Help calm me. House buying and selling stress

Two flats here (total of 25), both commenced their sale journey at the beginning of November and, both are due for Completion on 24th February. These sales are linked with regards to purchasers - which is why same day. I suppose three months is not too bad. Solicitor for them is just opposite to flats, so have been able to pop into them with any paperwork they requested.

As Secretary of the Management Company I deal with the Solicitors for all sellers here. I really do feel that solicitors seem to be adding more and more (often totally useless), questions. Even a standard form that is used, appears to have added several more questions recently.

A third flat has started the process this week. This is a probate sale. I keep a large file of paperwork so that I can, very quickly send replies to Solicitors endless questions. I always try to get replies back to them as quickly as possible.
If it is a local Solicitors where I can just drop off paperwork it is within 24 hours.

The latest purchasers have also contacted me directly with sensible questions (which do not occur in the Solicitors endless ones), asking about how good internet connections are here, etc.

The sellers of this latest one, told me yesterday they thought it should all go through with a few weeks, and I did rather gently disillusion them - told them to hope for three months!!! They also asked me when they should get all the existing furniture in there cleared out and I did advice them to wait until further down the legal process. Whereas, we know that the purchasers really do want to move into it - nothing is certain, and IF (hopefully not - but IF), the flat did have to return to the market then it will look better with some furniture in it. Must say it sold, at a very good price less than 14 days of going on the market.

I do not envy anyone in this process of selling/buying - but for me, those dark days between 2015 and end of 2019 when I was going through it are well behind me and I am so pleased I stuck with it. I am very certain that I had added several years to my life in living here. AND.....Probably more important - Happy years.

Hope everyone survives the storms yesterday and tomorrow. No real problems down here last night - tomorrow my SiL is collecting me to take me to local hospital for some annual tests. Then once back home in the afternoon, I will be packing ready for a few days in London (going by car with daughter), for a family celebration.

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I put my bins out early today, much calmer right now, they will go straight back inside my garage when emptied. I also quickly squashed stuff close together in my freezer, leaving a whole empty drawer, filled boxes with water and that drawer is now full. Quick freeze on. Physics, ie water will retain cold far longer than empty space, prepping in case of a prolonged power cut. Freezer is now crammed and safe for a long time

Charging my makita batteries and have accessed my makita radio and lamps. I know where my candles and matches are and have access to cold foods in my drawer. Phone will be kept on full charge. No idea where my charger is right now. I just need to climb up and get my big vac flask down. All just in case of course. I would rather prep than not. Oh yes, I have some heavy round hanging bird feeders, would be like cannon balls. I have removed them for a while

I have always had a consuming interest in weather charts. There is a 3% channce that eunice will veer into the channel but hardly likely. It is building into a monster, the likes of which some have never seen

There will be 000s of trees down, particulaly shallow rooted pine as the soil is wet and soft and also dead and dying ash trees.

I am absolutely dreading friday, storm eunice is going to be terrible, worst storm for a very long time

Thank you, everyone, for your helpful comments and insight. I suppose we are extra anxious because, having paid off our mortgage 20 years ago, we sold our house in the Midlands and moved to a rental whilst we looked for another home in Norfolk. In the end it took us 2 years to find somewhere we liked and, in the interim, prices had gone up so much that we had to take out another mortgage. No possibility of doing that now. We have absolutely no spare money to spend on renovating a place and we're aware just how much it costs to move house, so I suppose the bottom line is that we simply can't afford to move to a more expensive area and then be miserable. Maybe the AirBnB suggestion put forward by Shandy57 is the best option. One thing's certain though, decluttering is the least of my stresses - I'm an older version of Stacey Solomon!

Grandmagrewit once you put your house on the market don't get your hopes you will sell quick and find a new property just as quickly. I am an old hand from previous parts of this thread. This was my timeline. House on the market March 2018 accepted offer June . Found my bungalow July. Buyer pulled out day of exchange in September. Accepted offer November. March 2019 4 days before exchange buyer pulled out . Accepted offer week later finally moved August 2019. Luckily everytime I had a buyer pull out the executors of the will keep the bungalow for me. I moved over 100 miles to the north west .

My brother and sister in law put their house on the market August last year sold their house and moved out in 14 weeks. Staying with her dad since as the bungalow they wanted fell through. Still looking for a bungalow they like.

Start decluttering now as it takes longer than you think . Estate agents over price houses . I told my estate what to put mine on for as their estimate was ridiculous. You need to develop a thick skin as people viewing your house will say things about your home you may not like.

Because I was on my own had a policy only 2 adults no teenagers. And shoes had to be left in the porch.
No one objected.

Remember your house sale and purchase is not safe until exchange .

