Have you done your Swedish death clean yet?

I have downsized twice in 6 years, each time to a much smaller property. Charities have done well from these moves. I try to have a clear out every couple of months, especially sentimental items. Books, with rare exceptions go to Charity shop or passed on to friends once read. Not much room for hoarding in my home & little storage

My DD has made it clear that she will sell my collections books & ornaments. She will probably sell my furniture as well if she can or give to charity.

My DD doesn't believe in throwing much away if it has a value.

My DM is 88 & she has parted with some bits & pieces but has 3 double wardrobes full of clothes, Charity Shops will do well.

When DH died I cleared his clothes out just after the Funeral, I kept a few treasured possessions & our wedding photo is on display.

No, but it is at the back of my mind. But you never know when you might need that little gift from that really expensive box of Christmas crackers that no one bothered to take home.....

It’s a great idea! Having sorted out 4 adults possessions after their death, it’s a lot to deal with. My MIL was a terrible hoarder but my mum, thankfully, wasn’t. She always had just enough. Couldn’t bear more than she needed! My husband has got several boxes of his dads to sort out still and he died three years ago.

If any of you have had to go through the heart wrenching process of doing the final clear out of the house that your parents lived in for the last 60+ years of their lives, then you will know the pain of opening wardrobes, drawers, medicine cabinets and looking at "stuff" - no use to anyone yet it makes you feel so intensely sad to have to pitch it! After doing "due diligence" in my parents home after they died, I vowed I would never let the build up of life long possessions cause my children the heartbreak I felt when they have to do take on this task. So we downsized and threw out so much of our unwanted/not needed possession three years ago - and every year take a very critical look at what we have and turn out more stuff. I look at it as a way to "pay it forward" to my kids for when it's their turn - and I know they feel relieved we aren't leaving this awful task to them !

pauline42 the things that upset me most when clearing my parent's home were their spectacles. We found a charity in the end who sent them to Africa. Our 'stuff' can often be used elsewhere

We declutter quite a lot over the year. Not ones for hanging onto much. Just what we like and need.

I can see what you mean but to get rid of too much stuff and live minimally feels so miserable. I like to have books, music, pictures and fabric.
However I can see the other side. Mentioning no names or places - a friend who was very creative had an enormous amount of items which were in every conceivable place, in a bag or cupboard, on top of cupboards, bags or boxes behind yet more boxes/bags. Her DH had no interest in these so a gang of friends got together to remove them. It took months as there was so much stuff. It was a salutary lesson for we hoarders.

I wouldn't expect anyone to get rid of their things unless they wanted to.
If someone wants to make life easier for those who are left, that's great. But if their belongings make them happy, they should keep them.

I have had to clear belongings of dead relatives and never resented that they didn't make the task easier for me.

Straight from the horses mouth this is, have lived in Sweden for fifty years next year, and havent heard of this but Swedes dont need to do this, they move about so much they de - clutter every time they move, and are so obsessed by keeping things tidy, they dont actually collect a lot of things. My lot are welcome to clear out when I pop off, I want to enjoy everything I have around me, hopefully for a few years, to hell with döstädning!

Isn’t going through possessions of loved ones after they’ve gone part of the grieving process. Finding those old mementoes that meant something once to someone or a favourite book. How cold and clinical most of you posters are. After my mother’s funeral I and my 3 siblings put all Mums smaller possessions into piles. Things that weren’t in her will, silver, glasses,pictures,nicnacks etc. We drew lots and took turns to choose from each category. We all had a choice of things that we would like and it prompted chats of memories and in a way was a bonding process for us. Obviously there were things that went to the charity shop. My brother arranged to take the lovely old wardrobe which he then repurposed into boxes and gifts for various family members. Somehow much gentler and kinder. We would have hated Mum to have disposed of everything. By the way my mother was Swedish.

