Help calm me, house buying and selling stress part 2

Morning everyone, very icy here today and joiner is coming to paint the windows hope he doesn't stick to the scaffolding! When I was dieting I had a sneaky lick of the ice cream spoon after I'd dished it out for everyone, tongue stuck fast, served me right!

Grammaretto, this was my husband's idea, as he loved his 'castle' and never wanted to leave here. Unfortunately he died before we had the chance of doing the main house up for rent, and just this small experience with the windows has shown me I can't stand having workmen tramping around, nice as they are. How lovely the kids enjoyed running around your house, my happiest days were when the children bought all their friends home for tea, then disappeared into the depths of the house and garden.

I looked at Fowey last night, it was my husband's favourite place and when we lived in London, where he said he'd like to retire. When he was relocated up to Northumberland, he loved it here as it is so peaceful, and the Fowey retirement dream receded. As a Londoner I still have a yearning for multicultural society and all the facilities it offers, but want the peace and quiet I have now. I don't think this combination exists, I'm so confused, but Fowey is too remote for me, even with Newquay airport only 30 miles away.

Take the point about house hunting is fun, when not necessary. For me, finding a flat was not the difficulty - it was the selling that stressed me so very badly.
However, each time I saw a flat that I might have been able to move into, I went into happy, fantasy mode and took down the dimensions of the main rooms, made my own floor plans, which showed rads. as well as windows, doors, etc. and happily (on paper), put in my furniture.
I have some lovely, modular units in my Living Room and I was quite determined these would move with me. Always had a tape measure when flat hunting, and looked for a suitable expanse of wall in the Living rooms for these. Much of the time I was doing this, I knew it was just 'fantasy land', but I enjoyed it, and it kept me occupied during some of the darker moments of selling.
Interestingly, as I am now getting the last things unpacked, I found this A4 pad and have looked at all those designs I did. The one for this flat is virtually as I have laid out the living room.
The main problem with moving (well, it was for me, was the selling), and I think it is the same for Mw. Once that side is clearly and definitely underway, then the rest is (comparatively) easy.
I did do the clearing out for nearly four years, and got more and more drastic as time went on. I had no bedroom furniture to bring as ALL of mine in the house I had fitted in. Just my bed and bedside cabinets came with me.
Living room, my lovely units, which includes a large display cabinet for my gymnastic figurines, etc. Just over a year ago I did purchase a new sofa and chair (electric recliners), but did so, taking into account that they would, hopefully, be going into a flat. Earlier this year changed out my large, heavy Tv for a modern one and, again, when I bought a unit for it to sit on, ensured it would fit in a flat happily. Looks great here.
Strangely enough I have more room in the Living room in this flat, than I did in the through lounge of my house. Better shape as well. So, four years ago I had given my large, expensive dining table to one of my daughters (looks much better and is used more in her dining room), and bought a cheap drop leaf table with chairs inside.
This has now gone to a local charity, who have just set up a new office and need furniture, and I have bought a gorgeous, round, easily extendable, dining table which makes having a meal with visitors so much easier. When I was visiting WsM last April, we saw this particular table in a local shop which has the type of furniture I like, and I fell in love with it. So please I was able to purchase it when I finally moved here.
Mw - be so good if you get some good news soon, do start on your lists and also looking around as to WHERE and WHAT.

Mosaicwarts I've been giving thought to your location dilemma, tell me to be quiet if I'm too bossy. You've had your turn at the London life, (as I did for decades), and yes you would miss the multicultural society and all the facilities BUT it's a young person's place and I was beginning to feel a bit stressed jumping on and off tube trains and running up escalators. I always seemed to be getting in people's way or got helplessly pulled along in rush hour crowds. You've also had your turn at remote living, I tried too that for a while but it really isn't practical as one gets older and needs to be close to various services like doctors, shops, transport etc. You mention Fowey, but how about Falmouth, that is bigger and has a lot going for it? Otherwise if you are worried about transport links try looking around Exeter which has daily flights to London and Europe, also trains to Paddington take just over 2 hours plus the M5 is on the doorstep. Best of all worlds here ... sea, countryside, shops, hospitals etc. Exmouth is good, Honiton and Dawlish not bad, and Budleigh are Sidmouth are just perfect. Sorry I'll stop now before I sound like a travel guide! Just a few suggestions!

