Birthday bash? How

I think Id be inclined to have family on one day and then the friends on another. Id also open windows etc.

Put on some buffet type food and have an open day.

Re sitting, depends on the guest and if they can stand for long periods.

Is there a nice gastro pub or similar you could book a large table? you could pay for everyone if finances allow or just say to everyone it’s approx £x per head for lunch, but I’ll foot the drinks bill - so people know where they stand. But if the groups of friend / family don’t know each other may be best to have separate events.

You could invite 100 as long as you sit in the garden and ask them to BYOB.

It's your birthday - do you really want to cater for it yourself? What about dinner with family at a nice pub or restaurant and afternoon tea out on another day with your friends?

Good suggestions Callistemon. If the OP did afternoon tea with her friends, she could just invite her friends as a ‘ladies’ event which would dispense with needing to invite the husbands too.

I attended an open house buffet event, it went very well. It started at 2 pm and finished late evening. Some popped in for an hour others stayed for the whole time.

I really like the idea of an open house buffet. I was sort of thinking buffet type in the evening, but I'd like to sit down with friends. How would you organise it, plates of salady type things about lunch time, cakes and biscuits etc around tea time, and 'canapes' later on? (with the remains of lunch!)
Tea and coffee on tap (I have one of those catering urns, I could have it in the kitchen). and drinks available for the evening. Would it be very naff to say BYOB?!!!!

Some good suggestions here but whatever you choose to do have a wonderful special birthday.

I'd be inclined to let a company take the strain and hire somewhere.

Justanotherwannabe

I really like the idea of an open house buffet. I was sort of thinking buffet type in the evening, but I'd like to sit down with friends. How would you organise it, plates of salady type things about lunch time, cakes and biscuits etc around tea time, and 'canapes' later on? (with the remains of lunch!)
Tea and coffee on tap (I have one of those catering urns, I could have it in the kitchen). and drinks available for the evening. Would it be very naff to say BYOB?!!!!

Having different food at times seems like hard work to me! I’d provide sandwiches, snacks like sausage rolls, pork pies, vegetable sticks and home made cakes the whole time, topping up the plates as necessary. You could possibly have a cheeseboard and fruit as well. Together with a few bowls of crisps and other nibbles, that would be plenty.

As for drinks, that depends on your budget, I’d provide all the drinks but I know that many of my friends and family would bring something with them anyway. I’d also encourage my guests to help themselves to drinks as I’d want to enjoy the party chatting to friends rather than running around acting as waitress!

Whatever you decide to do, have a great time!

Is a Buffet going to be a problem re Covid, unless your guests keep covering and uncovering the food, or you have someone dishing the food up for your guests? Otherwise I wouldn't want to eat food that was left out with different people using the serving utensils and breathing all over it.
I would do afternoon tea with my lady guests.
Then invite family separately.
It seems an awful lot of hard work for you though, I would get a local caterer in.

would you really have bowls of nibbles around for different people to put their hands into? It’s a bit like blowing out the candles on a Birthday cake, might be ok for kiddies but no adult is going to huff and puff over something I’ve eaten any more.
Of course I’m excluding all food made for me in restaurants !???

There are companies that deliver afternoon tea to your home if you don’t want to go out. Some even include the china too. Plus bubbles, or you could buy your own bubbles. Otherwise choose a little hotel and go on a week day. It won’t be busy then, I’m thinking Covid here, so you don’t need to worry about that. Ask all guests to lateral flow test before they arrive.

Doing a day long running buffet by yourself doesn’t sound like much fun, you’ll be dashing about getting drinks and food for everyone and not being able to relax much.

It sounds like a nightmare to me!

I've done it (pre-Covid) for DH but did have help from family.

We've got our golden wedding coming up later this year, and we want to invite people who weren't asked to the wedding, including of course friends we've made since then. I think we'll hire the community hall and gardens and maybe have a picnic/BBQ etc.
I will get caterers in for that, but I don't think I can justify the expense twice in one year!

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Now that you have told us about the Golden Wedding later on this year, I would suggest making your birthday a ladies only afternoon tea, then an evening meal out with just close family. The other friends + husbands and other family will no doubt be invited to the Golden Wedding, so make your birthday special for just you, with as little work as possible..

We had a low key wedding last year (when there were still restrictions), with a lunch at a local restaurant, then and about 40 people back for the evening do, with a local DJ and gazebo in the garden.

To save me having to do too much, my 3 young nephews were "hired" to serve drinks and go round with nibbles, sandwiches etc from a local caterer, and to help tidy up afterwards. It saved them from being bored and they earned some money!

I too would suggest a buffet lunch or dinner and make sure that there were chairs for those who cannot stand.

If too many of your guests need to sit down, then either invite in batches (tiring, I know) or work out how many you want to invite and make no bones about stating that the four ladies are, due to the limited space, invited without their husbands.