My mother refused to get rid of anything before she died and actually joked about us having to do it. I am disabled but was left to clear her 4 bedroom house Garage and attic. My partner was a bit of a hoarder and he had died 2 years before and I still don’t know what to do with half his stuff that the charity shops won’t take but are too painful to throw on a skip if no one wants them like his paintings. I am slowly decluttering
so my son does not have to go through what I did. Also making sure my bank details etc are all listed and when I have enough spare cash I’ll pay for my own funeral. It frees us all anyway because too much stuff can make you feel burdened

I declutter and declutter and declutter. It all grows back in the night when I am asleep.

Actually, I think life rather helps you sort through things and clutter on various occasions.

Clearing my parents' home after my father died was a wake-up call and DH and I went through our attic afterwards and got rid of a lot of stuff we realised did not mean anything to us any more. When we moved five years ago, even more went out.

I've just gone through some family photos, sending a good deal to my cousins as the people in the photos were our mutual grandparents, great-aunts and uncles and their mother and my father etc. Intend to go through photos from the other side of my family sometime soon.

Apart from that we have decided from now on to try not to keep things on the odd chance that they will come in useful.

Anything we are fond of stays, unless we really can see that there is no point in keeping it.

My aunt had gone through all her things, and disposed of what she didn't want us to see of private letters and left the rest tidily marked with the name of the person she wanted to have it or thought might be interested. It did make clearing her flat easier, I must admit, but my sister and I felt a little saddened at the fact that a lot of things we would have liked to see again were no longer there.

Oh dear! If I'd started at 50 my house wouldn't be in the chaos it is now. I often feel too tired physically and/or mentally to sort anything. On a good day I go out which doesn't help. A bad day is worse I huddle and distract myself with online stuff ...
I'd better go now.

What should I do with old love letters? I don't want anyone else to read them but how can I part with them.

Blueskies......simple - keep the ones from the man you eventually married - rip up the rest! Tie a ribbon round the saved ones and tuck them away with your Will or precious possessions and addressed to your kids to read once you and your husband have died.

Every one should consider Advance Care Planning is it important to discuss with our families what we would like if we become unwell. I often suggest to my patients that they 'prepare for the worst but hope for the best'.

When my mother died it took me many months to go through all her things. She used to cut out articles about gardening from the newspaper and there were loads of boxes of them. They went straight into the recycling.

She also kept all my school reports. I hated school and was bullied. I shredded these as they felt too personal to put in the recycling. I wish she'd got rid of these so I didn't have to!

I try to go through my stuff from time to time, so whoever inherits my cr*p doesn't have to spend as long doing it.

I do know someone who hired a professional 'declutterer' to sort through their uncle's house after he died. She was VERY expensive apparently!

Hi all of you ..... here's the thing..... read an excellent book called... The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying.I 'borrowed' it from my daughters' house .....couldn't understand the title as she is THE most untidy person I know! So felt compelled to see if she had actually broken the spine of the book by opening it. She had! Well I was amazed! Anyhow... I'm reading it now...started in the bus home from her place which involves long walk and two buses, so plenty of time. I was so engrossed I missed my stop. This book is an eye -opener. Once read and advice followed all your kids will have no trouble with your pristine / de-cluttered home when you all ' pop-your-clogs'. I'm into the 'categorising ' stage and it is life -changing!!

Oh and NameChange2016
You miss the whole point of de-cluttering if you hire in a professional!

cayugal123 de-cluttering ISNT to save your loved ones the bother of doing it after your demise......its for you...now !! It is THE most freeing experience. You will only have to do it once ... honestly! Read the book by Marie Kondo.

I don't think our children would want us to get rid of items that we saved up for just on the off chance that we popped off next week? What if we get rid of all our things at 50 then live until our 90s? DH and I are both collectors and our things have a certain value. I'm not going to throw them away or donate them. DS knows to look online to see what they are selling for at the time of our deaths so he knows how much he can expect to get for each particular item. He can keep what he wants and get cash for the rest.

From the title, I thought it was some kind of drastic colon cleanse! Jane43

I had a big clear-out last month, but at 63 I wasn't really thinking in terms of impending death!

minimo life is short enough already, I certainly don't want to do this. Life is for living, not waiting to die.