Hello everyone, joiner came at 9.30 am and unfortunately -2 degress here, so couldn't paint after all. I'm now drinking the coffee flask I made him, two sugars, urgh!

Thank you so much for the list suggestions Franbern, my mind is mush still with my grief, I can't even do my Christmas prep list at the moment. I have written both headings in capitals in my book, so helpful, the first thing I must have is a focal point fire in the room. I know it is old fashioned to want this, but I found it very difficult to be 'centred' in the bungalow I viewed, with underfloor heating.

I'm a bit scared about all the costs, and will knuckle down and research these thoroughly. If only I'd known I'd have to wait so long for my state pension - as I took my Teacher's Pension early, it's peanuts, but on the positive side, it did help me get through the long probate wait.

Ellianne thank you very much for the place recommendations, my daughter has a friend living in Exeter and she actually recommended I look there.` I think I've already told you I was fascinated by the black swans as a child when we visited Dawlish.

I'm off to find the heat logs I used to get from Homebase to bolster the kiln dried wood I use - they are selling some white sawdust rubbish now and there's no heat at all.

Stay warm and well!

MW, a lot of the flats I viewed had a fireplace (usually electric) along one wall. This was - for me - a'No,No' Do not want any sort of fire in my living room and it was usually placed in the middle of the long wall I would have used for my units. Obviously, each of us requires different things, which is why it is so important to have your tick-lists ready and use them when viewing.
The West country (except for around Poole in Dorset - can be reasonably priced, as - indeed - is Kent and the South Coast near Hastings. All have good rail links with London and motorway links. Obviously the weather is better down south and there are lots of seaside towns for you to consider.
I agree with Ellianne regarding London, whereas you may have loved Twickenham when you lived there, does not mean it is suitable for you now.
I always loved being a Londoner (although living in a very leafy suburb surrounded by Epping Forest. I do not miss it at all, only ever really did things in my own home borough and neighbouring - detested going into Central London at any time as it was so noisy and so very crowded.
I am now a (proud) owner of an Echo - feel very 21st century!
My lovely SiL has also fitted my kitchen cupboard base door (used the one he took off the old integral fridge), to replace the space where the freezer was under the hobs, and now has shelves housing my pots and pans, etc.
He has also taken down the very old fashioned small strip light above the hobs, ready for me to replace with something a lot more modern, set up my Echo (as a life-long trekkie, it is called 'computer' here), and sorted out the hinges on a self-build cupboard that lives in my spare bedroom. Daughter, in the meanwhile, assembled my new dining chairs for me - I used my lovely combi/microwave, etc oven to cook a Victoria Sponge.
A very good Sunday for me.

I am enjoying reading about your experiences in different places. Just back in from drinks and nibbles next door with a host of other people all to do with U3A, lovely lovely people and all seem to be widowed. I am only a hop away from making friends but in a weird way am too scared of committing. I am active and not someone who sits and chats too often, I don`t play bridge or make much small talk. I am not ready yet for the older stage, these lovely ladies were all older and in that group of being out for coffee on a saturday etc I just don`t yet have that mental age or want to be commited to most days of the week. Its a scary next step but also is reassuring that the community is ready and willing to accept me

Only one thing to add about locations, several beaches in the sw do not allow dogs and I know that might be a deal breaker

Re focal points. I have a real fire, dd bought an electric coal effect fire when they had their new build. It was a good focal point. I do love having the chimney breast and stove and a focal point is important for many, including a lady I met here, who was viewing

Too much choice! If I were seriously considering downsizing, I wouldn't go too far from where I am so I could keep my friends and community but probably a small town/village with good public transport links. The problem there is that everyone else is looking for the same so the properties tend to be expensive.

Mosaicwarts I'll put in my two penny worth for areas. Crosby where I now live is close to the beach, shops , stations and hour on the bus to get to Liverpool. Formby, Woolton and Blundellsands are all good areas. 2 bed bungalows cost £200,00 +, 3 bed £240,00+ . It is very quiet where I am and the neighbours are lovely. There is a lot to do here. Where I used to live was lovely as well but bungalows were 100k more.

