Support for Grans cut-out of AC&GC lives

So sorry about all those sad "anniversary" dates, ladies. We all have a few, I suppose, birthdays or "death days" of loved ones who are deceased, etc. But I imagine it's much harder when they come in the context of estrangements or if they are birthdays of the living loved ones that one is estranged from. xx

It's so hard yogagirl ?For yourmsad anniversarynof being cut out, ours isn't until march I still feel goosebumps thinking of letter xxx wrote telling me I was t good enough to see my little Grandaughter.

When our lovely cleaner (young girl) asked me why I told her and she said dh and I were kindest most caring people she knew bless her, after I told her xxx said we abused her.

It's not good beinsad and dwelling on it all just losing Rosie has bought it all to surface.

Maddyone will be onboard now hope she has amazing time and pray all goes well with daughter when she returns.

Rhinestone like me yourmsad date near Xmas ours is 17th Dec date my beloved father in law passed.
My dear dad passed Nov 4th 1970 so long ago now he wasn't perfect but I loved him and would never ever have stopped him seeing his grandkids, sadly he didn't live to see any as was only 60.

My husband died just after Christmas Day, it is always hard, I never mentioned it with family or friends, for them it's the best time of the year, I enjoyed it in some way every Christmas, loved my c and gc bring happy, it gets harder with estrangement though.

Oh lucklegs how sad ? How long ago was this that you sadly lost your husband?
It must be so much worse with estrangement but at least you have your son like us. ?

We have just arrived at our sons about an hour ago, one of his stepsons is looking after us. Was v good journey ds in London today so will be bit late back.
Is 185 miles I managed drive last 60.
Their new home seems lovely. Can't wait see our son!

Have a lovely time Celebregran.
Wish my pain would go away, finding it all so difficult just doing everything.
Have a lovely weekend everyone.?

Yes Rhinestine these common dates are interesting, as Smileless can testified to, beings as her DH & GS share the same birth date!

Yes starlady the nearer the dates get the worse I feel, thought I'd be better this year, but not Just got over my Son's birthday & Dad's passing day, now in5 days time the 5th anniversary of my being 'cut out', week after that my estD's 28th Birthday & then Xmas

Have a lovely time at your Sons Celebgran

Lucklegs This pain is with us for life, even if we reunited! My ND & I were talking about this just yesterday, agreeing that our precious L&J will be quite gown now, missed all their growing up

Well this weekend must rate as one of the worst ever. Took my little boy to be groomed on Friday and got a call from the groomer asking me to go and fetch him (at least 15 mins. early). When I arrived she was as white as a sheet and shaking and my boy was bleeding, yes bleeding.

He's a tiny thing, white fur and as is often the case there was quite a significant amount of blood even though where she'd caught him wasn't deep. So there we both were, crying and shaking; I felt sick TBH. I'm not good with blood especially when it's my fur baby whose bleeding, so lots of apologies later and her saying she'd understand if I didn't want her to groom her again (I do), and that if I need to take him to the vet she'll pay, and she wasn't charging me for the groom, I went home.

Back to my computer where I'd been for hours catching up on all the business' accounts from our time away when the bloody thing went dead. Dead as in nothing, nothing at all. 'Phoned Mr. S. in a blind panic who reassured me that he'd sort it when he got home; only he can't.

Now even as a technophobe I know the importance of backing up, which I do religiously on my 'stick' (external something or other). Being a trusting technophobe, when my computer tells me my back up's complete I believe it but it turns out that it hasn't backed up since June 2016.

So, when we thought 'this isn't too bad, we can reload the accounts package and then restore the data from the backup disc, we were wrong.

I suppose the good news is that being an old fashioned kind of a gal I make hard copies every month; print everything off so at least I haven't lost everything I just have to work out the best way of getting back on track but I won't be able to collate everything for our year end because as far as the computer program's concerned I've 'lost' the first quarter.

I know I'll be able to work out the best way of sorting this out but at the moment my head hurts and I'm clueless.

Luckylegs I don't think the pain ever does go away, just becomes less intense so hang on in there.

Yogagirla lot of sad anniversaries for you this month.

Celeb I hope you've enjoyed seeing your DS. Just under 6 weeks to go before I can give DS a great big hug and look forward to having him here for Christmas.

Oh smileless ?What a shame and worry for your groomer too. Luckily Rosie never had that sad experience and she had a lot of age bumps on her skin I never know how groomer managed not to nick her.
Hope he is ok now and you too!

