copy of the report before HE has been investigated as thoroughly dosn't sound right to me.

I'm sorry that you have one more thing to worry about Alie - I hope the authorities respect your GS's wishes.

It's unlikely that his natural father really wants parental responsibility, from what you say about his past behaviour, more he's trying to exert some disruptive influence and control.

An American friend had the ludicrous situation some years' back when her ex, long absent and unsupportive, suddenly applied for custody a month before her son was 18 years of age!

She was obliged to engage a lawyer and respond - obviously it all came to nothing a few weeks later when the boy reached 18.

L has now arrived in court with one of the older brothers JB.
I am stirring it.
I have just told K's sister something about JB - who should also be investigated, as I think they are throwing a spanner in all the works by suggesting that KN should live with him!

So sorry to hear this AlieOxon and I hope you get the necessary support without paying an arm and a leg to lawyers. He (L) is clearly after something, and I am glad you are up to the fight. Good luck!

You don't need this alie, indeed, none of you do! Keep the wooden spoon going and tell SS all you know about the the father.

Thanks for support all. I have to go out to get my phone sorted - will update when I can.

Sometimes when you read something like this and see what some of theSS staff have done you wonder if some of them have any common sense or courtesy at all. Fancy giving a report on someone to a third party who sounds a bit iffy when the subject of the report has not been able to see it himself - and neither has the GM in this case. Allie you are obviously so engaged with the family and happy for your GS to stay where he is surely they must take your view into consideration too. - have you been able to give any input to the SS etc yourself Allie?
I hope this is resolved quickly and as you all want - everyone could do with support and less worry and stress. X x

Alie, I know you are doing and will do all you can to keep your GS with K. I hope that your GS will be interviewed by skilled Child Services personnel. It would surely be useful for him to emphasise that he wants to stay with his new half brother which might weigh with those officials who want to keep families together.

Yes anno when he gets to the next lot of SW....

I have not met the SW involved, K dislikes her intensely, I think she has misquoted me in the report, what I said on the phone.
K did see it, but was not allowed a copy!

However, things have been sorted, K gets the parental responsibility, but L is still to be investigated. - I had a call from K as I was on the way out.

L managed to irritate the Judge considerably. How? By leaving it until the last minute to come, arriving later than he said anyway, talking too much, and expecting the judge to read reams of paper!
Judge said he had messed up his day. Good work, L.

JB the brother wasn't even allowed in. Not relevant to this case, I guess.

Oh gawd, what a day. and all that on 4 hours sleep................

Done for now, though Alie have a or a and try to unwind.

Oh Alie what an utter palaver on top of everything else......
Go and put your feet up ( if you can)
whatever vaguely helps x

Thanks. definitely help...I'm having the - and making the !

A very wise and sensible judge. Hope you can relax a bit now, Alie.

Have a rest now. I am sorry you went through all that worry. The outcome should never have been in doubt. At 14 years old the judge will give priority to the child's wishes. His biological father is probably hoping for some sort of access rights, but even then, if the boy does not want to see him then his views will be given priority.

Could K think about a formal adoption when he is feeling a bit stronger?

The ghastly thing in these legal situations is that the people involved feel so impotent - when you are clearly the people who know best about the situation. But SS and the courts have to make sure that all is well and it is right that they look into it all.

It's sorted now so please lie back with a glass of something and heave a sigh of relief.

Glad it seems to be working out despite the SW. I don't know what their rules say but my experience is that there is no logic in what some of them do. Apparently they cannot take note of something they are told unless it is from one of the parents! I doubt that can be true or no one could ever report child abuse. We were also told that if something is in a report it cannot ever be changed. Not even if it is proved to be false!