After death

I just started reading this post for a few minutes whilst waiting for the washing machine to finish!

I ended up reading every post, and am now sat here crying, not from sadness.

Such lovely stories, Thankyou for sharing

I have been watching 'Who Do You Think You Are' DVDs and it's astonishing just how much history repeats itself. Has anyone else noticed that?

Many people featured find relatives they previously knew nothing about, who have lived lives similar to their own.

Lyndiloos experience with her granddaughter echoes many thousands of similar remarks made by small children.

My own son, when a baby, was scared of water and hated being carried downstairs.

At 2-3 he began to remember details of flying a Lancaster bomber (only later did we identify the make of plane), spiralling down after being hit and ditching in the sea where, as his memories stopped, we presume 'he' drowned.

When, at 6, he actually got to sit in a Lancaster, he told the man in the museum what every control was for and told me later, 'It smelled just as I remembered in Mum.'

Echoing Witzend's post, I do think that we are reborn - and sometimes to the same family that we have loved before.

When my granddaughter was about three she said to my husband, "Granddad, you used to be in my tummy." We both looked at each other, over her head, a bit shocked at this statement. Husband then tentatively asked her, "What was your name?" To which she replied, "Mummy!"

We did laugh at this! (As we were both fascinated, wondering if she would say the name of his mum.)

Makes you think, though ...?

My body will die and turn to dust in time but my DNA will continue in the bodies of my children and grandchildren.

PS re 'signs' - after my lovely MiL died too young, for several days I had a very strong sense of her presence in our house, where she'd always loved visiting. I could almost 'see' her sitting on the sofa.

Of course I put it entirely down to my imagination, and when my beloved father died only 6 months later I fully expected my imagination to behave the same way.

But there was nothing. Zilch.
So it did make me wonder.

My head says you die and that's it.

OTOH I have experience of very young children talking very matter-of-factly about 'before'.

Most recent (and spooky!) case involved a friend's little grandson. The family had visited a site of Graeco-Roman antiquities, where none of them had ever been before. The little Gds had not yet learned to read, so there was no question of his having read anything about it.

He said straightaway, 'I used to live here!' and went on to point out where he'd lived, where a friend had lived (he even named him with a more or less appropriate name) and described how they'd played at hiding in the cave (still there) and swimming in the pool (remains of bath still there.).

Needless to say, the whole family had the hairs on the back,of their necks standing on end!
He was quite matter of fact about it all, and after they left, thanked everyone for 'bringing me home'.
Spooky or what?

Anniebach wrote:

"I believe we are healed after death"

Socrates said the same as he was about to die. He was about to be healed of living. The message was that this world is incurably full of evil . The heroes are those who, whether they are religious or not, take up the cross as well as they can.

I completely agree Anniebach.

Everyone copes in ways they can, there is no right or wrong way ,

I more or less believe as you do Luckygirl but after doing some study on neuroscience of religion, find that there's much more too it than simple brain behaviour. It appears to be multidisciplinary and how the relationship between mind and body work together. Functional MRI scans can light up bits of the brain during religious feelings or activity for example, but doesn't show how the brain interprets these. There are some interesting talks on Neurotheology on U tube for anyone interested.

One of the women in the group I (used) to go to looks for signs, all the time, every day.
However tenuous it is, she chooses to see it a sign, and it comforts her.

Thank you Anniebach. X

Yes I think you are right MissAd.
I think sometimes something that reminds us of our loved one could be construed as a sign. Who knows. There are clearly many many things that we do not know or understand.

I do agree that you see "signs" when you look for them.

I experienced that after a bereavement but it was sort of as if the things that I connected with that person, which were/are always there (ordinary objects/songs/smells/sights) became bathed in light/highlighted/louder because my mind so desperately wanted a connection with that person.

So walking through town, I would see their favourite book in the window of a shop, hear a song they liked on the radio.

They werent "contacting" me, my mind just saught and found connections

Bikerhiker. Your daughter is in your heart, as she was when she was in your womb , hugs x

I suppose some people are more likely to see signs, if they are expecting that their loved one is around, and trying to make contact.

I belong to a group of recently bereaved parents. Many say that they get signs from their children and this gives them great comfort. I have not dreamed or had what I could perceive as signs from my daughter. I wish I had. I hope that a day will come when I can feel that my child is safely tucked in my heart.

Beechnut, I would only need to shout BREXIT and my husband would come running!

I always think about the meeting again thing.......what if we can’t find one another......

I think it must be comforting for some folk to think their relative is sitting on a cloud but it doesn't work for me,

If people get comfort from thinking their loved ones are hovering around, watching, its not for me to say otherwise.
I belong to a group for bereaved parents, and sometimes they will talk about their relative sitting on a cloud, along with everyone else's relatives, looking down..
Lets just say I don't 'get it' at all. (Wish I did)

I would not want my dear loved ones to watch me going to the bathroom except for dear dead dogs they may watch.

I think that sometimes people who think their loved ones are "watching" put a lot of pressure on themselves: guilt if they miss a grave visit, shame at what they might think about how things turned out etc.

My loved ones are gone. And I miss them. But they arent hurting, or watching, or judging, or waiting for me etc, they are off the hook, gone, free.

People "live on" in DNA and I love seeing traits of them in the younger generations.

Who decides who meets who again anyway? It wont always be mutual!

Gosh! I think like you Notanan but I don't feel reassured that my dear dead ones are gone forever from me. I do find it slightly reassuring tho think that better people than I have ceased to be so surely I can resign myself to ceasing to be.

There is the consolation that the dead and soon to be dead won't have to worry about whale hunts and other horrors.

Same thing that happened to my pot plants and the kids goldfish or a spider that gets trapped in the bath. Decomposition etc.

We are just one species of animal, no different in death than any other.

I find it reassuring that this isnt a rehersal, theres no test. Just this, try to make the most of it.