The President's Club Annual Gala - "Men Behaving Badly"

Although I agree there is some hysteria surrounding the "Me Too" band waggon campaign in seeking to demonise all men. I gather not all men at this function were behaving badly. Some said they felt uncomfortable.

I heard a lot about this on the radio yesterday, more than was shown on the BBC news. I agree that groping and exposing oneself is appalling but I did hear other points of view.

One young sounding woman said that a man had held her hand and another put his hand on her waist. She said that much worse happened when she went clubbing. I can imagine a situation where an older man might take the hand of a young girl in a kindly way and DH often puts his hand on the back of the waist of a woman when he is helping her to go first.

All the girls were given a briefing prior to the start of the event. They were told that if any man got 'handy' they were to tell him to stop and go straight to the person giving the briefing and tell them. It is clear that the organisers warned the girls that some men might try it on but that they should not tolerate it. Why did they not report it at the time as they had been told to do so?

No, I don't condone such behaviour but I do think that it has become fashionable to complain about almost anything a man does when with a woman. I also think that many would agree with me but won't speak out because they don't want to be accused of being misogynistic.

On the one hand we have strong women who can do everything men do and get on well in the world and on the other hand we have women who can't cope with a man making a pass at her.

When will we see men speaking out about the overt way women behave towards them in the workplace? I don't think it will be anytime soon.

Lots of uncomfortable people, and nobody spoke out. It really seems we've barely moved on from the bad old days..

Well said .Nonnie

Good grief; can't believe some of the comments on here. I suppose that, if one of them had been raped it would have been 'their fault' .

As Anniebach has already pointed out this event has been held for over 30 years! Its not something new.

I really don't hold with this claim of "poor innocent students trying to raise some money" . When my DD went to university she took a job in McDonalds. She did have to abide by the strict dress code, but it certainly wasn't high shoes, skimpy underwear and short skirts. These girls need to be taught to take responsibility for their own decisions. They were not press ganged into doing it.

Okay so some of the men went too far.... what would you expect at an all male affair like this? Especially given the type of people invited. Not a lot different from a large stag party visiting a strip club/pole dancing club etc.

Nonsense Tegan,

I think on the whole, that the young women were aware of what might go on, doesn’t excuse sleazy behavior of course.
Charity do’s of this kind, men only, are outdated ( you would think!)

Once we have gone past the shock and horror statements, what actually happened? We have anecdotal stories about a man exposing himself which may or may not be true, remember this is a journalist talking. I would be more inclined to accept it if the person it happened to said so. If it happened it is completely unacceptable and the girl concerned should have done as she was told at the briefing and reported him.

Apart from that it seems to be flirting.

As for Jess Philips, she said it was demeaning for women to be serving drinks to men. How does she feel when served by a man in a restaurant, is he demeaned? No one coerced them into serving wine!

That's silly Tegan of course that wouldn't be the case. my point is simple really. Why volunteer for such an event in the first place? get a part time job in McDonalds, Costa or the local chippy. Not glamorous enough maybe?

Most men only events in this context are sleazy events. If I applied for a job as a waitress and was told to wear sexy shoes, a short black dress and black underwear to an all-male event, I might just smell a rat - and tell them to stuff it. The chances of groping and inappropriate suggestions were enormous. Until men change their attitudes then those chances will remain high.

The existence of such an event, to which MPs are invited is in itself ridiculous and I am glad they have finished with it. Let us hope that others will now think twice before putting on such an event.

The endless litany of sexually inappropriate behaviour on the news is becoming tedious, but hopefully the message is getting out there - women have decided they will no longer be treated in this way, so get your act together you chaps.

Whilst not condoning this sort of event and behaviour it does seem this has become a focus for the current " me too" band wagon.
There are two sides to this story.

I agree Luckygirl, but this was covered by a newspaper journalist not one of the females who worked there that evening , so not really a case of women deciding . She even claimed one girl was touched on the hand. Will any man selling anything now be fearful of touch a woman's hand for fear of being accused of sexual abuse

I agree Annie and when she was asked if it happened to her too she said it did but didn't say what. Just because it was the FT doesn't mean it was not sensationalised. A sense of proportion would appear to be missing.

A sense of proportion certaintly missing.

Suppose Mandy Rice Davies who was living with Rachman when she 18, was a naive young girl , the victim of men

I know the sisterhood won't like it but these girls knew they had to wear skimpy clothes, short skirts, matching knickers. Many of the waitresses were 'actresses' or models. They worked for an agency which recruited good looking girls. You can bet your bottom dollar that a dumpy 5' 1" actress wouldn't have got this gig.

Now that does not excuse men groping them, not at all, but I do think women have to stop and ask themselves if they want to be sex objects. This sort of life isn't for every woman. These girls want to be admired.

Look online. You'll find pictures galore of women plastered in make-up, pouting and showing cleavage. OK, so they should be allowed to do that, to be admired, attractive to men, safe in the knowledge that they will not be touched in any way shape of form.

We have sort of got dog and bone behaviour going on. Humans have a sex drive. A sexy woman is going to be admired and have men come on to her, because that's the way procreation works - by attraction.

Did any of those women become offended when touched and make a scene - turn around and slap the offender? I bet not. After the event a female journalist says these women were groped. I'd have given the story much more credence if the agency who supplied the attractive women and OK'd them getting dressed in skimpy clothes made a complaint.

They didn't though, did they?

I am not condoning the behaviour of the men in question, no way, but this story is a two way street thing and we do need to question women who work in the glamour industry and the need for them to be adornment to events. It's about self respect as much as anything.

But the thing is this is not the 1970s, why have a men only fund raising event at all? One of my neighbours is a young women who works in finance at quite a high level, all the men in her office were invited to this event, she wasn’t. She has now raised this issue at board level . It’s not the same as a group of male or female friends going down to the pub together, this is organised event where the tickets were something like £1,500, so why not have a mixed event? The only reason i can think of its so that men can get drunk and ogle the young waitresses. I can’t think of any other reason. I can’t believe people on here are blaming the girls for men sexually assaulting them.

Day6 not even 'waitresses', they were recruited as 'hostesses'. I wonder what happened to the actual waitresses or whether they were waiters and it any of them were groped!

Personally I don't have a problem with men only events the same as I don't have a problem with women only things.

Next things we will have men joining the WI

Why would a woman complain she had not been invited to an all male club

I've been to a men only event, as it was 'an evening of boxing' and my then partner was a boxer, and I went along with him.
I was in my thirties, no blushing violet, and with someone who could box, but it was a very unnerving evening.
Maybe it was just that particular event, but there was a atmosphere of barely contained violence, and the air that anything could have happened. It made me really uncomfortable.

My partner was boxing in the show, by the way, not attending as part of the audience.

Why would a woman complain she had not been invited to an all male club

Why indeed Anniebach ?

www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/alcohol/guardian-readers-disgusted-by-their-own-men-only-pub-night-20180125143146

Pleased to hear that the children’s minister left early because he felt uncomfortable. He also assured us that he saw nothing untoward which would have made him uncomfortable