Informal childcare - now it’s ok

I can see why the decisions being made seem arbitrary but as much as it would be nice to say, "Everybody stay home until this virus has gone," it just isn't possible. Whether we like it or not, we need money to live, the country needs money to support the vulnerable and no illness is every going to be able to trump that. This is such a balancing act for every Government in the world and decisions being made very much depend on the cultural beliefs and liberalism amongst the population. You only have to read a thread about it on Gransnet with supposedly mature, intelligent people talking about bending the rules "just a little" to suit their situation. There is absolutely no point in saying you can't do this or that where it cannot be policed. The reality is, we do need to look after the economy to a degree and to do that, parents need to work. They often can't send their children to childcare facilities so need family to help. Each grandparent needs to make their own decision, it is not up to the Govt to police their decisions.

Hetty58 - I totally agree with your sentiments and fortunately DH and I are in a position to minimise the risk. We usually look after our youngest grandson but have agreed to pay for a day at Nursery instead. We do miss seeing him and the other grandchildren but it is what it is at the moment.

Totally agree with Dwmxwg, I've cared for my primary school age grandchildren as usual since the start, my daughter & son-in-law are both key workers. I've also had to use buses daily as we don't have a car. Plenty of GPs at the school socially distancing, wearing masks & being sensible. The school staff are doing a great job of keeping the children as safe as possible. We're making sure we wash & clean thoroughly when we get home. Obvious common sense.

Teacheranne Well said

icancsendthemback You have summed it up beautifully.

Well done!

Hetty58

Of course the advice is that granny can babysit. It's good for the economy. Yes, it's dangerous and granny might die - but that saves on the pensions bill - so a win win situation from the government point of view!

Absolutely as Hetty says. I also fear that, as cases of covid increase, grandparents who are worried and would prefer to shield will find it difficult or impossible to say ‘no’ to their adult children and as someone else said, what are young adults supposed to make of the message ‘keep your distance, don’t kill granny’ in light of this. It’s just more mixed messages and incompetence from this useless government.

Ferret. Exactly! Heaven forbid that young people should have their lives disrupted! Some of the reported responses from young people when interviewed, such as “ I don’t care about the oldies cos if they die it’ll leave more room for other people “.
“I’m going to go out and enjoy my life so what!” There were many more but I won’t waste space on them.
It is sad that at a time when many young people have done so much in so many ways to help, that others are behaving like selfish morons. I would like to put them in a ward with Covid19 patients so that they may see for themselves, at first hand, the suffering, misery and sadness that this wretched virus causes.
I survived but had to watch others die ! And many who have recovered are suffering long term after-effects - they are the ones whose lives are being ‘inconvenienced’ !

Thank you for your support nana58, appreciate it - all I will say to teacheranne is I’m breaking no rules but if anyone dear to me phoned me in middle of night in dire need I’d drop everything and go help out. Wouldn’t anyone??

I don’t want to catch Covid 19. As soon as my GC went back to school I said I wouldn’t be looking after them until after lockdown.IMO it’s kids being back at school that has led to this second wave. We should have locked down earlier but thanks to our at best incompetent and at worse corrupt government we are going to be restricted for a very long time. They should have got testing and track and trace fully implemented by now, but they haven’t. They’re blaming social interaction while ignoring the biggest factor in spreading viruses - children.

I collect 3 grand-daughters from their schools 3 afternoons a week. Both the schools have sensible safety measures in place and I am so pleased to have this little bit of normality back in my life. I struggle to see how Boris can book a date for a lockdown. Surely if the 'R' date is going haywire he will need to act immediately, whenever that time may be.

Icanhandthemback....well said! This is an international problem so there is little point making any kind of political criticism. Let’s stick to the rules and try to be kind to each other.

icanhandthemback

I can see why the decisions being made seem arbitrary but as much as it would be nice to say, "Everybody stay home until this virus has gone," it just isn't possible. Whether we like it or not, we need money to live, the country needs money to support the vulnerable and no illness is every going to be able to trump that. This is such a balancing act for every Government in the world and decisions being made very much depend on the cultural beliefs and liberalism amongst the population. You only have to read a thread about it on Gransnet with supposedly mature, intelligent people talking about bending the rules "just a little" to suit their situation. There is absolutely no point in saying you can't do this or that where it cannot be policed. The reality is, we do need to look after the economy to a degree and to do that, parents need to work. They often can't send their children to childcare facilities so need family to help. Each grandparent needs to make their own decision, it is not up to the Govt to police their decisions.

Well said icansendthemback.
Agree with Teacheranne too.