I was thinking about Ellianne's comment about London being for youngsters earlier. A while ago I was at Morrisons, at the narrow trolley park outside, and was digging around in my bag to find my 'Lidl' coin. I'd been there about 5 seconds when a young girl behind me said something like 'do you intend getting a trolley today' in a really sarcastic way! I was 4 seconds too long, please excuse me! You are right Ellianne, I'd probably get trampled to death if I returned, I've forgotten how to bob and weave!

I just popped in to say I had an honest conversation with my elderly aunt re Christmas gifts - she just wants a Boots voucher. Nice and easy for me and no more ridiculous £20 delivery charge as I try to get her 'special parcel' there next day before 1 pm!

I also wanted to tell you I bumped into the surveyor I engaged to do my survey in '18 - he was very odd, and paid my dog more attention than me, no eye contact. I wonder if he heard that the EA had been giving the survey to people without my permission - it was several weeks before I found out. I gave it to them so they could be informed if viewers asked questions about the roof etc. I'm older and wiser now, fourteen months later ;)

It is too much choice Grammaretto, I have the whole of the UK to choose from. The only thing I'll miss about here is the beach. I don't fit here at all, and do feel sad to be 62 and friendless but I never met anyone on my wavelength. The one friend I did make is now fully involved caring for her beautiful grandchild, she's too busy nowadays. So glad I have an empty diary tomorrow, going to plough on with my investigations and hopefully find somewhere to live where I can spend my time purposefully.

Yes craftyone dogs are banned from our touristy beach in the summer months but just along the coast they're allowed. There is a list of sw beaches where we can take dogs. Our boy likes the river, so he doesn't mind if he has to change his routine a bit!

Do you know I would never have thought of the crosby area but I am a Liverpool lass and we used to go to those beaches on sundays. Liverpool is one of those places where you would never be lonely, the people are very friendly. Liverpool is on the up so buying a bungalow in one of those areas may actually be a good investment. There is loads to do in liverpool and transport is still good. U3A is very active there. Have a look mosaics. I went from liverpool to northumberland at 18 and made the transition very easily, it would be the same in reverse.

Craftyone meant to say I contacted the Crosby U3A and am going to a talk about Victorian Liverpool on 9th. Had a very friendly email from the secretary. £2 for visitors including tea and biscuits. Not much to join so I will probably join.

My ex went to Liverpool Uni to study architecture, I went to visit him there once. Such fantastic houses, it was 1977 and I remember his friends being very hospitable and feeding us even though we weren't expected. I can't remember the names of the clubs he used to go to, but he wasn't a nice boyfriend so it's for the best!

Just sitting down again to do some research on Exeter, I'm determined to have a lie in tomorrow so it's warmer when I get up.

Hi everyone have had a hectic weekend here. DD and DGD arrived Friday for the weekend and then at 8pm DS2 arrived as well. Good job we had spare bedding from the caravan. Anyway, at 10.30 Friday night the dog started acting strange running in and out the house, had very bad stomach then took to the cupboard we had cleared out and taken the door off for her. OH has lined it out with clear perspex and there's light and power in there. It's off the kitchen. She delivered 8 puppies. 3 born an hour apart then 2 hr gap and that one sadly didn't make it. Then 2 more, then 5 hr gap and one more. Then I rang the the vet and he injected her and last one was born 5minutes later. 12 hours altogether. We all stayed up most of the night. Vet came back and checked her again and the pups so all is ok We now have 7 puppies and 2 dogs.
All shattered for the weekend so nothing done no unpacking, housework nothing but tomorrow is another day as they say.
Last time I had puppies I was in my 30s but it was much easier than this. My collie just popped them out first you knew about it was when you saw the litter no illness before and all over in a few hrs.
DS2 and DIL may come next weekend so we need to do some more unpacking this week. Have ordered a daybed from ikea that turns into a double bed ready
Hope all is going well for everyone All the best xx

Well done to you girl Sazzl. 8 in 12 hours is not bad going. I bred dogs for 30 years - the last litter some years ago now. It was much easier having the first litter when I was in my 20's than it was the last in my 60's. The main reason I stopped because it was getting too hard to manage not only the whelping but the next 8 weeks. I was lucky in that most of my litters were just popped out albeit over time and with minimal intervention.