You are in for a very stressful time. But once you move into your new home and get it as you want it it's worth all the sleepless nights and tears. Finally got my bungalow all done as I wanted before Christmas.

The first couple of years in your new home will be all pay out as you get it as you want.

In my old house I existed . Since moving I live my life to the full .

Good luck with your journey.

Just what Greta8 says - be prepared for house to sell quickly - ours took a week !

Welcome @Grandmagrewit - so many of us have wrestled with what you're attempting to do. It's daunting at the start, but it takes on a momentum of its own once you get your own house on the market.

Our story - our daughter asked us to consider moving nearer to her - a move from Somerset to Gloucestershire. We took our time but once our daughter was expecting our grandchild we got our act together and put things in motion.

It wasn't just about moving nearer, we had a very old period property with a large garden which eventually would become too much for us. The house required pretty constant maintenance too. We put it on the market three years ago this month, thinking it would be difficult to sell. It sold within a fortnight to a lovely couple relocating from the Home Counties. Then the stressful hunt was on for our next properties. We did the usual lists of 'must haves' and 'desirable' and drove round a few different areas within a 15 mile radius of our daughter and son-in-law (we didn't want to be on their doorstep). We found a modern four bed in a lovely village with plenty of amenities and a bus service into the nearest city 15 miles away. Perfect house with a small but private garden (gardening and growing plants from seed is my hobby). It was a bit stressful at times (mainly the legal paperwork) but it's been a great adventure too. I'm late 60's now and we've settled really well. We've lovely neighbours, my husband volunteers at the Cathedral and we look after our beautiful grandson a couple of days a week. No-one knows what the future holds, but life is good at the moment and I wouldn't have missed these times for the world. So glad not to be stuck back in Somerset missing out. Of course he will be at school in a few years and things will change, but we both have many interests to keep us going. We're gradually doing stuff to make the house ours - that takes time too.

So, yes stressful - but exciting and weirdly I think a move keeps you feeling young. I think you just make your own decisions and not worry too much about what other people say. Life is short!

Hello all and welcome Grandmagrewit - I am still buying and selling and will update you in a mo! Sounds like we are all battening down the hatches - we’ve moved our empty - ready for move - pots into the garage and I’ve made sure everything else is well watered so heavy and tucked in. What else to do? Considering sleeping downstairs as we’re in a barn conversion that is very windy up on a west facing hill with Velux windows! Very noisy.
So Grandmagrewit we had exactly the same dilemma - 6 hour round trip from Northumberland to Sheffield area and after 4 years prevarication (and delays due to covid) we are hopefully moving within 30 mins of both our daughters and grandchildren in about 4 weeks time ??. Like you it’s to an eye wateringly expensive area (Peak District) compared to here so moving to a shoe box - but a very pretty one !
The questions we were asked - do you like the area ? A: it’s ok. Do you know they are staying put? A : I don’t have a crystal ball! Will you miss your life and friends A : of course ! “Your grandchildren will grow up and leave - what then? “
The thing is none of us can predict the future . It’s what you want to do NOW that counts ! We”ll make new friends , new hobbies, new home. The g/kids won’t grow up for 15 years and I’ll be 80 by then, if everyone moves away we”ll move too or head for the sea ... or run away to sea ?. Whatever happens it’s a new adventure .
Do what your heart says as life is too short . As Franbern says - Put your house up for sale and get a buyer who is in a good position ( renting preferably) then choose the first house that you like and make a sensible offer, when you get to your third house and are fed up with travelling to look at houses put in a silly offer and get it ! Hopefully you will get the first as princes are slowing I do think but this what we did! Then be prepared to be very patient and to deal with a lot and wait. Our offer went in on 4th September - moving probably on 15th March. No serious issues just getting surveys took a long time, renegotiating price, solicitors not doing what they should in a timely manner, our vendor dying and probate etc, delays in clearing the property and our very patient buyers (a vicar in rented accommodation ?) needing to get a new mortgage offer. So even if you start now it could take a year. We decided not to do the rental thing but with hindsight it might have worked better - indeed we were put off by the cost of renting . However travelling to see properties was gruelling and meant we probably missed out on some that went very quickly . It also takes out the real stress of buying and selling at the same time so I would seriously consider it as it also puts you in such a good position to buy so you may save a bit on that . But you need to be really serious about selling and budgeting for renting and moving plus legal fees - always much more than you think ! Get rid of as much as you possibly can ( and you have to harden your heart here and start early as many others will say) . It won’t get any easier so if you really do want to be nearer to family then go for it now ! Just be methodical about the planning .
OR - stay put and enjoy where you are , accept the journey and book lengthy holiday cottage stays , buy a caravan - just seriously look at the alternatives that you could afford if you weren’t moving ! I’m sure you have already. It is truly daunting and we have changed our minds very many times and worried through the night about our decision - we are both incredibly nervous about the none but looking forward to having weekly tea parties , swimming , walks, sleepovers etc etc with the grandkids and I’m really longing to be nearer my two daughters. So fingers crossed we will survive the coming storms (on every level!) and I”ll let you know how we get on ! Good luck everyone and sorry for the endless post !

