I am lost since my mom died.

Your grief is understandable. Please look for grief counselling.

You have a small son who needs you. If you don;t cherish your own future, please cherish his, He needs you, You are his Mum. That is the most important thing.

nycdoctor - you certainly need help. Make an appointment with your GP, asap. The part that bothers me is your comment regarding your baby.

Contact your primary right NOW or call suicide line - 988

I am seeing a therapist. My son is the only things that is keeping me here. Not suicidal. My mother would be upset with me, if i did that. I am just telling you guys how I feel.

So sorry about your mum. It’s only two months, your grief is understandable, but with time you will slowly begin to feel better. Your baby needs you and your mum would want you to be happy.
It really will help to talk it through with the therapist.

I think nyc is in the USA

Hi nycdoctor. I’m so sorry for the loss of your mum, heartbreaking, but this is where you step up and put your big girl pants on, your ten month son needs you, you carry on being a great mum and mourn for your dear mum at the same time, I know it sounds grim, but time is the greatest healer, you can do this, you have to❤️

I adored my dad he suddenly died age sixty six without any warning I was devastated. I was separated from my vile and abusive husband at the time. It sounds unreal but my dads death gave me strength to push on for divorce after being intimidated by my husband.
I gained an inner strength I never thought I had and my top priority was my very young children.
You are in pain now of course you are but look at your child your mom lives on through your son. It's difficult but you can do it and you will.

I’m so sorry to hear how you are suffering nycdoctor. I lost my mum last year and so I know how it feels. You must be much younger than me though as you have a baby to take care of, and he needs you. Please try to think about how your mum would have wanted you to be with your little one and let that help you through this terrible grief.

It is such a hard time .... but remember this - just like you, your son is a bearer of your Mum's genes. In other words, he carries a part of your much-loved mother within him. It is his turn to receive the love you felt for your mother. It is a tough time I know, but it is part of the pattern of life. Look after that wee boy of yours!

I'm sorry to hear how much you are suffering. It's good to hear you're getting therapy.

How are you feeling today? Sometimes it's good to talk to strangers on gransnet!

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Nannylovesshopping

Hi nycdoctor. I’m so sorry for the loss of your mum, heartbreaking, but this is where you step up and put your big girl pants on, your ten month son needs you, you carry on being a great mum and mourn for your dear mum at the same time, I know it sounds grim, but time is the greatest healer, you can do this, you have to❤️

^ this.
Go in a corner, have a good sob, then pick yourself up for the sake of your son. Think of it as one life ends, as one life starts, both inextricably linked.
I'm saying this as someone whose mum died 2 weeks before my first son was born and whose dad died 4 months later. Your son needs you and you need him to help you heal.

I lost my mother back in November of 2021 who died in her sleep at 80 years of age.. Even when your parents reach that age we know at least I knew I didn't have that much more time with her..
But I never realized how much I would miss her after her passing... not a day has passed since she died that I don't think about her and still feel guilt for not telling her how much I loved her and how much she meant to me while she was still alive..
Certain things like a old song on the radio or event will bring back precious memories of her that brings me to tears.. What's important now is to show and teach your children and grandchildren that our deceased Christian parents are in a better happier place and one day we will join them in heaven where there will be no more tears and sorrow..

Bluebelle I would have done too.

This OP posted over a year ago.

BlueBelle, how did you find and bump this thread?

I hope the OP is okay. She didn't come back did she?

nycdoctor

I am seeing a therapist. My son is the only things that is keeping me here. Not suicidal. My mother would be upset with me, if i did that. I am just telling you guys how I feel.

You know nothing prepares you for the loss of your mother. I lost mine now 17 years ago when I was in my fifties yet still it hit me hard. I still think about her every day and I cannot believe how time has passed.
She died 5 months after being diagnosed with a fatal cancer so it was a shock to us all.
During the months when she was dying I felt connected to her in an almost mystical way as presumably I had been when in her womb.
I can remember walking to the train station in the mornings , seeing the sun and thinking " these are the last sunrises that she will ever see".
My husband thought that I would never get over it.
I have but you must give it time.
The pain will lessen.
She will be with you always in your memories so you will find eventually that she has not gone at all.....
I wish you courage , particularly as you have to focus on your small son.
That is tough. At least I had no small children to deal with.
Do it for your Mum.
Best of lucK.

The OPs thread is 18 months old.

Feel a bit of a twit.....
How did it get on here (again)??
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Loosing your mother is hard - after all she was part of your life from nine months prior to your birth, if she carried you to term.

We only have one mother, her death hits hard.

Re-read that sentence please and look at your son.

Have you a woman friend or relative who could help?

If your GP is unavailable and grief consellors have waiting lists get in touch with a priest or minister, whether or not you are a believer, or walk into the nearest convent and talk to a nun about how you feel right now.

If phoning to make appointments is beyond you right now, then e-mail the message you posted here to anyone who might just help of your friends, relatives, etc.

Where is your son's father, and why is he not helping you?

Is this only about your mum, or have you post-natal depression as well?

Send me a private message if you just need to "talk". But please find someone in the real world as well as in cyber space to talk to and get qualified help from.

While there is no time limit to grieving after losing a child, a parent, partner or friend, this thread is now nearly 18 MONTHS old and I would hope that OP has found either counselling, comfort or from within herself, the ability to move on.

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