Best you get some unpacking done soon because in a few weeks you will be time poor with raising the pups. Will these pups be KC registered?

Sazzl glad the puppies arrived safely. The mom must be exhausted. New home new life. At least you had extra hands to help out.

SueH49 how are you? Is the infection responding to the antibiotics?

Oooo puppies! How lovely, congratulations! The unpacking can wait.

Congratulations Sazzl, so sorry for the little one who didn't make it Glad the vet was able to come quickly and help, lots of fun for you checking out new areas when you home check their new homes! Catch up on some sleep and hope you enjoy unpacking your treasures.

Thanks for all your good wishes. Son daughter and OH were all taking turns watching the bitch and pups. They are working cocker spaniel pups KC registered and we planned the litter as I wanted another dog. The mother is the most docile loving dog ever so hopefully they will be the same. We don't work her as we don't agree with shooting for sport. They wont be docked either. Vet came twice haven't had the bill yet I'm dreading it but we have savings put aside for vet bills so ok.
All the best to everyone xxx

Mosaicwarts, driving to Sainsbury this morning, I go through WsM suburbs (Milton and Worle). Notice that these have a large number of very nice bungalows . When I look on rightmove, they seem to be reasonably priced (2 bedroom ones between two and two and half hundred thousand three bedroom ones around three hundred thousand plus).
The trains to London stop at both these stations, there is easy access to the M5, buses go direct to Bristol, and the beach is close by. Good communities there, only reason I never looked at those areas was that I wanted to be very close to my daughter who lives near to WsM station.
Just a thought for you to look at.

Thank you so much Franbern Painter is outside and driving my dog mad, I've come on here for some peace!

Will have a look later on, have just remembered my daughter will need a shirt for tomorrow and looking for replacement filters for my iron on line - honestly, £22.51 for genuine parts as opposed to £6 for knock off. I can't risk the iron breaking, it was so much money at the time - and stupidly I decluttered my spare iron. I have a Morphy Richards Jetsteam.

No news is good news I hope. Will he, won't he, who knows!

mosaics, he isn`t going to send a message to say that the survey is ok. He would send a message if it wasn`t. What that means is that the sale seems to be going ahead at a pace, there is no time to waste. The worse case of a sale like this is that he starts to push to get the deed done and you might be up the creek, with no paddle. Honest but honest, it is imperative to get ready, Look for an area, sort and pack all at the same time. Could be talking about january but I kind of expect stressful things to happen towards christmas

Your Estate Agent should know how happy he is with the =survey. When my purchaser had his, it was my EA who telephoned them to find out whether or not they were happy with it. Worth contacting your EA for them to chase up, in their interest to get your house sold.

Thanks, I couldn't resist, and just phoned the EA. They haven't heard anything from him yet. I am expecting a no, even though I secretly hope for a yes! I've just go to take a deep breath and carry on with my Christmas prep and start decluttering as you suggest craftyone. I was thinking of all the things I sold when the cash buyer had offered - could have given some of them as xmas presents!

Poor daughter is going to have a bad time getting home as the trains are disrupted, no idea what time I'll be driving to collect her tonight.

Morning all, had to do the twenty mile scary drive to collect my daughter last night and it was OK as the weather has improved. So lucky she ran for this train, the last two were cancelled as she thought they might be and she'd have had to stay in an expensive hotel. I felt so sorry for the people stuck for four hours. Need to buy more Rescue Remedy spray as it ran out last night.

Delivery day today, supposed to wait in from 8 am to 6 pm, one exciting xmas clothing for my daughter, and one essential 12 very heavy bags of fire logs. Hope my new house has a 'safe' place to leave parcels.

A week today since the survey, I am just going to keep busy today and try to put it out of my mind.

Have a good day everyone