It has long been the policy for EA's not to let people view properties unless their own one is Under Offer. Was the rule when I was doing this three years back. Does help to prevent time=wasters.

So, Grandmagrewit - if you wish to make this move then you need to get your own current home on the market and see what offers you actually get. You may be pleasantly surprised, but nothing is guaranteed and EA's telling you how easy it will be to sell your house, is jsut toget you tosign up with them. Do remember nothing is finalised until Contracts are Exchanged. And, although you may hate to disappoint a potential purchaser further down the line, that is the way the system works in this country.

So get it under offer and then spend your time this coming Spring to really see what you can purchase, and be prepared to compromise. Work out the real importances, and discard the 'Would Like' bits. Sussex is an expensive County and their prices will probably rise proportionately faster than in Norfolk so the longer you leave it the more impossible it may become.

It is the quiet time just now, the house market starts to pick up around end of march to april, then it goes quiet again for the summer holidays. Yes you need to have a firm purchaser for your house first, this makes buying/selling extra stressful. Obviously the best way is rented while weighing up an area and to take some pressure off but renteds are difficult nowadays

You could spend time prepping your house for sale and by sorting/downsizing/decluttering so that your house looks the best it could be. Most buyers appear very soon after going on the market

It costs a lot of money to move, £20000 is a fair figure and about the same again to settle in. Good luck, it is terribly hard to make that decision and welcome to the thread

Afternoon all, very wet now here, glad I went to the beach earlier. Just stabbed myself with the stanley knife opening the plastic on the boxes so having a break!

Welcome Grandmagrewit. It is a seller's market at the moment and many buyers on MSE are in despair as their vendors are unable to find anywhere to move to and are withdrawing. Buyers are losing their fees and survey costs as there isn't any contract until exchange.

From posts I've seen on Gransnet, several people have moved to be nearer their grandchildren, and then the family have then had to relocate with work. If you like your house and the area, can the house be future proofed? Could you book an Airbnb every quarter to see your grandchildren?

Is this thread still about house buying and selling? If so, is anyone else, like me, spending their days scrolling through "property alerts" for the area they want to move to but becoming increasingly depressed about what is available and the seemingly unstoppable rise in prices. To be nearer to family requires us to move from Norfolk to Sussex where we will need to use savings/pension funds as well as the proceeds from selling our current 3 bed home in order to afford even a very modest house in an unknown area. We are contacted weekly by local estate agents who claim our house would sell "within days" - most likely to folk who want to move out of London and Essex to rural Norfolk. But what then?? We can't afford to spend months in a rental property in Sussex (even if we could find one) while we look for a new home and prices just keep going up in the meantime. We've even considered selling anyway, putting our furniture in storage and living in a caravan over the summer. But would that be any cheaper? Much advice I've read says "move sooner rather than later" (we are in our late 60s) but estate agents in Sussex are telling us we must have a firm offer on our present house before we can view anything. Then it seems that buyers these days are expected to make an offer (often more than the asking price) for hundreds of thousands of pounds just on the strength of a 10 minute viewing of a property! I find this very scary. I've read posts on here from people who have moved to new homes in the past year and love their new life but this stress is really getting to me and I feel like abandoning the whole idea. The alternative though is continuing to cope with the awful 3 hour motorway journey to get to our grandchildren and seeing them rarely - our DS and DiL have nowhere for us to say in their house. Sorry this is a bit of a moan but I would be genuinely interested to hear from others with a similar dilemma.

orange here on friday, been running around squeezing stuff closer in the garage. Had to stow my two small garden sets, they are metal and quite light, could get ruined by the wind. Bin day tomorrow, not putting anything out tonight and will decide tomorrow morning, I could last until next time if needed. Neighbour has put all his out, going to be 5 days away, tbh seems that I am always the one moving bins back but am not going to pick up wind strewn rubbish this time, done that loads of times.

That’s a great site karmalady! Hope you all stay safe.

son in scotland says that everything in his garden is permanently battened down, says is becoming very windy

interesting uk wind site

www.xcweather.co.uk/

Morning karmalady, wind has started already here too, dog was barking at it when I let him out. Checked Loch Lomond and it's just a muddy pit now, I am a twit.

I hope everyone stays safe. My daughter's new filming schedule is 12 noon until 12 midnight so she will be out in it in her tiny Corsa on the pitch dark country roads

Glad today is your last painting day, I thought it was finishing on 19th? Fast work. Enjoy rearranging everything. I have over 100 pictures and was going to put them up everywhere before the floors are done - then thought of them lifting the joists out, might get knocked off. I'll have to rewrap and store in the lounge instead. I was upset my marble picture on the floor by the toilet has been damaged, no idea how the builders did that.

