Who has set my 7 year old GDG against me

Sounds normal enough for a child of that age who only visits occasionally and is overwhelmed by your emotion , I ignore my lot till they come round a bit and suss that I don' t bite

I don't think it's anything to do with your brain injury. Children can be very nervous with people (even grandparents) who they don't know that well. Give her time. It will be easier as she gets older and understands more.

Would it be possible to have an open discussion with your granddaughter and her parents about your injury.
Sometimes times when things are not explained to children the become very worried.

My father in law had a brain operation before our children were born and they seem to except how he was.
However when DC were about your DGD age
I overheard a conversation between them about how scary their grandfathers face was.
I explained that he had had an operation on his brain that saved his life
but unfortunately it had paralysed the side of his face.
They completely excepted my explanation and became quite proud his brain operation .

So maybe an explanation of your condition may be helpful.
And then just make sure that how ever long your DG is with you it is a happy smiley time.

Sorry too many maybe's

I'd say its normal for a small child and certainly not to do with you or your injury. She will react differently as she grows up and things will get easier please don't let it upset you so.

my 7 year old grandaughter tells me her other gran and granpa are her "favourites" and thats fine,Other granny never tells her off for anything.....I'm not quite so indulgent. Dont worry about it ,its quite normal for kids to be that way at that age,mine also wont go upstairs on her own despite the fact she's lived half of every week with us since she was just over a year old

OMG, it's a kid! Kids go through all kinds of phases. I would be careful of crying in front of her about it and making her feel responsible for your feelings. Just continue to be nurturing and supportive and she will grow out of it. Also, wanting her dad with her at all times is completely normal. What's not normal is being so upset over it.

Ah, the joys of grandchildren, ganmaj! Just let it wash over you. She's maybe a little shy, being unused to your home. And who knows, she may be telling her other grandparents how great you are. There's good advice here from Cherrytree59 about explaining your brain injury, if you think that might be a problem. But do try not to fret over what children say and do - they're a notoriously fickle bunch!

Thank you so much everyone who responded . I don't cry in front of her of course not.
My brain injury shows up only in my oversenditive responses to hurt..
I had no family of my own, was brought up by a foster mother. So it's such a help to have the wash of common sense that you all have, that shrunk my problem Quite a lot

Good for you ganmaj

it does sound like normal 7 year old behaviour. Are they maybe not staying over night so as to not wear you out? I know that when we go to see relatives who are ill or frail they invite us to stay but I don't think they realise just how full on and exhausting DDs can be so we'll usually get a B&B nearby. It's not because any of us don't like them it's just that although I'm sure the offers are genuine, I do think people forget how tiring kids can be.

oh and BTW once my DD (I think she was 7 at the time actually) ranked me, her father and her sister in order of preference at the dinner table. She didn't realise it was hurtful until we explained it to her

Other times the girls will go through phases of prefering me or their dad and being quite clingy to one of us. It's normal.

How do we know this little girl is 7 ?
If she lives abroad and doesn't see you very often she will be shy and unsure of you and certainly won't want to go upstairs alone with you. My grandson in NZ is now 16 but we have only met about 4 times when he saw me when he was about 6 I was warned before they came not to try kissing him as he was very shy so I didn't, I was welcoming and kind but kept my distance and didn't do any kissing or cuddling,he has never really got to know me very much he's not much of a conversationalist but we re both fine with it He's the only one of my 7 grandkids who acknowledges any photos I put on FB I think we have a total regard for each other and he is treated exactly the same as the others for birthdays Christmas etc There are different ways to have a relationship xx
Don't worry too much, accept it as it is, she may come round or she may not but your love must be unconditional and certainly don't waste tears over it

How do we know this little girl is 7 ?

OP states that she is 7 in the thread title "who has set my 7 year old GD against me"

OP it all sounds normal for a 7 year old to go through phases like this - it is also the age where they change "best friends" several times a week. Perhaps you could keep in touch with her via Skype or similar when she is not in the country

My first GD who I see for 2 months each year (in Oz) wouldn't have anything to do with me from
the age of 12 months. She screamed and squirmed, cried and kicked. Didn't want me to bath her, read to her or even push her on a swing; even looking at her would set her off. It wasn't pleasant but once she got to 7 she changed completely and now we get on like a house on fire - talk about a turn around. I've had the same problem with her 4 year old sister although when they were in the UK at Christmas we did have some very good conversations and she allowed me to read her stories and play games, which is a break through. Their 2 brothers are completely different and love to be with me and are very affectionate. So ganmaj bear with, be patient, don't show you are upset and one day things will change!