Did you managed among all mishaps to give thought to being able join us next march ? Understand if you didn't.

It was marvellous see our dear son idiot me was texting their old landline not his mobile so didn't realise he was away in London day of arrival, but his younger stepson looked after us til his mum got in and Cooked us lovely dinnner.
We were spoilt and they are so rightly thrilled with their lovely home.
We were cooked lovely roast beef yesterday and treated breakfast out, so we got them lunch on way home today,
I feel so pleased managed it ok 185 miles each way we were so lucky with traffic and I was ok!
I just feel so much better seeing our son and wonder if we should try move nearer think we will in end.

Yogagirl sorry it's sad anniversary time! Nothing I can say will make it better, but thinking of you.
Our dear son never wants talk about his sister and to be honest there isn't anything nice to say with her ignoring our heartbreak over Rosie,

Did shed few tears when w sat on settee with cuppa and no Rosie posie barking to tell me off for leaving her?

Sorry smilless about your computer glitch they are pain when not working.
Especially when you do company accounts ?

Glad you will see your son at Xmas,
Greedy me seeing mine again too. I said to him hugs have last me 6 weeks, so I got an extra one?.

Oooh that extra hug sounds wonderful Celeb.

Not managed to sort anything out for next March yet with all of our computer problems but hopefully will get sorted next week.

Mr. S. is in the office with a new something or other, trying to get it sorted but I'm leaving it until tomorrow as I can't quite get my head around it.

Celeb, what a great weekend, so glad you enjoyed it. It must be so good for you and Gra seeing them happily settled in a home they love and making you welcome in. How can two siblings be so different? It's a puzzle to me.
Smilekess, what a horrible experience at the dog groomers, but no lasting damage was done thank goodness, the computer will get repaired. How did I miss that your son

was coming for Christmas? Has it been arranged for some time? That will give you just the boost you need, bet you can't wait to to spend time with him and his wife of course.
Yogagirl, I completely understand about anniversaries, this year I am have arranged theatre and meal with friends on my worst date, it is what he would have wanted, I remember him with love and am glad he was in my life for so long, he used to say life's for living, make the most of each day. He was right, believed on looking on the bright side and putting a smile on. Sometimes I forget that, but it is really the only way forward.
Have had a lovely weekend, it makes such a difference having company, I feel the old me again. (For a while anyway).
Love to everyone.x

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Thanks lucklegs it was marvellous to feel loved and wanted, we too think how can his sister just not care at all, especially given She knew the major surgery I underwent, when her brother drove 200 miles had time off work and is constantly looking out for me.

Try keep positive lucklegs and enjoy the outing,
I too have planned weekend away for my ed birthday in Jan as it always hurts.
Our 2nd Gra daughter birthday in Jan too we only found date out last year when shen was 6??

Thanks lucklegs for being so pleased for us, and hope your having ok day today ??

Photos of us with dear son and partner and dh outside house,

What a lovely photo, celeb. Is it my eyes, or does your son look like you? Can see he gives big hugs. As for moving, it's a big step away from all the friends you have, leaving an area you know and love can be hard too. I did consider moving to be by my son, but they are out at work all day and realistically I know they would have their own lives to get on with, so I decided against it. My friend however, did move and sees her two daughters daily, she said she doesn't miss anyone or anything, her daughters more than make up for the move. I miss her, only seen her once in a year, we met every week before the move with out fail,went on
holidays etc. Everyone is different, I wouldn't be seeing mine daily and would miss my friends. All families are different and it would probably work for you. Your d and gc are the losers more the pity. It is such a very long time for you not you have seen your d, and your precious gc, especially after your operation and Rosie dying, it is cruel and I so wish you d would realise what she has done to you all., not even letting you know your gc births. ?You are very brave, like Smileless and Yogagirl, making a new life, despite the pain.

Thanks lucklegs yes think my son does take after me.

He is a lovely chap not that I am biased.

