Estate Agent's language

Deedaa I had to raise 4 children in a house with 1 bathroom! Getting everyone clean and ready for school/work in the morning was an absolute nightmare! Piles of towels and clothes keeping their places outside the bathroom door, and constant banging and screaming to get out.

Now there are 2 of us and 2 bathrooms. So much easier.....until all of the family come to stay over Christmas and Easter holidays (15 people!)

We are in the process of marketing our house. We have not allowed the estate agent to over exaggerate anything. It waste viewers time and ours.

We have had comments about no ensuite, despite having two separate upstairs bathrooms and two obvious places for ensuites to be put in, should one wish.(?)
Some people are never satisfied and obviously enjoy cleaning loos!

I also remember Roy Brookes' adverts, a shame they are not still around.
x

DD who lives upstairs in a two bedroom apartment, has, one bedroom downstairs with ensuite bathroom, a shower room/toilet all mod cons upstairs and, a bedroom upstairs with an ensuite bathroom. Bit of overkill on the part of SILs Mother in the design I think. DD has told hubby if he wants to use both of the upstairs ones he has to clean one of them. He does.

vq brilliant. Sold to rq after I have got rid of 'ideal family home giving the purchaser a wonderful opportunity to update and put their own stamp on the property'

Why do they say 'Viewing Advised'
As if anyone would say, 'no no I insist on buying it, sight unseen. I'm sure it's lovely, going by your description.....'
So, if the agent doesn't say 'Viewing Advised', does that mean the property is not worth looking at?

If you had three teenagers in the house you might be very grateful for extra bathrooms!

Roy Brookes was wonderful! All those bedrooms which would be ideal for a dwarf

I don't know why there is this mania for multiple en suite bathrooms. Why would I want to spend my days cleaning multiple loos?

Given that the S.O. is in the process of selling two properties [not as grand as it sounds] I wondered what is the main thing that puts people off a property when viewing. With me it's seeing a bathroom or kitchen that has obviously been done to a high standard but isn't to my taste; would rather have something that I can replace in a style that I like.

I believe they were very successful - people went to view them in droves, which is the first step to a sale. I used to read them all and I wasn't even house hunting.

Yes I remember them annsixty - it was the Sunday Times as I recall and we used to have a laugh over them every Sunday!

Does anyone else remember the wonderful "Houses for sale" ads by Roy Brooke's (I think) in the 60's? They were in one of the "quality " papers and mostly in the Home Counties, when I was working they were required reading at lunchtime and really told it as it was. I didn't know how effective it was at selling houses but I guess people went to view and then realised they were not as dire as described.

Brilliant, vampirequeen!
Can I make an appointment with the vendors for a viewing?
Kirsty will be with me of course...

vq

We are proud to be able to offer a modern, bijou, single story residence. The kitchen, albeit compact, has a built in fridge/freezer, microwave and oven/hob and a unexpectedly large amount of storage space. The through lounge/dining room has been skilfully zoned into comfortable seating and stylish dining areas which can be used discretely or as one large living space. The property boasts fitted bedroom furniture including a king-size bed, a single bed on the ground floor and a second single bed in the mezzanine. There is a shower room with toilet and sink unit. The property is tastefully decorated and carpeted. It also enjoys warm air central heating throughout.

There is also an imposing sun room which almost doubles the square footage of the property and offers a range of possible uses such as an extra seating/dining area or bedroom.

The property offers imposing country views from all windows.

Otherwise known as our four berth caravan

When we were selling a big old house many years ago the Estate Agent described the large cupboard under the stairs with a scruffy old sideboard built in as "The Butler's Pantry."

So many prospective buyers expressed disappointment when they saw the Butler's Pantry that I had to tell the Estate Agent to remove the description.

I would take out the extra bathroom and replace it with a walk in wardrobe!
I don't see the need for all these en suite bathrooms, so unnecessary.

Also - why nowadays do there have to be so many bathrooms - one for each bedroom. I am in the process of downsizing to a two bedroom flat with two bathrooms and would much rather have a larger second bedroom/living room/kitchen than the second bathroom.

We were house hunting, back in the '70s, and looking at agents particulars.
One property appeared to be an absolute bargain.
"Is it next to the gas works?" I joked. He laughed. We drove out there.
It was next to the gas works.
Ruddy time waster! I was livid with him for not telling me.

Isn't estate-agent speak responsible for "leafy suburb", a ridiculous expression that has now passed into common usage?

I find it amazing that kitchens are described as having sinks with draining boards in them. I did not expect anything less and preferably also a tap or taps with running water.

A quirky staircase probably means that it is narrow, spiral and needs work.

Our first house which we bought in 1970 for £1750 was a 'quasi-semi' - a two-up, two-down end terrace

I don't like houses described as "boasting" eg an en-suite or extensive gardens. Houses can't boast!

Desirable is another overused word, same as compact, and also convenient.

We went to look at a house with "a natural garden" - it was so natural that you couldn't actually get through to the bottom of it.

Another, more truthful one, offered the following description, "Bathroom with bath and light switch"

Yes - 'in need of some modernisation' means the same, Charleygirl!