Giving Lifts - the car variety!

I much prefer driving, rather than being a passenger. Luckily, when being driven, it’s by my DDs or BF - all good, confident drivers.
My S-in-L’s driving (Cheshire) scares me witless! She shouldn’t be allowed out on the roads.

I prefer to drive or be passenger with my OH, we both hold advance driver qualifications…………just do not like being in a moving vehicle with sub-standard drivers. Not saying everyone is, but it’s my choice after all.

I prefer to drive - I usually don't like other people's driving although they probably don't like mine!

I'm happy either way. If I'm a passenger I just switch off and am not troubled by other peoples driving. May not be the most sensible approach but it works!

Depends who it is. I’m happy for any of my dc to drive me and some of my friends. A while back, though, I had a terrifying experience with someone I know fairly well but had never driven me before. She wasn’t familiar with the car she currently had and quite honestly I was surprised to get home in one piece.

She didn’t even know how to start the thing and when we did finally get moving it was a series of bunny hops, in an automatic car!! She then proceeded to drive at 45mph on a (thankfully shortish) stretch of motorway before careering round a roundabout to our destination. Never again!! 👀

I like lifts!

But only if driven by a responsible driver.

I'm ok with lifts if it's with a competent driver. Unfortunately one of my friends still thinks she is a brilliant driver......she isn't!!
Although I no longer drive due to an eyesight problem, I still 'drive' when I'm a passenger. I observe the situation on the road, the traffic lights, pedestrians, cyclists etc.
I am frequently aware of serious mistakes made by my friend, but she has no awareness of having made a poor judgement and commitments on the anger, occasionally obvious in fellow drivers. She being the cause of their anger.
The strange thing is that she consistently sits at roundabouts, missing perfectly safe opportunities to enter. It seems she will only go when there's absolutely nothing coming. A l o n g wait sometimes.!!!
I never say anything to her regarding her driving as I think if I did it would make her very nervous.

Comments.... not commitments

kittylester

If you drive, do you prefer to give lifts or be the recipient of lifts?

I am always happy to drive and give lifts to other people but some times I end up being the passenger. Which is ok generally but, last week I was given a lift to the pub by a friend which was quite scary as she seems to be losing the capacity to think peripherally. Luckily we arrived home safely. But, I think I will stick to my car in future.

I prefer to drive. I give lifts if I must.

I'm not a passenger, apart from with my husband.

After one journey. I know whether I will accept a lift from that person again.

I am just glad that with the arrival of SatNavs, I no longer have to rely on other peoples hand drawn maps/directions or verbal directions from the front passenger. Relying on this type of direction in the past led us to being very late for a funeral and a children's party with other children in the car.

I certainly appreciate a lift as I don't have a car these days.
In getting a lift I always thank the driver and try to reward them with small gifts of appreciation -flowers,plants and sweet gifts such as chocolate or a cake.

One of my long term friends invites me to the plant nursery occasionally .
It's really awkward for me to get to.
I'm conscious that she'd rather go with her best friend and I'm an option.
She likes me to choose plants and advise her. She enjoys talking to other people about her accompanying dog . When I'm there many people overhearing us will ask me about plants.
It's a lovely day out for me and greatly appreciated.
But sadly,my friend likes to remind me that I'm carless.
I feel that her attitude towards me is becoming more and more condescending.
I've known her for coming on 30 years and over the last three years her attitude has changed.
I've particularly noticed it over this past year.

I had a scary trip to the shopping centre with an 81 year old friend. She insisted on driving over the chevron onto the dual carriageway instead of filtering onto the inside lane. Then she wobbled her hands back and forwards as a child might do.I was glad to get home but am wondering should she still be driving.

I prefer to drive unless it’s with my husband. However I can’t afford to let him drive all the time as I have no intention of becoming deskilled either as we spend more time together and his insistence on taking the wheel 😮

I prefer to drive. When my late DH's health was deteriorating, I took over all the driving for family visits, hospital appointments etc. Before that, we used to take turn about driving.

I have a dear friend who has recently returned to driving after suffering a mini stroke last year. I've only been a passenger with her once since then, didn't feel very safe so now I pick her up or meet her at the garden centre.

Tomorrow I will be a passenger in DSis2's car, she's a very capable driver and I feel quite safe with her driving. We had planned to take the train, we're going to see Paul Simon. But there are some problems on the railway so she has kindly offered to drive and I do appreciate it.