Dog walk then making the 20 boxes, dog goes mad at the sound of the tape, wish me luck!

Michael Portillo railway programmes are lovely, slow, gentle and calm

I see gusts of 50 are due here and the severn bridges are closed, even going to be wild down here and friday is yellow for wind because of the second storm. I must batten down here, starting with my whirly washing line. Gosh the wind is loud. I am supping a giant mug of tea in bed, nicer than the kitchen right now

Painter is on the last stretch downstairs today, two coats of dulux diamond on the wood, with a disappearing act in between. I will sit tight until friday and will begin to restore order, just pictures perhaps, I will keep everything away from the wood until saturday. I won`t take anything out from the garage until the wind and expected rain stops but I can restore the kitchen and hall by sunday

I am going to buy a small box of bojangles to celebrate, after the small bedroom is done. The bojangles with the small bottle of champagne that I bought for christmas. My son once bought me some train dvds, I`ll try and find them, they were nice to watch

I did karmalady but I got bored emptying it via the watering can and took a silly shortcut, and tipped it over to empty it when it was half full. Now have a Loch Lomond sized lake in the gravel, hopefully it will drain away eventually.

I hope the patio doors will be OK, I've moved absolutely everything that could fly up and bash them, I've even put a concrete roof tile on top of my metal watering can. A friend on Way Up had a new gardener and he was strimming and a stone hit her patio doors - luckily he was insured.

Right, back to Michael Portillo and Great Coastal Railways!

Did you manage to do the waterbutt? I am thinking now about your patio doors. Do they feel very secure? if not then see if you can find some masking tape and put a couple of crossed diagonal strips on each pane. Just in case.

Hey thanks karmalady, how nice of you. I've had another thinking day, just can't get going. So cold here I couldn't feel my hands walking the dog.

Our local counsellor has just issued a big post on fb about preparing for the storm including bolting down your loft hatch/moving beds away from under chimneys - it's going to be bad. I've really got the jitters. Flasks/candles/torches ready and I've charged my Juice powerbank fully, won't get caught with low battery on my mobile again. So nice of my friend to let me in at 8 am that Saturday!

I'm just going outside to drain and bring the waterbutt inside, it's just outside the patio doors. It's a tall skinny one and the original stand was four separate pieces - they were blown out twice and the butt had fallen down sideways, luckily still connected to the downpipe.

I bought a new solid base but it's actually too big for it and it wobbles about. There's only the downpipe wall connector attached to the wall, if I tie it to that it could pull the pipe off.

Have a good evening, off to do it right now!

shandy I must say that your organisation and mental stoicism, well they must have inspired many of us. What has happened to you has been more than a small hiccup and you have kept going through thick and thin. It really does put small problems into perspective. You deserve some at least you won`t have to find a vase for these.

Boxes have arrived so starting to empty the huge wall cupboard tomorrow, I'm going to number them and keep an inventory after the teddy coat disappearance! I am going to do one room at a time and be methodical, my normal approach is haphazard, I'm going to be disciplined for once.

My garage have cancelled my car appointment tomorrow and I'm quite glad, my route takes me past several country lanes lined with old trees.

oh crikey yes, all the dangerous stuff we dabbled with in those days, rolling mercury around with fingers, dissecting rats preserved in formaldehyde, with bare hands, sniffing ether to remember the smell. Sitting on an upstairs sash window cill and cleaning the outside for my mum. Whoops must go, need to prep for painter

How nice of you karmalady, thank you!

I feel a lot better now I've made my list of furniture. I'm still dithering over my daughter's desk - I don't like the style but it will do as a sewing machine table until I find something else. Luckily I've only bought two items since I moved in, the art deco sideboard and the tv unit, so I don't have very much - as you know the sofa was ruined. I was worried about dismantling the beds myself, and wasn't sure if I could lift the mattresses. And I would never be able to lift the big Ikea Hemnes 8 drawer chest the vendor gifted me. I'm going to send 'unbreakables' in boxes to storage - all my sewing stuff and books. I won't be sewing for some time yet, but hope to continue the proggy mat I'd started for my daughter.

I've ordered 20 double bunded boxes from kite packaging, and tape - and I'll be keeping them afterwards!

Good luck with your decorating, isn't it marvellous it doesn't smell nowadays. In the late 60's my Dad painted my windowsills inside my bedroom with creosote!

oh shandy, I wish I was nearer and could physically help you. All those decisions, by yourself, all that upheaval, by yourself. They say that what does not kill us makes us stronger, hang onto that