Don't parents need childcare when they are working from home? Difficult to work and look after children at the same time! I'm fine with looking after our grandchildren, if it becomes a problem, e.g. if there is an outbreak of covid19 at their school then I'd rethink, but for now, carry on as I've been doing since June

Congratulations Calendar37
I'm delighted to hear of your recovery from Covid
Don't we all just relish the good news?

Parents working from home are delighted to have a Nana who can take the children for a day or two as they are the only days the parents can actually work some semblance of 9 to 5. We have our 2year old grandson 2 days a week - the other days the parents take it in turns to care for the little chap but they have to make up their hours by working for hours after he's gone to bed.
Not easy for anybody but we will get there.

Same here!

Hetty58 and Bagatelle, isn't it awful that we have these thoughts about our Government? But I think we are right to think this, as has been said State Pension ( although the amount paid is abysmal) could be clawed back by said Government. How many pensioners have died, perhaps unnecessarily, within the last 6 months through catching the virus, and having underlying ailments as well?

School buses comes into housing estate. Even though children have about 100 yards from houses to where bus stops adults escort them and are there again for return. No social distancing on either occasion. Primary and secondary school kids out playing together- again no distancing for 12 years and over. Some GPs collect children from bus again no social distancing in amongst all ages. No matter how many rules and recommendations issued people will ignore to suit their own needs. I do my bit: social distance, wear a mask, use hand sanitiser, wash hands and don't go into other households. I have met with 3 then 1 person in their gardens. If I had to I would look after GC but then I would restrict all other contact by way of an effort to not only protect myself but also others.

I would love to have the chance just to see our little grandson in person, but he lives in New York. We haven’t seen him in the flesh since he as 3weeks old and he’s 15 months now. Fortunately we can Skype and we get lots of photos and videos, but it isn’t the same as a cuddle.
Our daughter and son-in-law have both been working from home with a baby and two little dogs who need regular walks and they seem to have coped by taking it in turns to entertain the baby and all going out with the dogs to get some exercise and have a break.
Until recently they lived in a one bedroom flat, so one of them had to sit in the bathroom with the door shut to entertain the baby when the other one was doing a conference call as the bedroom didn’t have a door to keep the noise in. Recently they have bought a bigger flat, so it’s much easier for them to work, especially as they have an outside deck as well.
Daycare started up again last week, so the baby is back there and loving it so it is much easier for them to work at home. I admire them for their positive attitude and ability to cope.

Thank goodness. My pregnant daughter cannot afford to work without grannycare. I, one of her granny carers, can barely manage to exist without grandaughter care. We are 99% only seeing each other..no pubs or crowded places so let us make our own decisions as to our own risks. It is going to be a very long winter anyway.

Absolutely spot on icanhandthemback......

Buttonjugs If you are saying that children shouldn’t be back at school because they are spreading the virus, what would You do now if you were in charge?
Keep them off or send them in?
I wish things were working better but little as I like BJ there is no guarantee that Jeremy or even Keir would have done any better although a man with a neat haircut looks more plausible as a leader. When I listen to and watch the people who are determined to do as they like or as they interpret the rules for their own convenience whether it’s huddling outside the school gates or attending raves, it seems the blame for the spread is definitely shared.

Quite frankly I am a Nanna on my own and not up to looking after school age grandchildren day after day Covid or no Covid. I also have an underlying health condition though not shielding but don't fancy taking my chances with Covid.
Seems to me that we are the next generation to be cleansed after those in care homes. Thanks Matt...

tearose369

Quite frankly I am a Nanna on my own and not up to looking after school age grandchildren day after day Covid or no Covid. I also have an underlying health condition though not shielding but don't fancy taking my chances with Covid.
Seems to me that we are the next generation to be cleansed after those in care homes. Thanks Matt...

You aren't being told you HAVE to care for the children, you are being given the choice to make up your mind, taking your own circumstances into account. I should think that after a good few years of being a mature adult, most of us should be able to do that. Most adult children with children can also evaluate what their parents can do too so they should be able to determine if it is fair to ask. For those of you who don't feel able to say no, it is not up to the Government to dictate to your children what you can and can't do, it is up to you to safeguard yourself.
I hate saying no to my grandchildren but can rationalise it by saying that if I look after the ones whose parents would like me too, if anything happens to me, all my grandchildren will lose me for eternity.

Whilst I understand and support the restrictions, I feel sorry for the bride who has to explain to the fifteen relatives and friends, who had already received their wedding invitations, why Cousin Maude can still go but not Auntie Bertha!