Yesterday I met up with friends for lunch. One of them volunteered to pick me up and drop me back, considering I’m about 10 miles from her house. As a reward, I bought her a hanging basket from B&Q. Like most of us, I hate taking advantage of people.

I don’t drive ,,, I’m from the era before driving tests , I bought my driving licence but never could afford a car, have never succeeded in driving comfortably so gave up
But with experience of always sitting in the passengers seat , I can suss out a good driver , I refuse lifts more often than take them .
Not driving is so difficult , but taking a lift is worse unless the driver is a good driver
I wot sit in my sisters ar, anyway I’m stiff and old so she doesn’t ask me

The problem I have with driving is the bus driver kind. Where I live we have some quite wild double decker bus drivers who throw the vehicle around as if possessed. We have a lady bus driver who drives at a terrifying speed whilst admiring her long nails or arranging her hair in the cab mirror. I have actually got off the bus a couple of stops early rather than drive down a big windy hill we have near our town. I was in fear of my life.

Esmay

I certainly appreciate a lift as I don't have a car these days.
In getting a lift I always thank the driver and try to reward them with small gifts of appreciation -flowers,plants and sweet gifts such as chocolate or a cake.

One of my long term friends invites me to the plant nursery occasionally .
It's really awkward for me to get to.
I'm conscious that she'd rather go with her best friend and I'm an option.
She likes me to choose plants and advise her. She enjoys talking to other people about her accompanying dog . When I'm there many people overhearing us will ask me about plants.
It's a lovely day out for me and greatly appreciated.
But sadly,my friend likes to remind me that I'm carless.
I feel that her attitude towards me is becoming more and more condescending.
I've known her for coming on 30 years and over the last three years her attitude has changed.
I've particularly noticed it over this past year.

Interesting that you should say this. We have a WI member like this who seems to think we are her servants and followers if we go out with her. I have refused a few cuppas now at our local tearoom as I find she is losing her 'filter' and becoming very condescending.

I prefer to drive , and I’m happy to drive . I have a few friends who I think are losing confidence in driving , as they make excuses for not driving . We tend to take it in turns to drive . But these women suddenly have car problems when it’s their turn !!! .
One of the reasons I like to drive , is to keep up with driving skills . If your DH always drives and something happens to him , you’re snookered if you won’t drive .

It does depend on who is offering the lift and also on who will be the passenger if I offer people lifts.

I have noticed this is becoming more of a thing as I get older. There are two drivers particularly whose cars I swear I will never get in again. They are both terrible drivers in that they are constantly judging and criticising what is going on around them, instead of just applying their skills to the situation. I really can't stand being in a car with either of them as it is so stressful- with the pair together it is unbearable!
Even being in a taxi with the pair of them is horrible, as they are always telling the driver what to do!
However, if I offered either of them a lift they would refuse because they think no one drives as well as they do!

Several of the replies here mention that their driver giving a lift appeared to be driving dangerously.
This does raise the question as to whether this should be reported to DVLC.
May sound unkind, but a car can be a lethal weapon, not just for the people in the car but other people using the road,etc.

SpinDriftCoastal

The problem I have with driving is the bus driver kind. Where I live we have some quite wild double decker bus drivers who throw the vehicle around as if possessed. We have a lady bus driver who drives at a terrifying speed whilst admiring her long nails or arranging her hair in the cab mirror. I have actually got off the bus a couple of stops early rather than drive down a big windy hill we have near our town. I was in fear of my life.

Can I ask why you haven’t reported her.
There’s no telling the damage and deaths she could cause.
Please make that call before something happens and you could have stopped it.

Franbern

Several of the replies here mention that their driver giving a lift appeared to be driving dangerously.
This does raise the question as to whether this should be reported to DVLC.
May sound unkind, but a car can be a lethal weapon, not just for the people in the car but other people using the road,etc.

Totally agree Franburn
I can never understand why people like my friend who say ^johns driving is getting worse 🤷‍♀️

This is so difficult. One's own life is precious. Other road users and pedestrians lives also. Ihave had a couple of very scary lifts, but also did something quite scary myself when driving. A one off hopefully. I am much more careful and concentrate constantly.

I prefer to drive, but am happy with both DDs driving.. I feel completely confidet in one friend's car, but not another. Luckily at the moment I don't need lifts, but as most of my friends are my age or older I will be concerned about sudden strokes or heart attacks when I getmout and about more. Something I never worried about in the past.
I think I will offer to be the driver. Hopefully they will feel confident with me.

Perhaps I will book to do an advanced driving course.