It takes lot thinking about as we do have lot friends my twin brother, and nephew and little ones this area.
Just feel sad we only able meet ever month or two with distance,

I will always miss my daughter like you,saw her most weeks and texted or spoke daily if only she would talk
To us and give us chance to put things right.
Surely I can't have done anything so bad to deserve being cut out completely for so long but not good dwelling on it,

Have been invited join a British small closed group for estranged parents seems good but brings all up again which not sure is good,

SmilelessHow upsetting for you. We once had a dog that’s stomach was bleeding because the groomer shaved too close to the skin. Your poor baby must have been scared.
And the technology problems are a nightmare aren’t they? We can’t live without it now but when things go wrong it makes my blood boil.
CelebgranWhat a wonderful picture. You all look so happy.
I’m up early as I have anxiety. I could not stop crying last night. I haven’t been feeling well and went to two doctors and they can’t find anything wrong. I feel like I’m losing my mind.
To add to all of this my ES is going with his father on Thanksgiving , the father who physically abused him. My DD will be there and her children will be with her X and his family. So here we are having four children and we are alone with my mother. I am thankful to have her here still but this holiday used to be fun with cousins and aunts and uncles. It seems like everyone has passed on or the cousins go to their own families. And with divorce ... families are broken up. But my son going to his abusive dad hurts my heart. I know I was a loving and kind mother. But his estranging us because we told him his behavior was inappropriate ( yelling at his sister in a restaurant) is rude and disrespectful to the person who treated him with love.

Aagh thanks rhinestone!

I am always so happy when being with our son, despite he wasn't too well bless him.

So sorry you feeling unwell ?. Try and just let it be,
I saw s i law on twitter giving talk at Grandaughters primary school it upset me,

However I want to get the calmness back I had before we lost Rosie ! The sadness of losing her has brought all heartbreak over my daughter to surface,

Yes poor little dog must been scared, Smilelss is v forgiving I wouldn't go back, in 14 half years rosie was never cut by groomer and we used several later years stuck to same one as poor baby had so many age bumps.

Must get off here meant to be making beef casserole got start doing more!

We had lovely relaxing day out yesterday,

Lot's of posts since I was last on Sunday.
Sorry to hear about your little furchild Smileless hope it wasn't too bad & just lot's of blood, bad enough I know. When my little Lilly had her op, the week after she was sooo ill, it was horrid! Like you Smileless I've been off-line since Monday morning, due to changing my provided, the switch over was to be just a blip, yah right! 3 days without, when I finally got back on yesterday, I had 90+ emails to go through So no time to come on here
I was saying to my ND, that not may years back, I had no Internet, no laptop, never went on-line for anything, now, I buy most things on-line, even 'home delivery' now!
Only read Smileless post, will read others later....

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5 years today! My eyes my not tear, but my heart cries each and every day!

Lovely pics Celebgran

Love & Hugs to you all in this same sad sad boat. How could our once loving children treat us, their good, kind, gentle Mothers, so cruelly, for so long!

To that we have no answer yogagirl and my heart goes out to you because we can never get those years back.

They look such lovely children is it quite recent photo? Hope that's not stupid question.

So proud of myself went acquacsie alone today and swam 12 lengths!

Got busy weekend coming up dance with band we love tomorrow annual do Inc fish chip supper then sat. Disco at club with different friends Sunday lunch with more friends where would we be withOut them?

Good see our little great niece and nephew yesterday xxxxxx is walking v well now, and xxxxxx is settling in at school bless her.

Been busy all day sorting out our computer/accounts problem so haven't had time to catch up on all of your posts.

Got to get ready to go out and celebrate Mr. S's. birthday today; 64and still gorgeous. We're going out for a meal and will raise a glass to our youngest GC who shares his grand dad's birthday and it 2 today.

Oh Smilelss bittersweet celebration for you.

Enjoy meal and all best from me and mr c x???

I almost Can't bear it for you both it's just too cruel for words little one 2 and doesn't know you.

I realise same for us except xxxxx is nearly 7 and xxxx is 4 we think but never see. Either only xxxxxx we were allowed to love for 9 short months,

Sorry this isn't meant to be doom and gloom post have a fun evening we can't let it ruin the life we do have.

Morning girls, cold one today

Celebgran photo is about a year after we were all cut out, my ND got it for me off the Internet, probably estD FB [I can't remember now] So to all those trolls that berate us Grandmothers for sharing pics of our loved ones, we got the pics off the parents posting them in the first place My GD looks just like her mum & in turn she looked just like me at the same ages!
Well done on your aqua C

Happy Birthday to MrS & your youngest GS Smileless, I hope you had a lovely evening, sure you did. Even though we don't get to see our beloved GC, they are still our GC & will be till the end of time!