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News & politics

Same sex marriages now legal

(184 Posts)
whenim64 Sat 29-Mar-14 10:22:51

It was good to see the happy couples getting married around the country today, and interesting to see that the ones on the news have been together for a long time. One couple I saw being interviewed yesterday said they had wanted a simple, quiet wedding but by booking it at a minute past midnight they had brought on themselves a mad dash from the media to talk about their view of the change in the law. Still, great to see progress smile

Grannyknot Sun 30-Mar-14 10:48:19

Oops, mcem you did explain that. I got carried away with the excitement of the thought of 2 people in love making a commitment.

I can just imagine the x 2! My daughter's fiance is a snappy dresser, so in a way we have that too grin

mcem Sun 30-Mar-14 10:26:25

I admit I'm confused about the details. If I do get clarification, I'll pass on any useful info.
My niece was married with full nuptial mass. Her brother was married in a hotel by a Church of Scotland minister. Other 2 nephews were married in hotels by registrars. Looking at the registrar's website the suggested vows seem almost identical to the vows made by my nephews apart from the words Marriage and Civil Partnership.

Aka Sun 30-Mar-14 10:15:36

Incidentally I read that those already in Civil Partnerships are not able to get married.

Aka Sun 30-Mar-14 10:14:25

I think it's just being light-hearted mcem and not meant to give offence. I'll pass on good wishes too.

mcem Sun 30-Mar-14 10:06:03

Civil marriage is not an option in Scotland yet, as I said, but I'm not clear of the significant differences between the 2 institutions. This week, my girls will be organising the paperwork with the registrar and I do hope that after that appointment they may be able to explain it more clearly to me.
On a less serious note to Grannyknot - imagine the fuss of dress and everything else x 2!

whenim64 Sun 30-Mar-14 09:57:30

Well said, Grannyknot. smile

mcem Sun 30-Mar-14 09:56:10

Sorry Aka, can't agree that it's ok to trivialise such a significant event in anyone's life by using such terms. Live and let live = tolerant. Whatever floats their boat = minor issue and not worthy of serious discussion. I admit however that my opinion may be coloured by the fact that some posters do tend to dismiss issues which are taken more seriously by others -often with a trite, throwaway one-liner!
On the other hand I'm happy to pass on the warm wishes!

Grannyknot Sun 30-Mar-14 09:49:22

mcem congratulations flowers I also have a daughter getting married this year smile.

I think it's great that anyone who wants to, can get married.

I came to the conclusion a long time ago that sexuality is a continuum, with heterosexuality sort of in the middle and we are all somewhere on that line. Maybe that's my way of making sense of it.

Ariadne I also tried to work out why you mention shaving! grin

feetlebaum Sun 30-Mar-14 09:45:04

The fact that two people want to mark their loving relationship, and incidentally provide the same kind of inheritance rules as obtain to hetero couples, is their business and theirs alone.

Why does anyone have an opinion on this? It's simple: if you don't like the idea of same sex marriage, then don't marry someone of the same sex.

There - problem solved.

Marriage was always primarily a matter of politics or business - often it still is.

Brendawymms Sun 30-Mar-14 09:44:32

it is irrelevant to me what people I know do in their private lives. Being a nurse I have worked with many people in committed same sex relationships and find them universally kind and genuine friends. However, and without logic, I find I have an instinctive dislike of the concept of marriage between same sex couples. For some reason I do not have the same feelings for civil partnerships and wish there was a similar institution for heterosexual couples. A bit of inequality there. I have put considerable thought into my feelings as respect for all is a mantra for me but I have, as yet, not been able to reconcile my dissonance on this.

Aka Sun 30-Mar-14 09:35:30

Sorry, that was my fat fingers again, meant to say 'boat'.

Aka Sun 30-Mar-14 09:34:26

mcem I'm sure that the remark 'whatever floats their vote' was not meant dismissively, but rather in the spirit of 'live and let live', at least that's how I took it.

PRINTMISS Sun 30-Mar-14 09:04:42

I am with those who believe that 'marriage' is between a man and a women. I have always felt that being gay sometimes leads to a lonely life, so I am happy that it is no longer a hidden fact that two people of the same sex can happily (and legally) co-habit, but I do think marriage is stretching the point.

mcem Sun 30-Mar-14 09:04:37

Well I'm a mum who is looking forward to being part of my daughter's civil partnership celebation in the summer. My girls opted for civil partnership a few months back and we've been planning accordingly. Marriage is not yet an option in Scotland but the girls are happy with their plans. If, given the choice of civil or church ceremony, they'd opted for church, I'd have objected as I would for any other couple with no church connection.
I can't agree with Jings that it is sad but I can see she's put some thought into it and has reached a considered opinion. Others have expressed reservations too and I'm not out to convert anyone. What I do find hard to take is the heartless dismissal of the future happiness and commitment of my daughter and the whole gay community with flippant remarks like 'whatever floats their boat'. Can't you see how hurtful and patronising such an attitude is?

NanKate Sun 30-Mar-14 07:55:28

I'm with you Jings, I believe a marriage is between a man and a woman.

However I wish all the couples a happy married life, even if it is not for me.

Ariadne Sun 30-Mar-14 07:28:15

ana smile Hadn't noticed!

Faye Sun 30-Mar-14 02:45:48

You could change your thinking lefthanded to a "marriage" is a legal union between two people who love each other.

lefthanded Sun 30-Mar-14 02:09:32

I'm just confused. I thought the whole idea of civil partnerships was to give same-sex couples equal legal status with married couples - something that was long overdue. The only thing that bothers me about same-sex marriages is that the terminology irritates the pedant in me. I cannot escape the feeling that a "marriage" is a legal union of a man and a woman.

Ana Sat 29-Mar-14 20:11:53

I was wondering for ages what 'heteroshave' was, Ariadne, and how it could be legal! confused

Silverfish Sat 29-Mar-14 20:08:47

We have brought homosexuality into the 21st century. We are very diverse creatures and anyone not liking it does not have to mix with someone in a same sex marriage. Politeness doesn't cost anything so just smile and walk on. Maybe it will stop the homophobia that is so common today. Good luck to anyone marrying today. (and any day)

Culag Sat 29-Mar-14 20:08:18

I think it's great too. Just two people committing themselves to each other.

Tegan Sat 29-Mar-14 19:45:56

I always worried that my children would be gay; not because of them actually being gay but because they would feel different and unhappy in some way. So, along with all the gay people that can now be totally open about their relationships and also legalise them, I reckon there are a lot of mums that are happy for them too.

janerowena Sat 29-Mar-14 19:39:30

I think it's great. I suppose I have been more used to people around me being brave enough to 'come out', being in my 50s, so am more aware how many people around me are gay. And how normal they are, with the same desire for a long-lasting and happy relationship.

TOOBIGFORTHEIRBOOTS Sat 29-Mar-14 19:33:52

Jingle has it in a nutshell..

ginny Sat 29-Mar-14 19:33:18

jings Why do you say it is a sad fact ? Surely a loving relationship between two people cannot be sad. I heard some one say the other day " isn't it a shame in a world where so many men (women) hate each other, that there are those that cannot feel happy for two men (women) to love each other "